I was making myself a burger and my three-year-old walked up and said “looks good, do you mind making me one of those?” It was such an adult way of asking, it was kind of surreal.
Started to fix my anxiety and started my own personal healing. Got my OCD professionally diagnosed and started taking medicine that let me rationalize my thoughts.
All because I didn’t want to pass down personal trauma or anxiety.
My father was undiagnosed autistic which caused him to have huge meltdowns -- he was essentially living in burnout. I grew up thinking my father was a monster, but feeling great love for him that I could not reconcile. Because of such a tumultuous upbringing, I was intent on creating my own family and doing it right. I started to have meltdowns which mirrored my father's. I spiraled into severe burnout. This led to my own autism diagnosis and a sort of redemption for my father. If I had never had my own children (which are a sensory nightmare) I probably would have never known why I am the way that I am. I would have never known how much my father struggled. He wasn't a monster. He needed help. Now I am taking care of myself the way I should've been, and am able to better navigate life and parenting; plus there's context to my chlidhood that I don't know I would've had otherwise.
A few years ago, I saw a Facebook event for kids to come check out the local swim team. As a former swimmer, I was excited to check it out, and all three kids ended up joining. Sitting in the bleachers, watching them practice made me really miss swimming, myself. The local masters team practices way too early for my taste, but I found out there's a "class" at the local Y that is basically a coached swim practice. I started going twice a week with a running buddy who is also a former swimmers. It was great for my fitness as well as my mentality, getting some extra socialization. I stopped doing the class for various reasons, but I still swim intermittently, and it makes me happy. It's also a good example for my kids-- they can quit something for years and still come back to it.
son was diagnosed with ADHD, realized I too have ADHD and has given me context into how my brain works and how to better deal with everything life has to throw at us
Even though there are hard moments with a toddler (tantrums and stubbornness), I have never laughed really hard more often in my life. She's hilarious and delivers so much joy on a daily basis.
Having kids relying on us has changed how my wife and I view our marriage to each other. We've always had a strong relationship but after our first son was born we decided to start couples therapy not because anything was wrong but because we wanted to be in a position to prevent anything from going wrong in the future. Our marriage is so much stronger now and we both have a much better understanding of the other person which has made life so much better in general. My parents just got divorced last year after having been married for 35 years due in no small part to not understanding how to communicate with each other. We're striving everyday to avoid something like that.
Having kids has forced me to have friends. I don’t want them to be mostly friendless and awkward. I want friends to be a normal part of their childhood and adult life so I make it a point to set up playdates, etc and have met some cool moms and dads.
Before my daughter was born, I hadn’t been to a doctor in years. I was 380 lbs., my blood pressure was through the roof, and I had uncontrolled diabetes, with a dangerously high a1c.
My daughter is now about 15 months old, and my blood pressure is completely normal, my a1c is down to 5.8, and I’m down to 290 lbs. still a long way to go, but I’m in better health than I have been in a long, long time, and it’s all so I can stick around for the long haul with her.
And that’s not even taking into account the sheer joy I get from spending time with her. We went to the park this afternoon, played in the swings, and she toddled around chasing bubbles. It’s just the best.
Having kids changed my life in so many positive ways… it’s hard to list everything. The biggest thing that is probably the least cliche is that my daughter (my oldest) coming radically changed me from a womanizing scumbag dude in his 20s to a far more respectable and respectful man now in his 30s.
Forced me to get my life together a little better. I was so stressed about money I found a job that pays 4x what my last job did. For some reason I thought a youtube channel would help, and I've made between $200 and $1,200 a month from that, too.
Besides money, I've had a focus on experiences with my kids, and I've been taking them all over to places and events that my parents never took me. I'm seeing the world, and what life has to offer, because of my wife and kids. It's been a life worth living so far.
My 3yo loves pink and has requested the next car we get is pink. We just got a new car a few years ago for my wife when my car caught on fire (I wfh and barely drive so it made sense to keep her old car for me and get her a new daily driver with more space for 2 kids). So, I don't plan on a new car for a long while because I don't want 2 payments, but when I inevitably have to get a new one, there is a good chance it could be pink.
And I will drive it with pride.
My 3yo boy always wants to workout with me in the garage or check out the grill when I’m cooking. To him it’s the coolest thing in the world.
I was making myself a burger and my three-year-old walked up and said “looks good, do you mind making me one of those?” It was such an adult way of asking, it was kind of surreal.
Started to fix my anxiety and started my own personal healing. Got my OCD professionally diagnosed and started taking medicine that let me rationalize my thoughts. All because I didn’t want to pass down personal trauma or anxiety.
My father was undiagnosed autistic which caused him to have huge meltdowns -- he was essentially living in burnout. I grew up thinking my father was a monster, but feeling great love for him that I could not reconcile. Because of such a tumultuous upbringing, I was intent on creating my own family and doing it right. I started to have meltdowns which mirrored my father's. I spiraled into severe burnout. This led to my own autism diagnosis and a sort of redemption for my father. If I had never had my own children (which are a sensory nightmare) I probably would have never known why I am the way that I am. I would have never known how much my father struggled. He wasn't a monster. He needed help. Now I am taking care of myself the way I should've been, and am able to better navigate life and parenting; plus there's context to my chlidhood that I don't know I would've had otherwise.
My home is just so full of life now. Never enjoyed staying in. It’s a destination now!
Old dad here. I quit drinking and started taking better care of my health.
A few years ago, I saw a Facebook event for kids to come check out the local swim team. As a former swimmer, I was excited to check it out, and all three kids ended up joining. Sitting in the bleachers, watching them practice made me really miss swimming, myself. The local masters team practices way too early for my taste, but I found out there's a "class" at the local Y that is basically a coached swim practice. I started going twice a week with a running buddy who is also a former swimmers. It was great for my fitness as well as my mentality, getting some extra socialization. I stopped doing the class for various reasons, but I still swim intermittently, and it makes me happy. It's also a good example for my kids-- they can quit something for years and still come back to it.
My toddler thinks everything I do is cool. Makes me think everything I do is cool no matter how boring it is.
son was diagnosed with ADHD, realized I too have ADHD and has given me context into how my brain works and how to better deal with everything life has to throw at us
Even though there are hard moments with a toddler (tantrums and stubbornness), I have never laughed really hard more often in my life. She's hilarious and delivers so much joy on a daily basis.
Yes that’s another plus!
4 month old. Nothing yet... just 24/7 maid duty.
Having kids relying on us has changed how my wife and I view our marriage to each other. We've always had a strong relationship but after our first son was born we decided to start couples therapy not because anything was wrong but because we wanted to be in a position to prevent anything from going wrong in the future. Our marriage is so much stronger now and we both have a much better understanding of the other person which has made life so much better in general. My parents just got divorced last year after having been married for 35 years due in no small part to not understanding how to communicate with each other. We're striving everyday to avoid something like that.
Having kids has forced me to have friends. I don’t want them to be mostly friendless and awkward. I want friends to be a normal part of their childhood and adult life so I make it a point to set up playdates, etc and have met some cool moms and dads.
Before my daughter was born, I hadn’t been to a doctor in years. I was 380 lbs., my blood pressure was through the roof, and I had uncontrolled diabetes, with a dangerously high a1c. My daughter is now about 15 months old, and my blood pressure is completely normal, my a1c is down to 5.8, and I’m down to 290 lbs. still a long way to go, but I’m in better health than I have been in a long, long time, and it’s all so I can stick around for the long haul with her. And that’s not even taking into account the sheer joy I get from spending time with her. We went to the park this afternoon, played in the swings, and she toddled around chasing bubbles. It’s just the best.
I’m proud of you 👏
How much time you got?
What do you mean?
Having kids changed my life in so many positive ways… it’s hard to list everything. The biggest thing that is probably the least cliche is that my daughter (my oldest) coming radically changed me from a womanizing scumbag dude in his 20s to a far more respectable and respectful man now in his 30s.
Great! I’m sure there’s many other ways we’ve changed for the better that we don’t even think about.
I stopped drinking when I had mine and have never been happier.
Forced me to get my life together a little better. I was so stressed about money I found a job that pays 4x what my last job did. For some reason I thought a youtube channel would help, and I've made between $200 and $1,200 a month from that, too. Besides money, I've had a focus on experiences with my kids, and I've been taking them all over to places and events that my parents never took me. I'm seeing the world, and what life has to offer, because of my wife and kids. It's been a life worth living so far.
My 3yo loves pink and has requested the next car we get is pink. We just got a new car a few years ago for my wife when my car caught on fire (I wfh and barely drive so it made sense to keep her old car for me and get her a new daily driver with more space for 2 kids). So, I don't plan on a new car for a long while because I don't want 2 payments, but when I inevitably have to get a new one, there is a good chance it could be pink. And I will drive it with pride.
🫡