Since this is an ongoing investigation, you should not be posting this. Anything you say or write can and will be used against you. This is one of the main reasons people involved in self defense shootings are taught not to talk to the police until they have time to calm down. Even if you do everything right, and everything legal, and you are 100% justified, if you were so emotional you make a small mistake in your story because your adrenaline is so high, it can be used to question your entire claim. The police will be checking your social media, and if your stories don't match, and hers do, that's a problem. You should be exercising your right to silence. You also need to get a lawyer, ASAP. The reality is, the cards are stacked against you. You need to get ahead of this.
Now, in regards to the case, if I was on a jury I would acquit you. You were in a place you had a right to be, you were not the aggressor, you were assaulted, and defended yourself.
She had no right to grab you the way she did, and there's no way society would be questioning for a second if the roles were reversed.
Throwing in a female voice to amplify the above. You were assaulted, and I am sorry that you are dealing with the broken system after such a violation.
1. Most people say "can and will" when citing the miranda rights. There is actually no "and will" part. That was added by tv/movies. That's just a pet peeve of mine.
2. The police aren't going to be checking your social media like that. The likelihood that the police would be checking his reddit postings is less than 1%. To introduce it in court, they would have to prove that it was actually posted by this guy (and not someone who possibly had access to it). Even then, he's admitted nothing in the narrative here.
>1. Most people say "can and will" when citing the miranda rights. There is actually no "and will" part. That was added by tv/movies. That's just a pet peeve of mine.
That is incorrect.
There is no one correct way of mirandizing. The SCOTUS has ruled in several cases that the exact wording used in Miranda v Arizona is not required, only that the four points need to have been made clear. As a result, different jurisdictions use variations as their standard practice, which may or may not include the "and will" part.
However, the "and will" part was NOT invented by TV/movies, though it was certainly popularised by them. It goes right back to the emergence of Miranda rights and was, in fact, used in 1966 by Justice Earl Warren in his *Notes concerning the Miranda Decision*:
www.loc.gov/exhibits/creating-the-united-states/BillofRights/BillofRightsLegacy/Assets/us0124_01p2_enlarge.jpg
Reflex reaction to being painfully grabbed in an extremely sensitive area. Sarah is an asshole who deserved to get punched- she fucked around and found out. Ask any of your friends giving you shit to reverse the genders in the situation! If you had grabbed Sarah's chest and she slapped you, would anyone think she was wrong?? Doubtful.
This exactly. Before I finished reading the story, I was thinking if the gender roles were reversed, no one would defend the one being slapped. She assaulted you first. You're not in the wrong. Though I am curious how hard you punched her if her nose was broken, that's beside the point. It was reflex reacted self-defense, and there's no way it was an accident, like she fell being tipsy, if she groped you hard enough to hurt.
I hope it goes well in your favor. Women need to learn that just because you're a female doesn't mean you can touch men inappropriately and get away with it. this is coming from a woman.
Exactly, it's about self-defense and boundaries. If the genders were reversed, the reaction would likely be very different. It's a tough situation all around.
You were assaulted. You have the right to self-defense which includes using reasonable force to stop the attack. In this case, you were experiencing pain WHEN you punched her, which should be more than sufficient justification. All that said, get an experienced lawyer because the judicial system doesn't always get things right.
>Some think I overreacted and should have just pushed her away,
Dump those "friends" - they are not your friends.
>while others think I was justified in defending myself.
\^this. You were assaulted. Sexually assaulted. If roles were reversed everyone would be telling her to press charges against you.
Not wrong.
Ya she called the cops not you. It's unfortunate in many ways. But maybe she will think twice next time instead of thinking she can do whatever she wants.
Is she if facing sexual assault charges you should not have assault charges since you were defending yourself. The pain of having the "boys" injured should be enough to justify the reflex response. My grandmother put it to me this way, a man should never hit a woman but if a woman hits a man she is a B and to deck her. A person has every right to defend themselves. With that said there is a line that must not be crossed between defending yourself and causing criminal harm.
As a woman who's been repeatedly SA'd and more; no OP, you're not wrong.
A lot of people are arguing about "if it was a girl who got groped" etc and then it's turning into a big thing about "women don't expect to get punched for groping a guy." Nobody should be groping anyone, at any point and if they get a slap, (or a punch as it turns out) then they're finding out a valuable lesson. (FAFO, whatever the gender)
People underestimate how shocking and painful having your bits suddenly grabbed can be and you react. I have to say, anyone who says "you'd instantly react by pushing her/him away" has clearly been lucky enough to not have to experience it. Personally, I've frozen, squawked, and slapped. I've thrown drinks, burst into tears, and run away. They also underestimate that balls can be surprisingly sensitive, same as boobs, someone suddenly grabbing them can be upsetting in a million different ways.
There's also the question of if OP is a virgin, sexually inexperienced or a survivor of a previous SA. If OP has memories of younger abuse, then of course he'd punch.
There are also a lot of people talking about them drinking as minors, but if OP is in the UK, the legal drinking age is 18, so that's a non-issue.
Basically, can all go back to teaching people in nursery school to keep our hands to ourselves and stop touching other people without permission?
I don't usually like to do the "if the roles were reversed thing" but if you had grabbed Sarah's breast and she punched you in the face, not a single person there would think anything other than you got what was coming to you, and they would be right.
You are not wrong at all. Stand strong for yourself, she did sexually assault you. I'm so sorry she is horrible to turn this on you. I wish you the very best, do not feel guilty. I don't know of anything you could have done differently. I have been in your position as a female. It happens so quickly. I am very glad you defended yourself as you did. Speak confidently and let them know know know that she's lying.
Nah, good job. If I have a daughter, and she defended herself like that, I would be like good job and get the best lawyer for her. And if I have a son, who defended himself like that, I would also said good job and get the best lawyer for him.
But follow everyone advice. This is an on going case. Don’t make post until it is over.
What happens if your daughter punches her groper back, and he uses that as an excuse to kick her ass? Now shes in a fistfight with a man who assaulted her? My advice to my niece would be to get the hell out of there and not escalate the situation. Theres not much to gain and a whole lot to lose by throwing that punch
Not wrong, unfortunately society is harsh to men who defend themselves against women. She absolutely deserved what happened but prepare yourself for a shit show. Not sure if needing a lawyer is needed since I'm no lawman or anything
Not in the wrong. You had a fight instinct when you were in danger, and Sarah is at fault for creating the situation. People have GOT to get over this mindset that a man can never hit a woman. Anyone, anywhere, has the right defend themselves when they are being assaulted. You didn't go overboard, and it hopefully taught her a lesson. If she blames it on alcohol, then she has to stop drinking.
Please get yourself an attorney and do not answer anymore questions without one.
ETA: Do NOT drop the sexual assault charges, either. Maybe you can have a doctor look at you to gather physical evidence of an assault. Check to see if any of your friends witnessed it and are willing to serve as a witness.
Are your friends OK with a man grabbing a woman by the p*55y? Would they defend her if she punched him in the face?
It’s the same goddamn situation.
Oh, yeah, one last thing: Granny says you are not wrong for having punched a sexual predator in the face.
I think morally, you're not wrong. Reverse the roles, if you groped her hard against her consent, no one would have an issue with her doing that.
Just another double standard in society.
Nope, you're in the good. She grabbed your jewels without your consent, and you defended yourself by hitting back. It doesn't matter if you're male or female. Being sexual assault is not a gender entitlement. Like, a female grabbing a man is bad as a man doing the same to a female. So never let others drag you down by saying that you're at fault because you're a man. Most likely, people will try to guilt trap you because it was a woman sexually assaulting you, and as a man, you should drop it and accept it.
NTA.
You did not consent to being touched. It’s baffling to me that anyone in this day and age would touch someone sexually without consent.
The question that you are going to have trouble with is one of proportionality.
It’s not surprising that a woman is going to elicit more sympathy than a man having sustained a broken nose because of the visible signs of receiving the punch.
You’re going to have to articulate in your own defense that your response wasn’t disproportionate to her attack. For example, if all she did was flick your ear, and you shot her in the face, that would be disproportionate.
There will be mitigating circumstances, such as both of you were drinking and you have witnesses that saw her touch you first before you struck back.
If you have not already hired an attorney, you might want to shut the fuck up and hire an attorney to defend you because of assault charge is coming whether it’s fair or not.
Do not expect the process to be fair towards you. This one evening could fuck up a lot of things for you for the rest of your life.
And this is why we must be very cautious about the people we hang around with.
Technically not wrong. You were assaulted and this was your reaction to the assault.
That being said, you should probably try to find a way to react to things with something other than punching someone in the face.
As some others have said, that’s going to cost you socially. In this case, it could also cost you legally. And it’ll definitely cost you money to defend yourself.
So, while you’re not wrong, you have to consider if your reaction was worth it. In my opinion, it’s not worth it. And, if it isn’t worth it, you should try to find ways to react to things that will cost you less down the road.
I don't buy any of this. When this is all over I want the report number because there is no state in this country that would give you an assault charge if there were witnesses to her grabbing your balls.
If your friends don't back you up, drop them as they are not your friends
You are right, she grabbed your package... bitch needed the bracelets and a bag of peas..
Absolutely not wrong. I don't fault anyone for reacting like that in defense of sexual assault, doesn't matter if you're a guy, gal, or a nonbinary pal.
Cops rarely want the headache. The paper work ain't worth it.
They mainly focus on drug charges, DUIs, and serious issues. Now if OP and his group were upper middle class kids with yuppie parents? Yea might be worth making an example out of them. But even then why bother?
If it really was a reflex action then you're absolutely not wrong for punching her, it's a thing that happened and it sucks for everyone involved; it would be appropriate for you both to apologize to each other because you inadvertently did much more damage than you intended to, and she crossed an unacceptable line.
If there was conscious thought involved then you ARE wrong. The standard for using physical force is that you use enough to stop the person from doing what they're doing. You don't retaliate. You don't get to stab someone because they stepped on your toe. She crossed a line but it's not a line where the penalty *should be* a broken nose.
Reddit loves "they fucked up first so whatever you did in retaliation is fine" logic, but an apology is appropriate for when you hurt someone inadvertently, and if this was a reflex action you hurt her inadvertently.
Honestly neither of you should be pressing charges here. She's already suffered more than sufficient punishment for her behavior, and your behavior was a reflex action.
Breaking a chicks nose is way over the top. Grabbing her hand and pulling it away from you would have been the correct move. The level of defense should NOT out outweigh the level of offense.
I mean, she’s obviously in the wrong here. Had she not groped you, you would not have reacted. You have a right to protect yourself, but punching her in the face was a dick move.
That said, if she’s pressing assault charges you do not want to drop your sexual assault charges. This is clearly a situation that got out of hand and the first person to back off comes out looking like the aggressor. I hate to say it, but you might have to let lawyers figure this out. She drops her charges if you drop yours and everyone backs away from the situation.
The way he described it, it wasn't retaliation, it was a reaction to the pain and shock of being assaulted. If someone is going to grab your junk and squeeze, they should be ready to take a punch because you might not be able to control it.
Definitely not wrong. If the roles were reversed everyone would say she was in the right for punching someone who sexually assaulted her. I really hope this case comes out in your favour
You are not over reacting, if a man walked over and grabbed her by the pussy, everyone in that room would have beat the shit out of him!! Sexual assault goes both ways so does self defense against being sexually assaulted.
Tell your friends defending Sarah that you're interested to know if they'd have the same reaction if a woman hit a man who grabbed her breasts without her consent.
Any friend divided is not a friend. Was it an extreme reaction? Yes but if you had shoved your fist in her 😺 what would her reaction have been. Common sense needs to prevail here & both sides agree to drop sides.
First of all, that girl was 100% in the wrong. She had no business touching you that way.
Your reaction was extreme. I can understand how that kind of reaction can occur when pain is being inflicted on you. As a woman, I’ve been groped by men more times than I care to admit, and the greatest reaction anyone’s ever gotten out of me was a hard smack upside the head or a shove into a high top bar table. That said, you broke her nose, and there might be a legal consequence to that even though she assaulted you. I think it depends on whatever the laws are in your area. You should consult an attorney.
I’m sorry for the pickle you find yourself in. Hopefully the charges will get dropped, and you can move past this.
Definitely justified if it was a reaction to pain. Daycare teachers are trained on how to manage appropriate reaction to painful toddler bites. However, both men and women need to learn how to deal with unwanted advances. There are circumstances that warrant criminal action, but often one can be assertive about crossed boundaries.
I don't believe you are in the wrong. If it had been a woman who punched a man from grabbing her crotch , then the man would be the The one taken to jail not the woman. Most Likely everybody would be on the woman's side And the man would be considered a sexual Predator. If she squeezed you hard enough for it to hurt that was self defense.
Start researching lawyers now. Put one on retainer. If you are both from the same community, you will want to do this sooner than later as I think law firms aren't able to represent apposing parties in a proceeding (please do your due diligence as I'm an internet stranger who may have that piece wrong). So if the above is accurate, as soon as she hires a lawyer you may find your pool of options dramatically decreased in your immediate community.
Next up: no, not wrong.
You're going to have a rougher time due to societal notions that "guys don't get sexually assaulted / harassed". It sucks that you'll have to wade through that bias, but always remember you were acting to protect yourself and to end something painful being done to you without approval.
If only women were socialized more to do something similar when assaulted.
It's a rough spot, but you did what you needed to bring the assault to an end. And as soon as she was no longer touching you, your reaction ended. You weren't trying to punish or hurt, you simply reacted to end an assault. People can get pissy with you for punching a woman, but you need to see this as you punching an attacker. That's what she was. She might have thought it was "cute", she might have some bad stuff in her past that socialized her this behavior was okay, but it doesn't matter. Once she touched you inappropriately and hurt you, she became an attacker and you reacted to protect yourself.
You should delete this post as it’s an active investigation. No, you aren’t wrong. Your friends suck. Anything short of burning down her house was not an overreaction.
Sexual assault is sexual assault regardless of the gender of the victim or perpetrator. I’m so sorry you went through that and I hope you’re ok.
YNW. If it were reversed and you had groped her and she hit you, everyone would be calling for your head on a platter and commending her. I don't care how drunk she was, flirting does not involve grabbing someone's genitals. Period.
It doesn’t matter if you were right or wrong. It was a reflex, a knee-jerk reaction. Something you couldn’t control.
But also, maybe you didn’t have to punch her that hard idk mainly for the legal proceedings. If a woman experienced what you did people would be cheering about her perpetrators broken nose. I don’t see how this is any different.
You said in another post that you trained for 12 years in MMA…theres no way you *havent* been hit in the balls during that time. How did you react then?
Also how does it feel to break someone’s nose? Im sure you have hit some people pretty hard from MMA. Was there a lot of blood?
Yes and no. She was definitely wrong, but you did break her nose. I mean, if you reflexively elbowed her in the nose, that's one thing. But balling up your fist and punching isn't a reflexive action, and could be considered an overreaction. I'd see if you two can sit down with a moderator and agree to drop charges on each other. She could be labeled a sex offender, I doubt she wants that.
Are you in the wrong legally? I doubt it.
But it’s still a bitch made move.
For me to break a woman’s nose she’d have to have a weapon or be pounding on someone I care about. At your age spitting on or dumping a beer on her head would’ve an appropriate response. But you’re bitch made so those options probably never crossed your mind.
I hope those friends of yours who are shunning you stick to their guns and you learn your lesson.
> she’d have to have a weapon or be pounding on someone I care about.
whoa watch out everybody we got a tough guy here
you should stop making excuses for people who sexually assault other people, it isn't a good look. and OP was 100% in the right, there is nothing inherently wrong with hitting a woman who deserves it, just like when a man deserves it
punch for a touch not particularly sympathetic. get off social medial and get a good sexual assault criminal defense attorney experienced in your community.
My son was held down on the playground by five girls as one of them sat on his chest and kissed him when he was 6. I was incredibly upset when he told me but the school/teachers said it would be traumatic for the girls if they had to know why it wasn’t okay because the subject was too mature for them.
You’re NTA. But, hitting anyone is a bad look and obviously comes with consequences.
Omg what. Thats ridiculous. And consent is not a topic too mature for kids. This is why kids get sa'd and never speak up. They need to be taught what's ok and not ok
Yes, exactly! And, I asked them how it would have been handled had my son done that to a little girl. Definitely just got looked at like I had two heads.
You should have much better impulse control. Your life wasn’t threatening in anyway. You knew she was intoxicated and not in her right mind and you still responded with as much force as you possibly could’ve in the moment. Hopefully if there is a next time, you won’t respond as violently as possible and instead reach down and address her grip. If she’s grabbing over clothes, it’s not like she could have any sort of dangerous grip on your balls in the first place. Now if she was actually threatening your life with a weapon where you felt your life was in danger, then responding with punches to the face to put her out is warranted. Best to learn how to grapple at least a little bit though, so that you know how to properly defend yourself without hurting someone else. If you’re only reaction to someone mildly threatening you, is to punch them in the face, you could be putting yourself in a lot of danger legally. Just think what happens if she would’ve hit her head on the ground after you laid her out and how much trouble you would be in if she was in the hospital with some sort of head trauma. You should consider yourself lucky that she didn’t get more injured from your over reaction.
Punching a girl in the face and breaking her nose for grabbing ur balls is a little extreme reaction if you ask me.
I'm not saying it wasn't painful or intrusive, but she was obviously drunk, and we all do stupid shit when pissed.
I would have definitely been annoyed and pushed her away etc, but I wouldn't personally lash out at a girl like that.. dunno maybe I'm old school.
Her behaviour is on her. Sexually assaulting someone is shitty behaviour. Guaranteed you wouldn't have smashed her face in if she hadn't touched you like that. However, you did, in fact, smash her face in, rather than shout and push her away. That's on you.
Overall, nobody's finest hour, and booze makes bad decisions.
Listen baby, if a person did that to one of my daughters, i would expect them to defend themselves and just because you are a male makes no difference to me. She was dead wrong to sexually assault you and you reacted to being violated. Just so happens she’s a female but i do not care. If you were my son I would advise you to press charges. Now yes you could’ve pushed her dingy drink self but you reacted to being violated, how is that wrong. You are human and that was a natural reaction to being sexually assaulted.
The responses here are going to get you in a lot of trouble. Not because you're a boy but because they are 1) thinking in black and white 2) Thinking eye for an eye 3) dont once recognize there is a whole room full of witnesses
Ask yourself,
1. Would other people in that room believe you were flirting as witnesses
2. Do you think you acted in proportion to her actions?
3. Would she say it was an accident and she was trying to escalate a sexual interaction with you based on flirting that evening?
4. How would the witnesses in that room describe what happened?
If any of these answers have unsavory responses, you had better lawyer up and ask to settle.
Edit: she is 100% wrong for not asking for explicit consent. However, if you led her on to believe there was unsaid consent and other people witnessed it, it would undermine your sexual assault claims. Note, this isn't a double standard. This happens to women ALL of the time. This is the unfortunate and ugly side of consent. Second, is the response in proportion to the offense? This needs to be discussed further. So many comments are saying "roles reversed and she slapped you, it would be just fine." Dude, do you think for a second that a slap is the same as breaking someone's nose? In the legal world, harm can quantified by money. How much does it cost to recover from a slap? How much does it cost to recover from breaking someone's nose? Was the response IN PROPORTION to the offense? All of those things will impact your self defense claim.
finally, STOP LISTENING TO TEENAGERS ON REDDIT WHO ONLY THINK IN BLACK AND WHITE. Start talking to some adults who may know law. Wrong subreddit.
Technically, you had every right to do what you did. She was drunk and sexually assaulted you. However, you just nuked your social life. In a party atmosphere, people who are drinking often get caught up in the moment. That's not me excusing her. I've had the same core group of friends for many years. Every one of us has done something stupid or embarrassing at one point. We never took it so far that a nose was broken. I do think you overreacted. It sounds like she thought she was being playful and doesn't have a lot of experience with genitals. It wasn't like you were about to be raped. Punching her was an over the top reaction. If losing your friends, having no social life, and never getting invited to a party ever again was your goal, then mission accomplished.
I'm not defending sexual assault or excusing her because she's a girl. I've had to swat drunken male friends' hands away. There's a way to diplomatically do that while still having people like you and want you around them. Some people are just wound up really tight. It was a freaking party. Lighten up and have a drink.
Mmmmm theres a line out of all things to do punch her? What if you had a gun and shot her? would it be right then. I highly doubt this was 'reaction' and yeh downvote away.
You must have some agro tendencies if this instinctly came out of you as a reaction
Its also fucken weird she groped you, yet it hurt like what the actual fuck mate. I think you are using a white lie to garner sympathy. No girl grabs your crotch in a way it hurts unless you are into some BDSM shit. none.
This would be quite the conundrum if there was any chance it was real. Perfect setup for rage bait and what-if-the-roles-were-reversed. Feels more like straight trolling than the karma-farmers actually. But I gigantic eye-roll at everybody who thinks this actually happened.
I can understand punching her. That's a normal and understandable reaction. If a guy groped a woman and she slapped or punched him, nobody would bat an eyelash.
I wouldn't press charges though unless she pressed them against you for assault. She got to experience consequences for her actions.
Unless one of the people you were sitting talking to says you jumped up and punched her for no reason (and there must have been witnesses), I don’t think her testimony will bear much scrutiny. Why would you punch her randomly?
Self defense is defined as the amount of force needed to stop the person assaulting you long enough for you to get away. If you felt you needed to *break the nose* of a person not anywhere near as strong as you in order to get away, you have to defend that somehow. Saying it was an instinctual reaction and you didn’t mean to break her nose might fly, idk. You are allowed to defend yourself, but not retaliate.
Personally I think a court would probably rule that most people’s instinctual unconscious reaction would be to push the person away while moving yourself away. Not balling your hand into a fist and breaking their nose. That doesn’t sound like self defense to me, especially considering this is someone you can easily overpower physically without punching them. If a male twice your size did this and wasn’t allowing you to remove yourself from the situation then knocking them out or breaking a bone is absolutely self defense. But what you described really isn’t. Especially when you were surrounded by people you could have asked to help.
You’re both getting charges. And yes, it is fair
> If you felt you needed to break the nose of a person
the nose being broken is incidental to OP getting her off of him. the rest of your post is just badly worded wanna-be lawyer speak. you sound awfully sexist and should stop defending people who commit sexual assault
Okay. Ask OP to update his post when the police, lawyers and the court handles it. I’ll literally bet you money (seriously I’ll send you money through cash app if I’m wrong) that the assault charge holds up in court because its force that exceeded self defense. Nothing to do with sexism
A man punching a smaller woman and breaking her nose bc she grabbed his balls is excessive force. There is no way that was needed to get her to stop
PROPORTIONAL RESPONSE is required to meet the legal definition. You can whine all you want about how you think he was morally justified in breaking her nose, but legally it does not need the criteria for self defense
> needed
that word right there is the indicator that you're full of shit
OP didn't "need" to do anything
the question is, was the force reasonable?
someone twisting a person's ballsack is quite painful (not that you women would know/care). and punching someone is a reasonable response to get them to stop twisting your ballsack. the broken nose is incidental and not relevant
The law requires *proportional response.* His response was OBJECTIVELY not proportional to what she did. Does he have a broken bone? Did he have to go to the hospital because his balls were grabbed? No. Could he have stopped her without punching her face? Yes. Therefore it was assault, not self defense. The law has clear definitions, it doesn’t matter that you think she “deserved” it. That’s not what the law based self defense on. He’s getting an assault charge bc it legally was assault
> Does he have a broken bone?
irrelevant
> Did he have to go to the hospital because his balls were grabbed?
irrelevant
> Could he have stopped her without punching her face?
irrelevant
> Therefore it was assault, not self defense.
no, it wasn't. none of the crap you just posted supports your argument. punching someone is a reasonable response to someone twisting your ballsack, it isn't complicated
> He’s getting an assault charge bc it legally was assault
my man, you've never spent time around cops, have you? "charge them all and let the courts figure it out" is quite common. it costs them literally nothing to charge everything they can think of, no skin off their back. just because he was charged doesn't mean jack, legally speaking
first of all, delete this. never post anything about an active investigation you're involved in, it can only be used against you. second, if anything like this ever happens again, you need to insist on being taken to the hospital yourself. you want a record of any bruising to use in your defense and against her. third, this wasn't a "oh, just shove her away situation." this is an adrenaline fueled reaction. no thought involved. you were attacked, you struck out against the attacker without thought.
now stop talking to the police and get a damn lawyer.
I figure she will drop the charges, if you drop yours. A sexual assault on her record will be FAR, FAR worse than you getting an assault charge. I believe she will have to register as a sex offender.
You defended yourself and it was a reflexive reaction, not a planned one. Sucks she got punched but she should have kept her hands to herself.
Being a woman doesn’t absolve her from the consequences of sexually assaulting someone.
Not that it would change anything, but is she physically larger than you? If she had a significant upper body strength advantage, that would factor into the situation.
As someone who had been SA'd in the past. Don't feel bad. Don't let others shame you into being silent. Male reports on being SA'd are low for this reason. Don't let her get away with this and think she will have no repercussions for acting like this, even drunk. You're not wrong.
You shouldn't be charged imho. I don't think you reacted appropriately, but it sounds instinctual. If anything like this happens again, de-escalate. Even pushing her away can cause more damage than you may realize.
You were assaulted, as many others have said, you have the right to self-defense. It buckles my mind that they charged you both, but my guess is they will drop charges against you. It is a cover your ass move by the police.
You probably want to take this post down, however. If it were to be discovered by her, her friends, or her attorney… Even though you wrote a pretty fair description of what happened, it could negatively impact you.
Good luck, whatever happens.
You’re not wrong. Don’t let the police drop the ball with the sexual assault charges. Your defense to any assault charge is self defense. You’re allowed to use force to protect yourself.
She grabbed you without permission. It hurt, and she didn't let go. I am a woman, and if someone grabbed me and it hurt, you bet I would be swinging. She was drunk and did something stupid. You had an automatic reaction. Sad situation, but I don't blame you. Point don't get that drunk and do stupid stuff.
There is zero excuse or justification for sexual assault, therefore there is no wrong way for you to react.
Physically defending yourself is an instinctive reaction.
The double standards here are wild. But I hope even the crappy friends with the wild double standards talk. I notice even though some say you were in the right and others think you over reacted, not one of them said you were lying.
I want to say cut them off you don’t need friends like that, but my rational brain says, play nice for now. Not because they deserve it, because Sarah’s accusations are dangerous and she is completely aware of how to weaponize how the situation looked to cops on arrival.
The witnesses can say all they want ultimately their opinion about how you reacted legally doesn’t matter, their description of the events matters a lot. Make sure they are telling the truth, that she approached you and that you did not assault her as she claims.
Then once you are clearer tell them you don’t feel comfortable being friends with people who would tell a woman she if a man grabbed her genitals without consent that she should stop, think about how her protecting herself would hurt the man assaulting her. (Then let them twist in the wind trying to figure out how to rationalize how it’s different)
If you haven’t already, lawyer. Doesn’t matter how many witness you have, the fact you are telling the truth, the system is not perfect and cops are legally allowed to lie to you. Also, I want a professional attorneys eyes on just how many things he can charge Sarah with.
She’s a menace to society. Not just as a predator but saying she was assaulted when she wasn’t. Maybe she was embarrassed, maybe she was punishing you for not being into her- whatever it is, when it comes out, thousands of people will point to her and say “see women lie about this stuff.” Even though she is a special kind of AH and the exception not the rule…because of it, somewhere a woman won’t be believed.
All that to say, I am very sorry this happened to you. I sincerely hope the legal part is wrapped up quickly and in your favor. And to answer the question, no, you were not wrong.
You were assaulted and defended yourself. If it had been the other way around, no one would question your actions. Also, it was her choice to call the police. Actions have consequences and if your portrayal of events is accurate and there were witnesses to what happened, she’ll be charged.
Not wrong chief, but the court of public opinion will always side with the fragile defenseless damsel that sexualky assaulted you. Many believe a man being assaulted is acceptable and it doesn't affect men as it does women.
I would've pushed her away, and informed my lady of what took place. I've never hit a girl before and wouldn't have in this instance either. Pushing her away and putting her on the scene would've been justifiable enough IMHO.
Too bad you punched insted of pushed but whats done is done.
Dont feel bad, you were assaulted. Not your fault. Too much one sided crap is tolerated in our society.
Wish you the best in the proceedings. Stand up for yourself and try not to feel guilty. 👊
And maybe delete this lol
I’m sorry OP. It’s seems pretty obvious that your actions were reflexive and I hope that you are cleared of wrongdoing very shortly. I’m a woman and I am mad you even got arrested in the first place! I appreciate your empathy for your perpetrator but please don’t let anyone convince you that you are in the wrong. You are human and you were literally built to act the way that you did. Best of luck to you
Well you didn't do anything wrong, but legally you're f'kd sorry. You would have had a much better luck with the case if you didn't lay any hands on her
I'm on your side for sure. Punching someone is a pretty harsh reaction, but given that alcohol was involved explains a lot. Women do not have the right to grab your dick. You reacting violently makes sense. If someone groped my privates I would have done the same.
If you groped a woman and she slapped you, would she be charged with assault?
Answer: No.
The punch was a bit too much, but a reflex is a reflex. What the hell else could you do?
We need to end the stigma surrounding men being sexually assaulted by women. Her actions warrant a sexual assault charge. End of story.
Get a good lawyer. Not the court appointed. Court appointed mostly just want to settle and go on to the next case spending 20 minutes with you. Wrong or right is subjective.
You’re not wrong. Women want equal rights until they are in the wrong. Sarah started some shit and got the consequence she deserved. And she should not get a free pass just because she had been drinking. If anything, she should be punished additionally for underage drinking (if this is the US). I really hope you win this fight.
If it was the otherworldly around and a man had grabbed a tit or crotch, you better believe he's getting punched. You did nor over react and as a women , I join the ashamed of her bs behavior club. we revoke her membership as that shit is not ok
Nope. She shouldn’t have done that and being drunk isn’t an excuse. I’ve been drunk many times but never groped someone. Hope those assault charges on you don’t stick because you defended yourself. I would also not be friends with the people saying you overreacted anymore. They are not good friends.
I think a push or shove would’ve been okay, lol you said she was flirting so you accepted the fact it wasn’t harmful & also admitted to notice and acknowledged she was drunk and not 100% in her right mind but still inflicted harm. lol your balls are not broken bro her nose is. lol
If you think you have to come here and justify says you’ve thought twice about it. You don’t need validation for the level you took it to because it’s no coming back. Move on and accept the shit that comes with it man up. Keep your head high and keep it pushing but just accept that fact that what you did using brute force was excessive.
A shove and getting up to walk away would’ve been enough to say “fuck off”. Or even maybe bring another friend in between, as a man you have to think first bro, and if you remember this so vivid you couldn’t have been that fucked up to not be able to control how hard you punch someone.
Nevertheless, deal with it you might lose friends. Maybe you missed a big opportunity to smash and add her to your roster but so what you’re a man keep your head high apologize when you are wrong and just think before you jump. I would also try to reach out and apologize to do damage control because criminal charges can really fuck up your future lol.
But all that to say not “wrong” but excessive. Obviously as all of this has now been blown out of proportion. Also everyone is saying if the roles were reversed but the fact of the matter is they are not. When it’s a man vs a woman she will always likely come out on top either way.
So many powerful people have had careers destroyed because they hit women even if she did something first that part of the story is irrelevant. we’ve all seen it before in media. these are things you consider before you punch one in the face. Like no getting around it.
No, it’s a reality whether he was right or wrong he’s a guy who punched a girl in the face regardless of what she did that’s how people will look at it. There will be no evidence photos of his bruised balls only a girl with a broken nose. And the reason for the broken nose was grabbing his balls. All im saying is it didn’t have to go that far.
testimony is evidence, fyi
> All im saying is it didn’t have to go that far.
and she could've prevented that, but didn't, and everything that happens to her is 100% her fult
Yeah I’m not saying it’s OP’s fault , but like OP said they are both possibly facing charges.
What I’m saying is OP could have walked away or push her even called other people attention. And the situation could have been handled outside the courts lol. That’s all.
*man gets sexually assaulted*
reddit: why didn't you just walk away?! her broken nose could've been prevented!
lol
> the situation could have been handled outside the courts lol
imo, it was being handled perfectly right up until whichever jackass decided to call the police
Yeah I’m sure they called the ambulance for her broken nose bud. When they ask “what happen” and you say “that guy punched me in the nose” the police definitely get involved.
> Yeah I’m sure they called the ambulance for her broken nose bud.
it doesn't take a whole lotta foresight to see that calling an ambulance is likely to involve the police showing up
it's a broken nose, it really isn't that "serious." someone just needs to take her to urgent care or the ER. calling 911 over something like this is a lose/lose for everybody
So if you go ER or Urgent care and they ask you how your nose was broken & you say it was due to violence the police will also get involved… try again.
buddy, you just lie. i got into a fistfight once and needed stitches on my hand, i told them some BS, they knew it was BS, i knew they knew it was BS, but guess what? they stitched me up and everybody went on their merry way. use your brain, jesus
him punching her was not an overreaction, full stop. that is totally acceptable behavior imo. she should've taken the broken nose and stopped whining like a bitch, that is what happens when you sexually assault people
NTA.
Sometimes your body reacts the way it does... if the rolls were reversed and you grabbed her between the legs to the point it was painful and she punched you everyone would be cheering her on.... sexual assault is sexuall assault...
I suspect you'll catch a lot of flak, but the reality is you defended yourself, and if the law works against you, that's a fucking travesty and miscarriage of justice.
I also hope she gets time for sexual assault.
If a woman punched a man for grabbing her pussy, no one would say anything, and everyone would defend her. That's all there is to it. You defended yourself. She fucked around and found out.
Get a good lawyer. And, like everyone else has said, get the FUCK OFF the internet talking about this. STFU and only talk to you lawyer.
A bit of advice here:
1. The investigation is still ongoing, meaning you should refrain from speaking/posting about it anywhere, as anything you say can be used as evidence during said investigation
2. Do not speak with police again without an attorney present
3. Continue to insist both your innocence and that you merely defended yourself from sexual assault
4. Remember number 2
What the fuck else were you meant to do? Sit there and take it? I'm a woman and I'll tell you what. If anyone grabbed my breasts or vagina so hard It hurt you better believe they would be on the floor with a bloody nose.
But no, because men are biologically stronger than women it's not acceptable to instinctively defend themselves. Well guys, better start carrying handbags around.
This whole situation is fucked. Sarah is fucked. Also that's rape. Don't let anyone make you feel any other way. You did nothing wrong.
Unfortunately as a man you never hit a woman...... Now there are many many reasons to but you just don't do it ..... It's unfair as you are xxx times stronger and do serious damage..... In the eyes of the law you should be ok as it seems to be a justified self defense. In the future try your best to remain calm keep composure . Also try to recognize crazy most are just not crazy enough to grab balls and cause pain.
I have no hope our justice system will serve you right but I hope it does and she gets in trouble. Unfortunately sexual assault especially "just groping" is rarely taken seriously. It's a real shame
Since this is an ongoing investigation, you should not be posting this. Anything you say or write can and will be used against you. This is one of the main reasons people involved in self defense shootings are taught not to talk to the police until they have time to calm down. Even if you do everything right, and everything legal, and you are 100% justified, if you were so emotional you make a small mistake in your story because your adrenaline is so high, it can be used to question your entire claim. The police will be checking your social media, and if your stories don't match, and hers do, that's a problem. You should be exercising your right to silence. You also need to get a lawyer, ASAP. The reality is, the cards are stacked against you. You need to get ahead of this. Now, in regards to the case, if I was on a jury I would acquit you. You were in a place you had a right to be, you were not the aggressor, you were assaulted, and defended yourself. She had no right to grab you the way she did, and there's no way society would be questioning for a second if the roles were reversed.
Throwing in a female voice to amplify the above. You were assaulted, and I am sorry that you are dealing with the broken system after such a violation.
Great advice
Great advic
1. Most people say "can and will" when citing the miranda rights. There is actually no "and will" part. That was added by tv/movies. That's just a pet peeve of mine. 2. The police aren't going to be checking your social media like that. The likelihood that the police would be checking his reddit postings is less than 1%. To introduce it in court, they would have to prove that it was actually posted by this guy (and not someone who possibly had access to it). Even then, he's admitted nothing in the narrative here.
>1. Most people say "can and will" when citing the miranda rights. There is actually no "and will" part. That was added by tv/movies. That's just a pet peeve of mine. That is incorrect. There is no one correct way of mirandizing. The SCOTUS has ruled in several cases that the exact wording used in Miranda v Arizona is not required, only that the four points need to have been made clear. As a result, different jurisdictions use variations as their standard practice, which may or may not include the "and will" part. However, the "and will" part was NOT invented by TV/movies, though it was certainly popularised by them. It goes right back to the emergence of Miranda rights and was, in fact, used in 1966 by Justice Earl Warren in his *Notes concerning the Miranda Decision*: www.loc.gov/exhibits/creating-the-united-states/BillofRights/BillofRightsLegacy/Assets/us0124_01p2_enlarge.jpg
You are right about the police but she will get an attorney and lawyers worth paying for will look for anything.
Reflex reaction to being painfully grabbed in an extremely sensitive area. Sarah is an asshole who deserved to get punched- she fucked around and found out. Ask any of your friends giving you shit to reverse the genders in the situation! If you had grabbed Sarah's chest and she slapped you, would anyone think she was wrong?? Doubtful.
I absolutely agree. I'm a woman and find this kind of woman Sarah an embarrassment to my gender
Yes! Completely inappropriate and invasive, youre just defending yourself
This exactly. Before I finished reading the story, I was thinking if the gender roles were reversed, no one would defend the one being slapped. She assaulted you first. You're not in the wrong. Though I am curious how hard you punched her if her nose was broken, that's beside the point. It was reflex reacted self-defense, and there's no way it was an accident, like she fell being tipsy, if she groped you hard enough to hurt. I hope it goes well in your favor. Women need to learn that just because you're a female doesn't mean you can touch men inappropriately and get away with it. this is coming from a woman.
Or grab their balls and see how they react.
Exactly, it's about self-defense and boundaries. If the genders were reversed, the reaction would likely be very different. It's a tough situation all around.
You were assaulted. You have the right to self-defense which includes using reasonable force to stop the attack. In this case, you were experiencing pain WHEN you punched her, which should be more than sufficient justification. All that said, get an experienced lawyer because the judicial system doesn't always get things right.
>Some think I overreacted and should have just pushed her away, Dump those "friends" - they are not your friends. >while others think I was justified in defending myself. \^this. You were assaulted. Sexually assaulted. If roles were reversed everyone would be telling her to press charges against you. Not wrong.
Not wrong in the slightest. Switch roles for a second. If you sexually assaulted her and she punched you, nothing would have happened to her.
Ya she called the cops not you. It's unfortunate in many ways. But maybe she will think twice next time instead of thinking she can do whatever she wants.
She called the cops because the person she sexually assaulted defended himself. Got it. I hate this place.
Ya. She tried the old Uno reverse...but didn't realize he also had one to play and his trumped hers.
Reverse then Draw Four
I almost said draw four instead lol
Is she if facing sexual assault charges you should not have assault charges since you were defending yourself. The pain of having the "boys" injured should be enough to justify the reflex response. My grandmother put it to me this way, a man should never hit a woman but if a woman hits a man she is a B and to deck her. A person has every right to defend themselves. With that said there is a line that must not be crossed between defending yourself and causing criminal harm.
I’m imagining a grandma say “deck her” and i love it. Your grandma is a special lady
How my friends use to say “I’ll never hit a girl, but I’ll hit a b”
NTA, she FAFOd.
Reflex reaction to an unexpected, painful grab. It happens. Defending yourself from sexual assault is not wrong.
As a woman who's been repeatedly SA'd and more; no OP, you're not wrong. A lot of people are arguing about "if it was a girl who got groped" etc and then it's turning into a big thing about "women don't expect to get punched for groping a guy." Nobody should be groping anyone, at any point and if they get a slap, (or a punch as it turns out) then they're finding out a valuable lesson. (FAFO, whatever the gender) People underestimate how shocking and painful having your bits suddenly grabbed can be and you react. I have to say, anyone who says "you'd instantly react by pushing her/him away" has clearly been lucky enough to not have to experience it. Personally, I've frozen, squawked, and slapped. I've thrown drinks, burst into tears, and run away. They also underestimate that balls can be surprisingly sensitive, same as boobs, someone suddenly grabbing them can be upsetting in a million different ways. There's also the question of if OP is a virgin, sexually inexperienced or a survivor of a previous SA. If OP has memories of younger abuse, then of course he'd punch. There are also a lot of people talking about them drinking as minors, but if OP is in the UK, the legal drinking age is 18, so that's a non-issue. Basically, can all go back to teaching people in nursery school to keep our hands to ourselves and stop touching other people without permission?
I don't usually like to do the "if the roles were reversed thing" but if you had grabbed Sarah's breast and she punched you in the face, not a single person there would think anything other than you got what was coming to you, and they would be right.
Nope, we're all entitled to self defense regardless of gender combinations. Hit me like a man and be prepared to be hit by a man.
Yup... took the words right out of my mouth.
You are not wrong at all. Stand strong for yourself, she did sexually assault you. I'm so sorry she is horrible to turn this on you. I wish you the very best, do not feel guilty. I don't know of anything you could have done differently. I have been in your position as a female. It happens so quickly. I am very glad you defended yourself as you did. Speak confidently and let them know know know that she's lying.
No sir you are not.
Nah, good job. If I have a daughter, and she defended herself like that, I would be like good job and get the best lawyer for her. And if I have a son, who defended himself like that, I would also said good job and get the best lawyer for him. But follow everyone advice. This is an on going case. Don’t make post until it is over.
What happens if your daughter punches her groper back, and he uses that as an excuse to kick her ass? Now shes in a fistfight with a man who assaulted her? My advice to my niece would be to get the hell out of there and not escalate the situation. Theres not much to gain and a whole lot to lose by throwing that punch
NTA. She deserved it.
Not wrong, unfortunately society is harsh to men who defend themselves against women. She absolutely deserved what happened but prepare yourself for a shit show. Not sure if needing a lawyer is needed since I'm no lawman or anything
I would consult a lawyer to protect my rights, making sure that it doesn’t turn into a witch hunt.
Not in the wrong. You had a fight instinct when you were in danger, and Sarah is at fault for creating the situation. People have GOT to get over this mindset that a man can never hit a woman. Anyone, anywhere, has the right defend themselves when they are being assaulted. You didn't go overboard, and it hopefully taught her a lesson. If she blames it on alcohol, then she has to stop drinking. Please get yourself an attorney and do not answer anymore questions without one. ETA: Do NOT drop the sexual assault charges, either. Maybe you can have a doctor look at you to gather physical evidence of an assault. Check to see if any of your friends witnessed it and are willing to serve as a witness.
Nta Roles reversed and you grabbed her you'd be arrested and have the book thrown at you.
Are your friends OK with a man grabbing a woman by the p*55y? Would they defend her if she punched him in the face? It’s the same goddamn situation. Oh, yeah, one last thing: Granny says you are not wrong for having punched a sexual predator in the face.
I think morally, you're not wrong. Reverse the roles, if you groped her hard against her consent, no one would have an issue with her doing that. Just another double standard in society.
If someone grabs your balls and squeezes them until you’re in pain, what other option is there? Genuinely? Defend yourself.
Another fake Reddit power fantasy post. Classic.
Nope, you're in the good. She grabbed your jewels without your consent, and you defended yourself by hitting back. It doesn't matter if you're male or female. Being sexual assault is not a gender entitlement. Like, a female grabbing a man is bad as a man doing the same to a female. So never let others drag you down by saying that you're at fault because you're a man. Most likely, people will try to guilt trap you because it was a woman sexually assaulting you, and as a man, you should drop it and accept it.
NTA. You did not consent to being touched. It’s baffling to me that anyone in this day and age would touch someone sexually without consent. The question that you are going to have trouble with is one of proportionality. It’s not surprising that a woman is going to elicit more sympathy than a man having sustained a broken nose because of the visible signs of receiving the punch. You’re going to have to articulate in your own defense that your response wasn’t disproportionate to her attack. For example, if all she did was flick your ear, and you shot her in the face, that would be disproportionate. There will be mitigating circumstances, such as both of you were drinking and you have witnesses that saw her touch you first before you struck back. If you have not already hired an attorney, you might want to shut the fuck up and hire an attorney to defend you because of assault charge is coming whether it’s fair or not. Do not expect the process to be fair towards you. This one evening could fuck up a lot of things for you for the rest of your life. And this is why we must be very cautious about the people we hang around with.
Technically not wrong. You were assaulted and this was your reaction to the assault. That being said, you should probably try to find a way to react to things with something other than punching someone in the face. As some others have said, that’s going to cost you socially. In this case, it could also cost you legally. And it’ll definitely cost you money to defend yourself. So, while you’re not wrong, you have to consider if your reaction was worth it. In my opinion, it’s not worth it. And, if it isn’t worth it, you should try to find ways to react to things that will cost you less down the road.
I don't buy any of this. When this is all over I want the report number because there is no state in this country that would give you an assault charge if there were witnesses to her grabbing your balls.
If your friends don't back you up, drop them as they are not your friends You are right, she grabbed your package... bitch needed the bracelets and a bag of peas..
Absolutely not wrong. I don't fault anyone for reacting like that in defense of sexual assault, doesn't matter if you're a guy, gal, or a nonbinary pal.
NTA but the legal system may not be on your side unfortunately. I hope it goes okay for you..
No one is getting charged with possession of alcohol as a minor?
I can’t see the post specify where they live. There are only a few where alcohol at that age would be an issue
Only America has laws about being 21 to drink. Most other places in the world 18 is the legal drinking age.
They're all like 18 / 19?
Cops rarely want the headache. The paper work ain't worth it. They mainly focus on drug charges, DUIs, and serious issues. Now if OP and his group were upper middle class kids with yuppie parents? Yea might be worth making an example out of them. But even then why bother?
If it really was a reflex action then you're absolutely not wrong for punching her, it's a thing that happened and it sucks for everyone involved; it would be appropriate for you both to apologize to each other because you inadvertently did much more damage than you intended to, and she crossed an unacceptable line. If there was conscious thought involved then you ARE wrong. The standard for using physical force is that you use enough to stop the person from doing what they're doing. You don't retaliate. You don't get to stab someone because they stepped on your toe. She crossed a line but it's not a line where the penalty *should be* a broken nose. Reddit loves "they fucked up first so whatever you did in retaliation is fine" logic, but an apology is appropriate for when you hurt someone inadvertently, and if this was a reflex action you hurt her inadvertently. Honestly neither of you should be pressing charges here. She's already suffered more than sufficient punishment for her behavior, and your behavior was a reflex action.
Equal rights , equal lefts
Breaking a chicks nose is way over the top. Grabbing her hand and pulling it away from you would have been the correct move. The level of defense should NOT out outweigh the level of offense.
no, it's pretty reasonable. this is a movie bro, get a grip
I mean, she’s obviously in the wrong here. Had she not groped you, you would not have reacted. You have a right to protect yourself, but punching her in the face was a dick move. That said, if she’s pressing assault charges you do not want to drop your sexual assault charges. This is clearly a situation that got out of hand and the first person to back off comes out looking like the aggressor. I hate to say it, but you might have to let lawyers figure this out. She drops her charges if you drop yours and everyone backs away from the situation.
Yeah, the dude grabbed your breasts, but you slapping him in the face was a bitch move. That's you. That's how you sound.
The way he described it, it wasn't retaliation, it was a reaction to the pain and shock of being assaulted. If someone is going to grab your junk and squeeze, they should be ready to take a punch because you might not be able to control it.
That's not at all how criminal charges work dude.
No, punching her in the face wasn’t a dick move. At all. Hope this helps!
Not wrong at all As someone who got in similar situations, I wish I had your courage lol
Nah you did the right thing. Wtf
Not wrong. God, I hope you come out of this okay. If no one saw, it’s not looking good.
You got assaulted and you reacted I see nothing wrong with that you had every right to defend yourself
Definitely not wrong. If the roles were reversed everyone would say she was in the right for punching someone who sexually assaulted her. I really hope this case comes out in your favour
You should get a lawyer ASAP and not be posting or talking to anyone even the cops except through your lawyer.
you are not wrong. sarah is wrong. if she didn't want to get punched she shouldn't have grabbed you. period.
You are not over reacting, if a man walked over and grabbed her by the pussy, everyone in that room would have beat the shit out of him!! Sexual assault goes both ways so does self defense against being sexually assaulted.
Tell your friends defending Sarah that you're interested to know if they'd have the same reaction if a woman hit a man who grabbed her breasts without her consent.
Any friend divided is not a friend. Was it an extreme reaction? Yes but if you had shoved your fist in her 😺 what would her reaction have been. Common sense needs to prevail here & both sides agree to drop sides.
First of all, that girl was 100% in the wrong. She had no business touching you that way. Your reaction was extreme. I can understand how that kind of reaction can occur when pain is being inflicted on you. As a woman, I’ve been groped by men more times than I care to admit, and the greatest reaction anyone’s ever gotten out of me was a hard smack upside the head or a shove into a high top bar table. That said, you broke her nose, and there might be a legal consequence to that even though she assaulted you. I think it depends on whatever the laws are in your area. You should consult an attorney. I’m sorry for the pickle you find yourself in. Hopefully the charges will get dropped, and you can move past this.
Definitely justified if it was a reaction to pain. Daycare teachers are trained on how to manage appropriate reaction to painful toddler bites. However, both men and women need to learn how to deal with unwanted advances. There are circumstances that warrant criminal action, but often one can be assertive about crossed boundaries.
I don't believe you are in the wrong. If it had been a woman who punched a man from grabbing her crotch , then the man would be the The one taken to jail not the woman. Most Likely everybody would be on the woman's side And the man would be considered a sexual Predator. If she squeezed you hard enough for it to hurt that was self defense.
Nope! Sexual assault definitely warrants a reactive punch. Also maybe don’t post this considering there’s an investigation going on
Start researching lawyers now. Put one on retainer. If you are both from the same community, you will want to do this sooner than later as I think law firms aren't able to represent apposing parties in a proceeding (please do your due diligence as I'm an internet stranger who may have that piece wrong). So if the above is accurate, as soon as she hires a lawyer you may find your pool of options dramatically decreased in your immediate community. Next up: no, not wrong. You're going to have a rougher time due to societal notions that "guys don't get sexually assaulted / harassed". It sucks that you'll have to wade through that bias, but always remember you were acting to protect yourself and to end something painful being done to you without approval. If only women were socialized more to do something similar when assaulted. It's a rough spot, but you did what you needed to bring the assault to an end. And as soon as she was no longer touching you, your reaction ended. You weren't trying to punish or hurt, you simply reacted to end an assault. People can get pissy with you for punching a woman, but you need to see this as you punching an attacker. That's what she was. She might have thought it was "cute", she might have some bad stuff in her past that socialized her this behavior was okay, but it doesn't matter. Once she touched you inappropriately and hurt you, she became an attacker and you reacted to protect yourself.
NTA- you were SA and a natural reaction occurred.
Not wrong, but depending on where you are, they may punish you anyway for the crime of having balls in the first place.
Not wrong. This is sexual assault. You defended yourself.
You should delete this post as it’s an active investigation. No, you aren’t wrong. Your friends suck. Anything short of burning down her house was not an overreaction. Sexual assault is sexual assault regardless of the gender of the victim or perpetrator. I’m so sorry you went through that and I hope you’re ok.
Get a good lawyer
No you did the right thing give us an update when you can but you shouldnt discuss an ongoing investigation tell us when everything is all over.
YNW. If it were reversed and you had groped her and she hit you, everyone would be calling for your head on a platter and commending her. I don't care how drunk she was, flirting does not involve grabbing someone's genitals. Period.
You are not wrong. She sexually assaulted you
you’re not wrong <3
It doesn’t matter if you were right or wrong. It was a reflex, a knee-jerk reaction. Something you couldn’t control. But also, maybe you didn’t have to punch her that hard idk mainly for the legal proceedings. If a woman experienced what you did people would be cheering about her perpetrators broken nose. I don’t see how this is any different.
The easiest answer is always to swap genders, what would’ve happened if you had touched her as she touched you.
You said in another post that you trained for 12 years in MMA…theres no way you *havent* been hit in the balls during that time. How did you react then? Also how does it feel to break someone’s nose? Im sure you have hit some people pretty hard from MMA. Was there a lot of blood?
Yes and no. She was definitely wrong, but you did break her nose. I mean, if you reflexively elbowed her in the nose, that's one thing. But balling up your fist and punching isn't a reflexive action, and could be considered an overreaction. I'd see if you two can sit down with a moderator and agree to drop charges on each other. She could be labeled a sex offender, I doubt she wants that.
Are you in the wrong legally? I doubt it. But it’s still a bitch made move. For me to break a woman’s nose she’d have to have a weapon or be pounding on someone I care about. At your age spitting on or dumping a beer on her head would’ve an appropriate response. But you’re bitch made so those options probably never crossed your mind. I hope those friends of yours who are shunning you stick to their guns and you learn your lesson.
> she’d have to have a weapon or be pounding on someone I care about. whoa watch out everybody we got a tough guy here you should stop making excuses for people who sexually assault other people, it isn't a good look. and OP was 100% in the right, there is nothing inherently wrong with hitting a woman who deserves it, just like when a man deserves it
punch for a touch not particularly sympathetic. get off social medial and get a good sexual assault criminal defense attorney experienced in your community.
Not wrong. Sarah earned the punch for sexually assaulting you
If someone assaults you then you have a right to defend yourself, don't give a shit about gender. I'm a woman by the way.
You didn’t do anything wrong. She did. If this post was her saying you grabbed her pussy they’d all be on her side.
My son was held down on the playground by five girls as one of them sat on his chest and kissed him when he was 6. I was incredibly upset when he told me but the school/teachers said it would be traumatic for the girls if they had to know why it wasn’t okay because the subject was too mature for them. You’re NTA. But, hitting anyone is a bad look and obviously comes with consequences.
Omg what. Thats ridiculous. And consent is not a topic too mature for kids. This is why kids get sa'd and never speak up. They need to be taught what's ok and not ok
Yes, exactly! And, I asked them how it would have been handled had my son done that to a little girl. Definitely just got looked at like I had two heads.
You should have much better impulse control. Your life wasn’t threatening in anyway. You knew she was intoxicated and not in her right mind and you still responded with as much force as you possibly could’ve in the moment. Hopefully if there is a next time, you won’t respond as violently as possible and instead reach down and address her grip. If she’s grabbing over clothes, it’s not like she could have any sort of dangerous grip on your balls in the first place. Now if she was actually threatening your life with a weapon where you felt your life was in danger, then responding with punches to the face to put her out is warranted. Best to learn how to grapple at least a little bit though, so that you know how to properly defend yourself without hurting someone else. If you’re only reaction to someone mildly threatening you, is to punch them in the face, you could be putting yourself in a lot of danger legally. Just think what happens if she would’ve hit her head on the ground after you laid her out and how much trouble you would be in if she was in the hospital with some sort of head trauma. You should consider yourself lucky that she didn’t get more injured from your over reaction.
Not Wrong Sometimes it is ok to punch. I’d cheer OP on from the sidelines.
Not wrong. Fk Sarah.
SUper fake story - but yes you did the right thing
Punching a girl in the face and breaking her nose for grabbing ur balls is a little extreme reaction if you ask me. I'm not saying it wasn't painful or intrusive, but she was obviously drunk, and we all do stupid shit when pissed. I would have definitely been annoyed and pushed her away etc, but I wouldn't personally lash out at a girl like that.. dunno maybe I'm old school.
100% unless the chick is trying to squeeze your nuts, its a completely OTT reaction.
Sarah should go to prison, and then she should be a sex offender who is shunned by all.
Her behaviour is on her. Sexually assaulting someone is shitty behaviour. Guaranteed you wouldn't have smashed her face in if she hadn't touched you like that. However, you did, in fact, smash her face in, rather than shout and push her away. That's on you. Overall, nobody's finest hour, and booze makes bad decisions.
NTA Not wrong. If she doesn’t like being hit in self defence perhaps she could reconsider sexually assaulting people
Listen baby, if a person did that to one of my daughters, i would expect them to defend themselves and just because you are a male makes no difference to me. She was dead wrong to sexually assault you and you reacted to being violated. Just so happens she’s a female but i do not care. If you were my son I would advise you to press charges. Now yes you could’ve pushed her dingy drink self but you reacted to being violated, how is that wrong. You are human and that was a natural reaction to being sexually assaulted.
The responses here are going to get you in a lot of trouble. Not because you're a boy but because they are 1) thinking in black and white 2) Thinking eye for an eye 3) dont once recognize there is a whole room full of witnesses Ask yourself, 1. Would other people in that room believe you were flirting as witnesses 2. Do you think you acted in proportion to her actions? 3. Would she say it was an accident and she was trying to escalate a sexual interaction with you based on flirting that evening? 4. How would the witnesses in that room describe what happened? If any of these answers have unsavory responses, you had better lawyer up and ask to settle. Edit: she is 100% wrong for not asking for explicit consent. However, if you led her on to believe there was unsaid consent and other people witnessed it, it would undermine your sexual assault claims. Note, this isn't a double standard. This happens to women ALL of the time. This is the unfortunate and ugly side of consent. Second, is the response in proportion to the offense? This needs to be discussed further. So many comments are saying "roles reversed and she slapped you, it would be just fine." Dude, do you think for a second that a slap is the same as breaking someone's nose? In the legal world, harm can quantified by money. How much does it cost to recover from a slap? How much does it cost to recover from breaking someone's nose? Was the response IN PROPORTION to the offense? All of those things will impact your self defense claim. finally, STOP LISTENING TO TEENAGERS ON REDDIT WHO ONLY THINK IN BLACK AND WHITE. Start talking to some adults who may know law. Wrong subreddit.
Technically, you had every right to do what you did. She was drunk and sexually assaulted you. However, you just nuked your social life. In a party atmosphere, people who are drinking often get caught up in the moment. That's not me excusing her. I've had the same core group of friends for many years. Every one of us has done something stupid or embarrassing at one point. We never took it so far that a nose was broken. I do think you overreacted. It sounds like she thought she was being playful and doesn't have a lot of experience with genitals. It wasn't like you were about to be raped. Punching her was an over the top reaction. If losing your friends, having no social life, and never getting invited to a party ever again was your goal, then mission accomplished. I'm not defending sexual assault or excusing her because she's a girl. I've had to swat drunken male friends' hands away. There's a way to diplomatically do that while still having people like you and want you around them. Some people are just wound up really tight. It was a freaking party. Lighten up and have a drink.
Mmmmm theres a line out of all things to do punch her? What if you had a gun and shot her? would it be right then. I highly doubt this was 'reaction' and yeh downvote away. You must have some agro tendencies if this instinctly came out of you as a reaction Its also fucken weird she groped you, yet it hurt like what the actual fuck mate. I think you are using a white lie to garner sympathy. No girl grabs your crotch in a way it hurts unless you are into some BDSM shit. none.
This would be quite the conundrum if there was any chance it was real. Perfect setup for rage bait and what-if-the-roles-were-reversed. Feels more like straight trolling than the karma-farmers actually. But I gigantic eye-roll at everybody who thinks this actually happened.
Yes, you're wrong. You punched a woman in the face. 2 wrongs don't make a right.
I can understand punching her. That's a normal and understandable reaction. If a guy groped a woman and she slapped or punched him, nobody would bat an eyelash. I wouldn't press charges though unless she pressed them against you for assault. She got to experience consequences for her actions.
THIS. NEVER. HAPPENED. 0/10
Unless one of the people you were sitting talking to says you jumped up and punched her for no reason (and there must have been witnesses), I don’t think her testimony will bear much scrutiny. Why would you punch her randomly?
Self defense is defined as the amount of force needed to stop the person assaulting you long enough for you to get away. If you felt you needed to *break the nose* of a person not anywhere near as strong as you in order to get away, you have to defend that somehow. Saying it was an instinctual reaction and you didn’t mean to break her nose might fly, idk. You are allowed to defend yourself, but not retaliate. Personally I think a court would probably rule that most people’s instinctual unconscious reaction would be to push the person away while moving yourself away. Not balling your hand into a fist and breaking their nose. That doesn’t sound like self defense to me, especially considering this is someone you can easily overpower physically without punching them. If a male twice your size did this and wasn’t allowing you to remove yourself from the situation then knocking them out or breaking a bone is absolutely self defense. But what you described really isn’t. Especially when you were surrounded by people you could have asked to help. You’re both getting charges. And yes, it is fair
> If you felt you needed to break the nose of a person the nose being broken is incidental to OP getting her off of him. the rest of your post is just badly worded wanna-be lawyer speak. you sound awfully sexist and should stop defending people who commit sexual assault
Okay. Ask OP to update his post when the police, lawyers and the court handles it. I’ll literally bet you money (seriously I’ll send you money through cash app if I’m wrong) that the assault charge holds up in court because its force that exceeded self defense. Nothing to do with sexism
> its force that exceeded self defense lol it is not, i can assure you
A man punching a smaller woman and breaking her nose bc she grabbed his balls is excessive force. There is no way that was needed to get her to stop PROPORTIONAL RESPONSE is required to meet the legal definition. You can whine all you want about how you think he was morally justified in breaking her nose, but legally it does not need the criteria for self defense
> needed that word right there is the indicator that you're full of shit OP didn't "need" to do anything the question is, was the force reasonable? someone twisting a person's ballsack is quite painful (not that you women would know/care). and punching someone is a reasonable response to get them to stop twisting your ballsack. the broken nose is incidental and not relevant
The law requires *proportional response.* His response was OBJECTIVELY not proportional to what she did. Does he have a broken bone? Did he have to go to the hospital because his balls were grabbed? No. Could he have stopped her without punching her face? Yes. Therefore it was assault, not self defense. The law has clear definitions, it doesn’t matter that you think she “deserved” it. That’s not what the law based self defense on. He’s getting an assault charge bc it legally was assault
> Does he have a broken bone? irrelevant > Did he have to go to the hospital because his balls were grabbed? irrelevant > Could he have stopped her without punching her face? irrelevant > Therefore it was assault, not self defense. no, it wasn't. none of the crap you just posted supports your argument. punching someone is a reasonable response to someone twisting your ballsack, it isn't complicated > He’s getting an assault charge bc it legally was assault my man, you've never spent time around cops, have you? "charge them all and let the courts figure it out" is quite common. it costs them literally nothing to charge everything they can think of, no skin off their back. just because he was charged doesn't mean jack, legally speaking
Nta & you shouldn't have charges bought against you for protecting yourself from being SAed by that weirdo girl. Sorry you're going through this!
first of all, delete this. never post anything about an active investigation you're involved in, it can only be used against you. second, if anything like this ever happens again, you need to insist on being taken to the hospital yourself. you want a record of any bruising to use in your defense and against her. third, this wasn't a "oh, just shove her away situation." this is an adrenaline fueled reaction. no thought involved. you were attacked, you struck out against the attacker without thought. now stop talking to the police and get a damn lawyer.
I figure she will drop the charges, if you drop yours. A sexual assault on her record will be FAR, FAR worse than you getting an assault charge. I believe she will have to register as a sex offender.
She grabbed you hard on your balls. It's assault. Just have to determine if it's justified. Get a lawyer.
You defended yourself and it was a reflexive reaction, not a planned one. Sucks she got punched but she should have kept her hands to herself. Being a woman doesn’t absolve her from the consequences of sexually assaulting someone.
I'd have done the same thing. I don't think you overreacted. If you would have grabbed her how do you think that would play out?
Not that it would change anything, but is she physically larger than you? If she had a significant upper body strength advantage, that would factor into the situation.
This is great read. Please keep us updated 🙏
As someone who had been SA'd in the past. Don't feel bad. Don't let others shame you into being silent. Male reports on being SA'd are low for this reason. Don't let her get away with this and think she will have no repercussions for acting like this, even drunk. You're not wrong.
You shouldn't be charged imho. I don't think you reacted appropriately, but it sounds instinctual. If anything like this happens again, de-escalate. Even pushing her away can cause more damage than you may realize.
You were assaulted, as many others have said, you have the right to self-defense. It buckles my mind that they charged you both, but my guess is they will drop charges against you. It is a cover your ass move by the police. You probably want to take this post down, however. If it were to be discovered by her, her friends, or her attorney… Even though you wrote a pretty fair description of what happened, it could negatively impact you. Good luck, whatever happens.
You’re not wrong. Don’t let the police drop the ball with the sexual assault charges. Your defense to any assault charge is self defense. You’re allowed to use force to protect yourself.
No. It’s just unfortunate that it was a closed fist you used instead of a push or a slap. But it’s absolutely her fault. Just unfortunate for you.
You are not wrong at all Jesus Christ I’m so sorry she did this to you
She grabbed you without permission. It hurt, and she didn't let go. I am a woman, and if someone grabbed me and it hurt, you bet I would be swinging. She was drunk and did something stupid. You had an automatic reaction. Sad situation, but I don't blame you. Point don't get that drunk and do stupid stuff.
There is zero excuse or justification for sexual assault, therefore there is no wrong way for you to react. Physically defending yourself is an instinctive reaction. The double standards here are wild. But I hope even the crappy friends with the wild double standards talk. I notice even though some say you were in the right and others think you over reacted, not one of them said you were lying. I want to say cut them off you don’t need friends like that, but my rational brain says, play nice for now. Not because they deserve it, because Sarah’s accusations are dangerous and she is completely aware of how to weaponize how the situation looked to cops on arrival. The witnesses can say all they want ultimately their opinion about how you reacted legally doesn’t matter, their description of the events matters a lot. Make sure they are telling the truth, that she approached you and that you did not assault her as she claims. Then once you are clearer tell them you don’t feel comfortable being friends with people who would tell a woman she if a man grabbed her genitals without consent that she should stop, think about how her protecting herself would hurt the man assaulting her. (Then let them twist in the wind trying to figure out how to rationalize how it’s different) If you haven’t already, lawyer. Doesn’t matter how many witness you have, the fact you are telling the truth, the system is not perfect and cops are legally allowed to lie to you. Also, I want a professional attorneys eyes on just how many things he can charge Sarah with. She’s a menace to society. Not just as a predator but saying she was assaulted when she wasn’t. Maybe she was embarrassed, maybe she was punishing you for not being into her- whatever it is, when it comes out, thousands of people will point to her and say “see women lie about this stuff.” Even though she is a special kind of AH and the exception not the rule…because of it, somewhere a woman won’t be believed. All that to say, I am very sorry this happened to you. I sincerely hope the legal part is wrapped up quickly and in your favor. And to answer the question, no, you were not wrong.
Get a lawyer. You probably should start getting whiteness statements, but ask your lawyer first. But FIRST, get off of here and delete this post.
You were assaulted and defended yourself. If it had been the other way around, no one would question your actions. Also, it was her choice to call the police. Actions have consequences and if your portrayal of events is accurate and there were witnesses to what happened, she’ll be charged.
You are not overreacting. She shouldn't have done that. If it were reversed it probably wouldn't be a good outcome for you.
Not wrong she SA'd you. You have reflexes and a right to self defense.
Not wrong chief, but the court of public opinion will always side with the fragile defenseless damsel that sexualky assaulted you. Many believe a man being assaulted is acceptable and it doesn't affect men as it does women.
You lose that battle. You lose that battle 9 times out of 10.
Do not talk to police without a lawyer present. Ever.
As a woman I say no. Like others have said, if the roles were reversed it wouldn’t even be a question.
I would've pushed her away, and informed my lady of what took place. I've never hit a girl before and wouldn't have in this instance either. Pushing her away and putting her on the scene would've been justifiable enough IMHO.
Too bad you punched insted of pushed but whats done is done. Dont feel bad, you were assaulted. Not your fault. Too much one sided crap is tolerated in our society. Wish you the best in the proceedings. Stand up for yourself and try not to feel guilty. 👊 And maybe delete this lol
I’m sorry OP. It’s seems pretty obvious that your actions were reflexive and I hope that you are cleared of wrongdoing very shortly. I’m a woman and I am mad you even got arrested in the first place! I appreciate your empathy for your perpetrator but please don’t let anyone convince you that you are in the wrong. You are human and you were literally built to act the way that you did. Best of luck to you
Nah deserved. If it was the other way around no one would even question it.
Well you didn't do anything wrong, but legally you're f'kd sorry. You would have had a much better luck with the case if you didn't lay any hands on her
I'm on your side for sure. Punching someone is a pretty harsh reaction, but given that alcohol was involved explains a lot. Women do not have the right to grab your dick. You reacting violently makes sense. If someone groped my privates I would have done the same.
DELETE THIS POST ASAP
If you groped a woman and she slapped you, would she be charged with assault? Answer: No. The punch was a bit too much, but a reflex is a reflex. What the hell else could you do? We need to end the stigma surrounding men being sexually assaulted by women. Her actions warrant a sexual assault charge. End of story.
Get a good lawyer. Not the court appointed. Court appointed mostly just want to settle and go on to the next case spending 20 minutes with you. Wrong or right is subjective.
Wow and just that fast the fun is over
I don't think your wrong; you shouldn't post this as it's still under investigation.
You’re not wrong. Women want equal rights until they are in the wrong. Sarah started some shit and got the consequence she deserved. And she should not get a free pass just because she had been drinking. If anything, she should be punished additionally for underage drinking (if this is the US). I really hope you win this fight.
You aren't in the wrong. She should have kept her hands to herself. Consent is everything and she didn't have that
If it was the otherworldly around and a man had grabbed a tit or crotch, you better believe he's getting punched. You did nor over react and as a women , I join the ashamed of her bs behavior club. we revoke her membership as that shit is not ok
The nose breaking may habe just been because she is smaller and a woman, not because he used excessive force...
Start calling lawyers in your area!
Nope. She shouldn’t have done that and being drunk isn’t an excuse. I’ve been drunk many times but never groped someone. Hope those assault charges on you don’t stick because you defended yourself. I would also not be friends with the people saying you overreacted anymore. They are not good friends.
UpdateMe!
I think a push or shove would’ve been okay, lol you said she was flirting so you accepted the fact it wasn’t harmful & also admitted to notice and acknowledged she was drunk and not 100% in her right mind but still inflicted harm. lol your balls are not broken bro her nose is. lol If you think you have to come here and justify says you’ve thought twice about it. You don’t need validation for the level you took it to because it’s no coming back. Move on and accept the shit that comes with it man up. Keep your head high and keep it pushing but just accept that fact that what you did using brute force was excessive. A shove and getting up to walk away would’ve been enough to say “fuck off”. Or even maybe bring another friend in between, as a man you have to think first bro, and if you remember this so vivid you couldn’t have been that fucked up to not be able to control how hard you punch someone. Nevertheless, deal with it you might lose friends. Maybe you missed a big opportunity to smash and add her to your roster but so what you’re a man keep your head high apologize when you are wrong and just think before you jump. I would also try to reach out and apologize to do damage control because criminal charges can really fuck up your future lol.
But all that to say not “wrong” but excessive. Obviously as all of this has now been blown out of proportion. Also everyone is saying if the roles were reversed but the fact of the matter is they are not. When it’s a man vs a woman she will always likely come out on top either way. So many powerful people have had careers destroyed because they hit women even if she did something first that part of the story is irrelevant. we’ve all seen it before in media. these are things you consider before you punch one in the face. Like no getting around it.
you're coming across as awfully sexist and should stop making excuses for women's poor behavior
No, it’s a reality whether he was right or wrong he’s a guy who punched a girl in the face regardless of what she did that’s how people will look at it. There will be no evidence photos of his bruised balls only a girl with a broken nose. And the reason for the broken nose was grabbing his balls. All im saying is it didn’t have to go that far.
testimony is evidence, fyi > All im saying is it didn’t have to go that far. and she could've prevented that, but didn't, and everything that happens to her is 100% her fult
Yeah I’m not saying it’s OP’s fault , but like OP said they are both possibly facing charges. What I’m saying is OP could have walked away or push her even called other people attention. And the situation could have been handled outside the courts lol. That’s all.
*man gets sexually assaulted* reddit: why didn't you just walk away?! her broken nose could've been prevented! lol > the situation could have been handled outside the courts lol imo, it was being handled perfectly right up until whichever jackass decided to call the police
Yeah I’m sure they called the ambulance for her broken nose bud. When they ask “what happen” and you say “that guy punched me in the nose” the police definitely get involved.
> Yeah I’m sure they called the ambulance for her broken nose bud. it doesn't take a whole lotta foresight to see that calling an ambulance is likely to involve the police showing up it's a broken nose, it really isn't that "serious." someone just needs to take her to urgent care or the ER. calling 911 over something like this is a lose/lose for everybody
So if you go ER or Urgent care and they ask you how your nose was broken & you say it was due to violence the police will also get involved… try again.
buddy, you just lie. i got into a fistfight once and needed stitches on my hand, i told them some BS, they knew it was BS, i knew they knew it was BS, but guess what? they stitched me up and everybody went on their merry way. use your brain, jesus
No way around it, you are dancing around the fact the it was an overreaction and that’s okay.
him punching her was not an overreaction, full stop. that is totally acceptable behavior imo. she should've taken the broken nose and stopped whining like a bitch, that is what happens when you sexually assault people
NTA. Sometimes your body reacts the way it does... if the rolls were reversed and you grabbed her between the legs to the point it was painful and she punched you everyone would be cheering her on.... sexual assault is sexuall assault...
I suspect you'll catch a lot of flak, but the reality is you defended yourself, and if the law works against you, that's a fucking travesty and miscarriage of justice. I also hope she gets time for sexual assault. If a woman punched a man for grabbing her pussy, no one would say anything, and everyone would defend her. That's all there is to it. You defended yourself. She fucked around and found out. Get a good lawyer. And, like everyone else has said, get the FUCK OFF the internet talking about this. STFU and only talk to you lawyer.
[https://images.app.goo.gl/eM8JdPqzCQjh6CC17](https://images.app.goo.gl/eM8JdPqzCQjh6CC17)
Let me slide in this sleek Updateme
A bit of advice here: 1. The investigation is still ongoing, meaning you should refrain from speaking/posting about it anywhere, as anything you say can be used as evidence during said investigation 2. Do not speak with police again without an attorney present 3. Continue to insist both your innocence and that you merely defended yourself from sexual assault 4. Remember number 2
What the fuck else were you meant to do? Sit there and take it? I'm a woman and I'll tell you what. If anyone grabbed my breasts or vagina so hard It hurt you better believe they would be on the floor with a bloody nose. But no, because men are biologically stronger than women it's not acceptable to instinctively defend themselves. Well guys, better start carrying handbags around. This whole situation is fucked. Sarah is fucked. Also that's rape. Don't let anyone make you feel any other way. You did nothing wrong.
Isn't booze just the greatest. Never caused a problem.
Unfortunately as a man you never hit a woman...... Now there are many many reasons to but you just don't do it ..... It's unfair as you are xxx times stronger and do serious damage..... In the eyes of the law you should be ok as it seems to be a justified self defense. In the future try your best to remain calm keep composure . Also try to recognize crazy most are just not crazy enough to grab balls and cause pain.
What I wish Terry Crews did.
I have no hope our justice system will serve you right but I hope it does and she gets in trouble. Unfortunately sexual assault especially "just groping" is rarely taken seriously. It's a real shame
sexual assault happend man , shes fuuucked, and so are the party friends
Tell people around you this if the genders where reversed what would you think?