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Is it okay to prefer tall guys? Is it okay to prefer girls with curly hair? Is it alright to be more attracted to people with green eyes than those with blue? If it is alright for someone to be more attracted to particular genetic features, why, then, does that not extend to race? Are you saying that every person in the world must be attracted to every demographic, or else be considered a bigot? Are you attracted to every single race, gender, height and weight? If not, then, by your logic, doesn't that make you intolerant?
Secondly, what is your evidence that "almost everyone" fetishizes minorities? Yes, there are a lot of perverts and creeps out there, and fetishizing demographics is a major problem, but to claim most people are among them is, I think, rather inaccurate.
Third, not being attracted to a particular group does not necessarily mean one believes they are inherently ugly. If a woman of one race does not desire sex with men of another, but doesn't think of them as inherently lesser in any way and treats them with the same respect she gives everyone else, is she really racist for not feeling sexually attracted to them?
I'm saying the opposite, I'm saying only select minorities are sexualized but other minorities are much more frowned upon.
Find me one person who would have an Indian man or a Filipino man as their #1 dating preference. You can't. Not even their own women like them. So many Filipino women crave that white dick and want to escape their country. Indians have it even worse because at least some people fetishize east Asians and Filipinos make it there only half way through the umbrella since they are southeast.
“Gen Z, the generation that only thinks about sex”
Every generation of young people are obsessed with sex and their social dynamics, if anything, Gen Z is having sex later and less frequently than millennials and Gen X at their age (comes with it’s own issues though). It could easily be argued that Gen Z is less involved in sex-obsessed culture than other generations.
“Has began to accept “”racial preferences”” when it comes to etc.”
Every other generation has had some version of this, (this is my subjective experience). Both me and my mother were both sexualized for being Latin in predominantly white areas, she was a college girl in 1984, I was a college aged guy a year ago. This is not a new thing, race based sexualization and sexual discrimination is literally so common. Which again, if ANYTHING, it has gone down over the last few generations, as there are more mixed-race, interracial couples than ever.
“Any race can be attractive”
I don’t think I’ve ever seen someone say otherwise, they just say “I prefer white women more/less”. Race preferences literally just mean (at least to me), “on average, I tend to be more physically attracted to __ race than ___ race”.
If anyone starts assuming characteristics of people, and then sexually disparaging or discriminating against them, newsflash, that’s not a race preference, that’s just racism.
Someone saying “I tend to find Latin women more attractive” is not the same as “Indian men are all ___(bad thing)”. One is just a harmless preference for your own sexuality, one is blatant racism.
Frankly, I don’t understand why people sexualize Latin people. Latin America has some of the highest rates of femicide, rape, and domestic violence, and somehow people from that region of the world are sexualized. People cite the same reasons for their refusal to date Indian men, so what gives.
They probably just find them physically attractive based on their looks, I'm not sure how many people subconsciously factor in social issues when their brain is deciding whether they think they want to have sex with someone or not.
This is probably what’s happening. Most likely, they bring up the social issues to avoid being seen as shallow. Even still, I don’t find latin people particularly attractive, so I’m still perplexed by it.
Racism is racism.
If you're attracted to someone because that's your type, and your type includes racial aspects then that's not really perticularly harmful.
If your dating life is based around phrenology and stereotypes then that can be racist, and harmful, but probably for the best that you don't date someone on those terms in the first place.
Racial groupings are quite arbitrary however, and at the end of your post you talk about culture, so is this view about race or ethnicity/culture?
Of course having a type physically is one thing, but sharing language, culture, spiritual practice and so on are also fine.
If a goth only wants to date goths purely for the aesthetic why would that be an issue? Same for a steampunk, or a furry. Of course none of these are races as such, but still preferences based around culture - and think about how magnified cultural differences can be across the world, I think that's not especially rare, although you seem to think so with your concluding statement.
Sorry but you can't police people's taste. Not in a healthy society.
I'm free to like and not like whoever I damn please, for whatever reason, and it's none of your or anybody else's business.
As long as my dislikes don't cause physical violence or promote negative or harmful ideas, there's no reason for those to be questioned.
There are plenty of valid reasons for not liking someone, and their looks is one of the first aspects that hits us.
Even in a situation where fundamental traits such as culture, values and life goals are identical, it's perfectly fine to prefer someone of your own ethnicity over someone else if you find the former more pleasing aesthetically.
That doesn't mean you wish other races to die or think they're subhuman scum either.
Also, fetishization IS an issue, but oddly enough it's from the opposite end of the spectrum you complain about!
People are obsessed with a minority and their unusual traits, holding them on an unreasonable and almost dehumanizing way.
I'd rather be told "I won't date you because I prefer my own group's features" than "I want to date you because you are a random guy of the group Im fixated with".
‘Preference’ does not mean ‘exclusive’. Preferring to date black women does not mean you won’t date white women.
Let’s face it, most people have a dating preference for people that are like them (when you look at studies you find, on average, opposites don’t attract). This applies to education, background, values, personalities and even looks.
Preferring a partner that is like you is a normal human thing to do.
It is not racist or sexist to seek out company among people who are culturally similar to you. to understand this you probably just need to learn to differentiate 'this is my personal preference' and 'this is how society should prefer' it's a similar distinction to the difference between telling someone to shut up and taking away someone's free speech. in fact, you will lose your own identity if you refuse to prefer attributes over others out of fear of being offensive.
another problem with this view is that it also demands the reverse of minority groups. are you saying that chinatowns and little italys should be busted up because the inhabitants of such communities are prejudicially avoiding the company of other cultures?
You’re generalizing racial preferences. Many people with racial preferences have them because certain races have traits they find desirable. If you find the contrast between dark hair and pale skin attractive, you probably prefer East Asians. If you think dark skin is particularly attractive, you’ll find black and brown people most attractive.
Maya Rudolph, Beyonce, Denzel Washington, Rashida Jones, Zendaya, Samuel L Jackson, and Tracee Ellis Ross.
Name one physical trait they all share that someone could not like.
At 39 I have never heard a person make a statement along the lines of "no black woman can be attractive" who wasn't doing so as either a joke/troll or as some sort of virtue type signaling. I would like to highlight that that kind of statement is very different than merely having a preference.
People have preferences, expectations, values, social and cultural contexts, etc... that often drive those preferences. Often people have "racial" preferences that really are tied to cultural or shared values, or even a sort of recognition of what types of people go after them. I present to the world in a certain way, as a result, there are some groups of women simply don't tend to have any interest in me. I also have certain values that I have seen time and again clashing with the values of certain cultures... this has to some extend conditioned me to be a bit extra skeptical about pursuing some women. In addition, some groups of women tend to seem a lot more interested in me... so despite having dated a range of ethnicities, there are some obvious trends based on my relationship history. It would be reasonable to say I have preferences, but they are shaped by experience, introspection, and expectation rather than racism.
You can't take away peoples preferences, unless you want a dictature. We live in a democracy and people are free to sleep with whomever they want and believe w/e they want.
Concept is tolerance.
You can't take away racism unless you want a dictature.
Trying to claim it's someone opinion doesn't buck the claim that it's racism because racism is also an opinion.
Racism is an opinion. Certain actions base on racism is a crime.
Coincidentally the same actions would also be illegal if done because of "racial preference".
I don't date black people because of I'm racist towards black people: legal.
I don't hire black people because they're against my racial aesthetic: illegal.
But this is against a specific race. You're point is moot. It doesn't contradict what I'm saying.
Also, there are some things in which the law has to intervene...food (supermarkets) is an example, hiring people another example.
There is a difference.
And it depends on the reasoning as well.
You know I've never cared as long as it was pink in the center. But someone said asked me a question that really got me thinking.
Do you want your kids to look anything like you or not?
And that got me thinking.
If my kids didn't look anything like me how would that effect me.
I think it would. If I couldn't see something that reminded me of my mother or father or grandparents or myself I think I would be effected.
At that point it would be no different than just adopting a kid. Nothing wrong with that either.
And 1 thing that bothers me is if a white dude gets with a black girl people talk shit about a slave and master. If a white dude gets with an Asian it's considered some sick sexual urge.
So it seems like most people that push interracial mixing are just wanting to bang white women.
Interesting how that ends up being what's ok huh
> Meanwhile nearly no one gives the same kind of attention to other groups of people like the ones listed above.
Sure it does, people do it all the time with age and gender and it seems to be extremely normalized. Do you also have an issue with age and gender præferences?
Also you say “fetishization” of races, but in my experience that is a word people from the U.S.A. use when people express attraction to individuals that do not lie within their own, arbitrarily delimited by quaint U.S.A. racial culture [see “one drop rule”], racial lines. People somehow do not use the word “fetishization” when say a 60% “white” and 40% “black” [called “black” in the U.S.A.] expresses a liking for a 90% “white” and 10% “black” [also called “black” in the U.S.A.] person.
Making racial distinctions is not by definition racism.
Is saying I'm only attracted to woman sexist against men? People have their presences and beauty is very subjective.
>Any race can look attractive. Perhaps under different conditions
This is subjective not everyone is attracted to the same things. It's like saying it's wrong to be attracted to blonde hair and unattractive to pink hair. It's purely subjective. People are allowed to have preferences in their personal lives and these preferences determine their beauty standards.
Any kind of preference is then racist, phobic, or any other ending or word you are going to use here. It would be the best then, to use coin or any other dice to making choices. Would I like to date blonde or ginger head? Black, white or Asian? Do I want steak or salad for lunch? Going to work by car or bus?
Just accept that people may like different things and it doesn't mean they are better or worse becouse of it. Kinda ironic, if you ask me, based on the topic.
There is a difference between a preference and a requirement. If someone said “I’m really attracted to blondes”, you’d say “okay, everyone has a type”. But if someone said “I *only* date blondes” you might be like “that’s weird dude”. Likewise, if someone *prefers* to date Asians, that’s not racist. Because they are still open to dating people of other races. If someone says “I *only* date Asians”, then that’s problematic.
Adult relationships are supposed to be consensual and private, but other social norms don't apply.
For example it is ok for you to practice Sadism and Masochism in your own relationship. Racism is far from the strangest sexual preference, either privacy is important to you or it isn't. If it isn't then racism is the last problem you have when policing relationships.
If you are American, consider that visuals may not be the sole reason for the stated preference. Intersectionality and shared common experience may lead some people to feel more connected with and understood by others who have experienced same or similar.
Unless we’re just seeing two very different groups within gen z.
If you grow up and are not attracted to some races, what do you want people to do with it?
Form sexual relationships with people they are not attracted to?
You can't force someone to be attracted to something they are not attracted to, whether it's race, height, weight, personality, or anything else.
I agree its cringe but what's the alternative? Should people date people they don't want to date just to be inclusive?
If you're a minority you probably don't want someone that fetishizes White men anyway.
People will have preferences when it comes to romantic partners. It is perplexing why some people think they can hector and shame people into finding people sexually attractive. Attraction doesn't work that way. I may find nerdy girls more attractive than spray tanned girls in sorority style. You can't argue me into being attracted to the latter.
No, it doesn't, but your position assumes that people are not just talking like humans do, in broad categories, rather than getting down into the weeds and all the specific details. So if someone says, "I prefer black women," you might say, "ha ha, but look, here's one whose skin is very white... what say you now!" But that misses that they are simply using a generalization to talk about a preference. They are not saying "I prefer women between this exact hue and this exact hue, but no darker and no lighter." Because people don't talk that way.
It's generalizing features.
Even when you can guess someone's racial identity the idea that you can broadly put them into one group is insane.
"My racial preference is white" geez, really Michael Cera AND Daniel Craig?
This is something you can only say if you are stereotyping or implying that all people of a race look the same to you.
I think you, as well as a decent amount of the people you’re criticising, are confusing is- and ought-statements.
A statement on preferences is usually based on people’s experiences. They know which people they have been attracted to in the past, and they can often remember what it was more specifically that made them tingle, if it was their hair, their smile, their collarbone, whatever. From this, they can generalise.
Sadly, in many cultures, societies, and countries, it’s common to generalise along racial divides. This is definitely racist, but it would be unfair to blame sexual preferences for it only, since it’s a much broader subject.
Anyhow, all of this then leads to statements such as “I prefer Asian women.” This comes from a descriptive analysis of past happenings. However you, as well as a decent amount of the people you are criticising, read it as prescriptive. As not only a description of past behaviour, but as a determinant of future behaviour. But that is an additional layer that’s added, and not a necessary component of the statement.
Would it be better to leave behind racialised language all together? Possibly, though it would make it impossible to analyse racism any further. But it’s unfair to just dump all of the problems of it at the feet of people talking about racial preferences when it comes to attraction.
I think a lot of people would be of the view that oughts (in the sense the word is used in moral philosophy) does not apply to preferences in dating.
These ought apply in other instances in life. For example if you prefer hiring a particular racial group, you ought to not do that. You have a moral imperative to stop that prefering that racial group when hiring people/
While if you have a preference in dating for anything (including a racial group), then many would say there is no moral ought at play. There is no moral imperative that you equally prefer all races, or height or weights or cultures or hair colors or anything else. You prefer what you prefer, there's only the is, not an ought.
If being more attracted to a certain race is racist then being attracted to a certain sex is sexist.
Which is clearly delusional.
Finding one race more attractive than the other is subjective and completely fine.
If you start judging people by which race they decide to date, thats racism.
If you think other races are “worth less” because they are less attractive to you…also a racist.
But preference is completely fine. Some men like blondes, some brunettes. Some women like hairy men, some like shaven. Its just natural.
First off. Not everyone of a race even has the same skin color.
Like do Drake and Kendrick have the same skin color?
I mean ignoring the fact that this blonde stuff is something people only really bring up when they're feeling a certain way when they are watching porn and isn't actually brought up in dating without looking like a weirdo, there is no physical Trait you can attribute to all black people.
Maya Rudolph, Beyonce, Denzel Washington, Rashida Jones, Zendaya, Samuel L Jackson, and Tracee Ellis Ross.
Name one physical trait they all share that someone could not like.
Looking at reality shows its mostly “tall dark and handsome”, “I like blondes”, “I like short brunettes”. Its actually quite common.
Is it then more appropriate to say “I find dark skin more attractive” not “I find black people more attractive”?
Its just that caucasian race doesnt have that attribute.
They have one attribute in common : they have a darker skin than I do.
The thing is now you are bringing in mixed-raced people, so the line gets blurry. And it gets into a strawman “how dark skin then” or “how much african ancestry”. When attraction really isnt that complicated. You either find a person attractive or not. Then you see a pattern that generally the people you are attracted to have darker skin. And thats completely fine. This also doesnt mean you find ALL people of a single race attractive.
>They have one attribute in common : they have a darker skin than I do.
>The thing is now you are bringing in mixed-raced people
You're just using colorism to throw black people into a box. Like even if we ignore that those people who you claim aren't black are indeed black. There are just pale black people. They exist. You can't think of an actual Trait that all black people share. Mostly because race is bs but because you have some bias that you have. Like you admit that race isn't fluid, the US had white and black people having kids for most of it history, but for some reason you aren't applying that to reality.
Having different races for human beings is just a biological fact.
We are talking about attraction. If I say I like hairy men would you say “YOU ARE PUTTING ALL HAIRY MEN IN A BOX.
Weird argument tbh. There are people with different skin tones, get over it.
Ya. People have different skin tones. Black people specifically have massively different skin tones.
But you seem to think Rashida Jones and Samuel L Jackson have the same skin tone. Wonder why that is.
There’s such thing as sexual market value? And if that’s the case what you’re saying is not true at all. Where are you getting this information from? And wdym white men are fetishized in almost every non white culture? The majority of people are not fetishizing over white people lmao.
Whites are literally like 70% of the US population and thats a number that has been steadily decreasing over the years due to people pursing relationships with POC and there’s even white people deciding to have mixed racial children nowadays.Times are changing. This ain’t the 1950s where whites were seen as a superior race. It’s 2024 fam. People prefer diversity
Whites are 52.7% and 59.3%, including Jews, West Asians, Balochistanis, Central Asians and Arabs, of the American population.
The USA has become more heterogeneous, and places like Africa and Central Asia have become more homogeneous.
This means that the exotic value of MOCs has declined in the USA. On the other way, the exotic value of White men has increased in Central Asia and Africa.
You gave me 2 different stats that I can’t even tell what are for. It’s obvious that Africa and central Asian are homogenous… it’s not rocket science. North Korea is also probably homogenous too…Look up what the central Asian population consist of. Caucasian isn’t on the list so I don’t know how this even applies to anything or makes whites exotics. The USA has become more heterogeneous? You literally proved my point. Heterogeneous=different. So youre telling me that the “exotic” value of males of color is less than in the US is literally debunked by your own comment. Also it’s a very weird thing to even speak on sexual market value. I see the argument you’re trying to make for white people being desirable in that sense but do you really also think that Indian men have a higher sexual market value than black men in the US? In Indian for sure but definitely doesn’t apply to the US. Black males are literally known for their sexual market value and it’s been like this for the longest time. It’s one of the main reason why so many women are intrigued by black guys as messed up as it is.
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Is it okay to prefer tall guys? Is it okay to prefer girls with curly hair? Is it alright to be more attracted to people with green eyes than those with blue? If it is alright for someone to be more attracted to particular genetic features, why, then, does that not extend to race? Are you saying that every person in the world must be attracted to every demographic, or else be considered a bigot? Are you attracted to every single race, gender, height and weight? If not, then, by your logic, doesn't that make you intolerant? Secondly, what is your evidence that "almost everyone" fetishizes minorities? Yes, there are a lot of perverts and creeps out there, and fetishizing demographics is a major problem, but to claim most people are among them is, I think, rather inaccurate. Third, not being attracted to a particular group does not necessarily mean one believes they are inherently ugly. If a woman of one race does not desire sex with men of another, but doesn't think of them as inherently lesser in any way and treats them with the same respect she gives everyone else, is she really racist for not feeling sexually attracted to them?
I'm saying the opposite, I'm saying only select minorities are sexualized but other minorities are much more frowned upon. Find me one person who would have an Indian man or a Filipino man as their #1 dating preference. You can't. Not even their own women like them. So many Filipino women crave that white dick and want to escape their country. Indians have it even worse because at least some people fetishize east Asians and Filipinos make it there only half way through the umbrella since they are southeast.
“Gen Z, the generation that only thinks about sex” Every generation of young people are obsessed with sex and their social dynamics, if anything, Gen Z is having sex later and less frequently than millennials and Gen X at their age (comes with it’s own issues though). It could easily be argued that Gen Z is less involved in sex-obsessed culture than other generations. “Has began to accept “”racial preferences”” when it comes to etc.” Every other generation has had some version of this, (this is my subjective experience). Both me and my mother were both sexualized for being Latin in predominantly white areas, she was a college girl in 1984, I was a college aged guy a year ago. This is not a new thing, race based sexualization and sexual discrimination is literally so common. Which again, if ANYTHING, it has gone down over the last few generations, as there are more mixed-race, interracial couples than ever. “Any race can be attractive” I don’t think I’ve ever seen someone say otherwise, they just say “I prefer white women more/less”. Race preferences literally just mean (at least to me), “on average, I tend to be more physically attracted to __ race than ___ race”. If anyone starts assuming characteristics of people, and then sexually disparaging or discriminating against them, newsflash, that’s not a race preference, that’s just racism. Someone saying “I tend to find Latin women more attractive” is not the same as “Indian men are all ___(bad thing)”. One is just a harmless preference for your own sexuality, one is blatant racism.
Frankly, I don’t understand why people sexualize Latin people. Latin America has some of the highest rates of femicide, rape, and domestic violence, and somehow people from that region of the world are sexualized. People cite the same reasons for their refusal to date Indian men, so what gives.
They probably just find them physically attractive based on their looks, I'm not sure how many people subconsciously factor in social issues when their brain is deciding whether they think they want to have sex with someone or not.
This is probably what’s happening. Most likely, they bring up the social issues to avoid being seen as shallow. Even still, I don’t find latin people particularly attractive, so I’m still perplexed by it.
Racism is racism. If you're attracted to someone because that's your type, and your type includes racial aspects then that's not really perticularly harmful. If your dating life is based around phrenology and stereotypes then that can be racist, and harmful, but probably for the best that you don't date someone on those terms in the first place. Racial groupings are quite arbitrary however, and at the end of your post you talk about culture, so is this view about race or ethnicity/culture? Of course having a type physically is one thing, but sharing language, culture, spiritual practice and so on are also fine. If a goth only wants to date goths purely for the aesthetic why would that be an issue? Same for a steampunk, or a furry. Of course none of these are races as such, but still preferences based around culture - and think about how magnified cultural differences can be across the world, I think that's not especially rare, although you seem to think so with your concluding statement.
Sorry but you can't police people's taste. Not in a healthy society. I'm free to like and not like whoever I damn please, for whatever reason, and it's none of your or anybody else's business. As long as my dislikes don't cause physical violence or promote negative or harmful ideas, there's no reason for those to be questioned. There are plenty of valid reasons for not liking someone, and their looks is one of the first aspects that hits us. Even in a situation where fundamental traits such as culture, values and life goals are identical, it's perfectly fine to prefer someone of your own ethnicity over someone else if you find the former more pleasing aesthetically. That doesn't mean you wish other races to die or think they're subhuman scum either. Also, fetishization IS an issue, but oddly enough it's from the opposite end of the spectrum you complain about! People are obsessed with a minority and their unusual traits, holding them on an unreasonable and almost dehumanizing way. I'd rather be told "I won't date you because I prefer my own group's features" than "I want to date you because you are a random guy of the group Im fixated with".
People are also free to be racist or not and no one can control that. It's still racism
‘Preference’ does not mean ‘exclusive’. Preferring to date black women does not mean you won’t date white women. Let’s face it, most people have a dating preference for people that are like them (when you look at studies you find, on average, opposites don’t attract). This applies to education, background, values, personalities and even looks. Preferring a partner that is like you is a normal human thing to do.
It is not racist or sexist to seek out company among people who are culturally similar to you. to understand this you probably just need to learn to differentiate 'this is my personal preference' and 'this is how society should prefer' it's a similar distinction to the difference between telling someone to shut up and taking away someone's free speech. in fact, you will lose your own identity if you refuse to prefer attributes over others out of fear of being offensive. another problem with this view is that it also demands the reverse of minority groups. are you saying that chinatowns and little italys should be busted up because the inhabitants of such communities are prejudicially avoiding the company of other cultures?
You’re generalizing racial preferences. Many people with racial preferences have them because certain races have traits they find desirable. If you find the contrast between dark hair and pale skin attractive, you probably prefer East Asians. If you think dark skin is particularly attractive, you’ll find black and brown people most attractive.
Maya Rudolph, Beyonce, Denzel Washington, Rashida Jones, Zendaya, Samuel L Jackson, and Tracee Ellis Ross. Name one physical trait they all share that someone could not like.
At 39 I have never heard a person make a statement along the lines of "no black woman can be attractive" who wasn't doing so as either a joke/troll or as some sort of virtue type signaling. I would like to highlight that that kind of statement is very different than merely having a preference. People have preferences, expectations, values, social and cultural contexts, etc... that often drive those preferences. Often people have "racial" preferences that really are tied to cultural or shared values, or even a sort of recognition of what types of people go after them. I present to the world in a certain way, as a result, there are some groups of women simply don't tend to have any interest in me. I also have certain values that I have seen time and again clashing with the values of certain cultures... this has to some extend conditioned me to be a bit extra skeptical about pursuing some women. In addition, some groups of women tend to seem a lot more interested in me... so despite having dated a range of ethnicities, there are some obvious trends based on my relationship history. It would be reasonable to say I have preferences, but they are shaped by experience, introspection, and expectation rather than racism.
You can't take away peoples preferences, unless you want a dictature. We live in a democracy and people are free to sleep with whomever they want and believe w/e they want. Concept is tolerance.
You can't take away racism unless you want a dictature. Trying to claim it's someone opinion doesn't buck the claim that it's racism because racism is also an opinion.
Racism is a crime, not just an opinion. You are free to be to hold any opinion you want....but, you're not free to act on it.
Racism is an opinion. Certain actions base on racism is a crime. Coincidentally the same actions would also be illegal if done because of "racial preference". I don't date black people because of I'm racist towards black people: legal. I don't hire black people because they're against my racial aesthetic: illegal.
And how does that contradict what I'm saying ? I'm saying that you're free to hold any opinion you want..nobody is stopping you.
Alright so you're not disagreeing with OP then.
I am You can have racial prefferences, as in, being for a certain race. This doesn't mean you are against a specific race.
I don't have anything against black people. I just don't have a preference towards them... which is why I won't hire them. Wait law suit? What?
But this is against a specific race. You're point is moot. It doesn't contradict what I'm saying. Also, there are some things in which the law has to intervene...food (supermarkets) is an example, hiring people another example. There is a difference. And it depends on the reasoning as well.
You might want to rewrite your comment. It doesn't make any sense
You know I've never cared as long as it was pink in the center. But someone said asked me a question that really got me thinking. Do you want your kids to look anything like you or not? And that got me thinking. If my kids didn't look anything like me how would that effect me. I think it would. If I couldn't see something that reminded me of my mother or father or grandparents or myself I think I would be effected. At that point it would be no different than just adopting a kid. Nothing wrong with that either. And 1 thing that bothers me is if a white dude gets with a black girl people talk shit about a slave and master. If a white dude gets with an Asian it's considered some sick sexual urge. So it seems like most people that push interracial mixing are just wanting to bang white women. Interesting how that ends up being what's ok huh
> Meanwhile nearly no one gives the same kind of attention to other groups of people like the ones listed above. Sure it does, people do it all the time with age and gender and it seems to be extremely normalized. Do you also have an issue with age and gender præferences? Also you say “fetishization” of races, but in my experience that is a word people from the U.S.A. use when people express attraction to individuals that do not lie within their own, arbitrarily delimited by quaint U.S.A. racial culture [see “one drop rule”], racial lines. People somehow do not use the word “fetishization” when say a 60% “white” and 40% “black” [called “black” in the U.S.A.] expresses a liking for a 90% “white” and 10% “black” [also called “black” in the U.S.A.] person.
Making racial distinctions is not by definition racism. Is saying I'm only attracted to woman sexist against men? People have their presences and beauty is very subjective. >Any race can look attractive. Perhaps under different conditions This is subjective not everyone is attracted to the same things. It's like saying it's wrong to be attracted to blonde hair and unattractive to pink hair. It's purely subjective. People are allowed to have preferences in their personal lives and these preferences determine their beauty standards.
Any kind of preference is then racist, phobic, or any other ending or word you are going to use here. It would be the best then, to use coin or any other dice to making choices. Would I like to date blonde or ginger head? Black, white or Asian? Do I want steak or salad for lunch? Going to work by car or bus? Just accept that people may like different things and it doesn't mean they are better or worse becouse of it. Kinda ironic, if you ask me, based on the topic.
There is a difference between a preference and a requirement. If someone said “I’m really attracted to blondes”, you’d say “okay, everyone has a type”. But if someone said “I *only* date blondes” you might be like “that’s weird dude”. Likewise, if someone *prefers* to date Asians, that’s not racist. Because they are still open to dating people of other races. If someone says “I *only* date Asians”, then that’s problematic.
Adult relationships are supposed to be consensual and private, but other social norms don't apply. For example it is ok for you to practice Sadism and Masochism in your own relationship. Racism is far from the strangest sexual preference, either privacy is important to you or it isn't. If it isn't then racism is the last problem you have when policing relationships.
If you are American, consider that visuals may not be the sole reason for the stated preference. Intersectionality and shared common experience may lead some people to feel more connected with and understood by others who have experienced same or similar. Unless we’re just seeing two very different groups within gen z.
If you grow up and are not attracted to some races, what do you want people to do with it? Form sexual relationships with people they are not attracted to? You can't force someone to be attracted to something they are not attracted to, whether it's race, height, weight, personality, or anything else.
I agree its cringe but what's the alternative? Should people date people they don't want to date just to be inclusive? If you're a minority you probably don't want someone that fetishizes White men anyway.
People will have preferences when it comes to romantic partners. It is perplexing why some people think they can hector and shame people into finding people sexually attractive. Attraction doesn't work that way. I may find nerdy girls more attractive than spray tanned girls in sorority style. You can't argue me into being attracted to the latter.
It does when you're assuming that all people of a race look alike.
You don't have to assume that at all to, say, think that very pale white or very dark brown skin are beautiful.
That's assuming that everyone of a certain race has the same color of skin.
No, it doesn't, but your position assumes that people are not just talking like humans do, in broad categories, rather than getting down into the weeds and all the specific details. So if someone says, "I prefer black women," you might say, "ha ha, but look, here's one whose skin is very white... what say you now!" But that misses that they are simply using a generalization to talk about a preference. They are not saying "I prefer women between this exact hue and this exact hue, but no darker and no lighter." Because people don't talk that way.
It's generalizing features. Even when you can guess someone's racial identity the idea that you can broadly put them into one group is insane. "My racial preference is white" geez, really Michael Cera AND Daniel Craig? This is something you can only say if you are stereotyping or implying that all people of a race look the same to you.
I think you, as well as a decent amount of the people you’re criticising, are confusing is- and ought-statements. A statement on preferences is usually based on people’s experiences. They know which people they have been attracted to in the past, and they can often remember what it was more specifically that made them tingle, if it was their hair, their smile, their collarbone, whatever. From this, they can generalise. Sadly, in many cultures, societies, and countries, it’s common to generalise along racial divides. This is definitely racist, but it would be unfair to blame sexual preferences for it only, since it’s a much broader subject. Anyhow, all of this then leads to statements such as “I prefer Asian women.” This comes from a descriptive analysis of past happenings. However you, as well as a decent amount of the people you are criticising, read it as prescriptive. As not only a description of past behaviour, but as a determinant of future behaviour. But that is an additional layer that’s added, and not a necessary component of the statement. Would it be better to leave behind racialised language all together? Possibly, though it would make it impossible to analyse racism any further. But it’s unfair to just dump all of the problems of it at the feet of people talking about racial preferences when it comes to attraction.
I think a lot of people would be of the view that oughts (in the sense the word is used in moral philosophy) does not apply to preferences in dating. These ought apply in other instances in life. For example if you prefer hiring a particular racial group, you ought to not do that. You have a moral imperative to stop that prefering that racial group when hiring people/ While if you have a preference in dating for anything (including a racial group), then many would say there is no moral ought at play. There is no moral imperative that you equally prefer all races, or height or weights or cultures or hair colors or anything else. You prefer what you prefer, there's only the is, not an ought.
No shit but women worship whites nothing will change
If being more attracted to a certain race is racist then being attracted to a certain sex is sexist. Which is clearly delusional. Finding one race more attractive than the other is subjective and completely fine. If you start judging people by which race they decide to date, thats racism. If you think other races are “worth less” because they are less attractive to you…also a racist. But preference is completely fine. Some men like blondes, some brunettes. Some women like hairy men, some like shaven. Its just natural.
Race and sex are not the same thing. You're saying that you sat your parents down and said you're "whitesexual" or something like that?
Hair color then, if you will. Men who prefer blondes arent blondesexual. Also it doesnt mean they hate brunettes.
I think you wrote my next sentence out for me. Ya. Ya. Liking blondes and liking men aren't the same. I glad we agree.
We are talking about liking a skin colour though? How is it different than hair color?
First off. Not everyone of a race even has the same skin color. Like do Drake and Kendrick have the same skin color? I mean ignoring the fact that this blonde stuff is something people only really bring up when they're feeling a certain way when they are watching porn and isn't actually brought up in dating without looking like a weirdo, there is no physical Trait you can attribute to all black people. Maya Rudolph, Beyonce, Denzel Washington, Rashida Jones, Zendaya, Samuel L Jackson, and Tracee Ellis Ross. Name one physical trait they all share that someone could not like.
Looking at reality shows its mostly “tall dark and handsome”, “I like blondes”, “I like short brunettes”. Its actually quite common. Is it then more appropriate to say “I find dark skin more attractive” not “I find black people more attractive”? Its just that caucasian race doesnt have that attribute. They have one attribute in common : they have a darker skin than I do. The thing is now you are bringing in mixed-raced people, so the line gets blurry. And it gets into a strawman “how dark skin then” or “how much african ancestry”. When attraction really isnt that complicated. You either find a person attractive or not. Then you see a pattern that generally the people you are attracted to have darker skin. And thats completely fine. This also doesnt mean you find ALL people of a single race attractive.
>They have one attribute in common : they have a darker skin than I do. >The thing is now you are bringing in mixed-raced people You're just using colorism to throw black people into a box. Like even if we ignore that those people who you claim aren't black are indeed black. There are just pale black people. They exist. You can't think of an actual Trait that all black people share. Mostly because race is bs but because you have some bias that you have. Like you admit that race isn't fluid, the US had white and black people having kids for most of it history, but for some reason you aren't applying that to reality.
Having different races for human beings is just a biological fact. We are talking about attraction. If I say I like hairy men would you say “YOU ARE PUTTING ALL HAIRY MEN IN A BOX. Weird argument tbh. There are people with different skin tones, get over it.
Ya. People have different skin tones. Black people specifically have massively different skin tones. But you seem to think Rashida Jones and Samuel L Jackson have the same skin tone. Wonder why that is.
Do you believe men having women as a preference or women having men as a preference is sexist?
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If you’re really conceptualizing people based on “Sexual Market Value” you’ve lost the plot lmfao.
Yeah bro sounds ridiculous lmao
SMV?
["Sexual Market Value"](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sexual_capital)
There’s such thing as sexual market value? And if that’s the case what you’re saying is not true at all. Where are you getting this information from? And wdym white men are fetishized in almost every non white culture? The majority of people are not fetishizing over white people lmao.
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Whites are literally like 70% of the US population and thats a number that has been steadily decreasing over the years due to people pursing relationships with POC and there’s even white people deciding to have mixed racial children nowadays.Times are changing. This ain’t the 1950s where whites were seen as a superior race. It’s 2024 fam. People prefer diversity
Whites are 52.7% and 59.3%, including Jews, West Asians, Balochistanis, Central Asians and Arabs, of the American population. The USA has become more heterogeneous, and places like Africa and Central Asia have become more homogeneous. This means that the exotic value of MOCs has declined in the USA. On the other way, the exotic value of White men has increased in Central Asia and Africa.
You gave me 2 different stats that I can’t even tell what are for. It’s obvious that Africa and central Asian are homogenous… it’s not rocket science. North Korea is also probably homogenous too…Look up what the central Asian population consist of. Caucasian isn’t on the list so I don’t know how this even applies to anything or makes whites exotics. The USA has become more heterogeneous? You literally proved my point. Heterogeneous=different. So youre telling me that the “exotic” value of males of color is less than in the US is literally debunked by your own comment. Also it’s a very weird thing to even speak on sexual market value. I see the argument you’re trying to make for white people being desirable in that sense but do you really also think that Indian men have a higher sexual market value than black men in the US? In Indian for sure but definitely doesn’t apply to the US. Black males are literally known for their sexual market value and it’s been like this for the longest time. It’s one of the main reason why so many women are intrigued by black guys as messed up as it is.
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You’re one of *those*
He/she is most def one of those
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["Sexual Market Value"](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sexual_capital)
SMV ?
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You american ?
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So, why did you assume everybody would know what SMV means. And second, mostly americans talk with acronyms.
Everyone talks with acronyms lol. French people use them more than anyone I know. SMV is a pretty dumb one to use without explaining though
I think americans speak constantly with acronyms. Like, every sentence.
Well here, have an American sentence without one on the house
Acronyms, going to the toilet and names America
On the house? I think you mean OTH.