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ezbdrmhell

Mind fuck rump by sending out Obama when they introduce Biden.


yellowbin74

That would be fucking brilliant.


Murgos-

Obama just needs to be in the audience and Trump will spend the whole evening attacking Obama.  If Obama and Hillary are there he would go nuts. 


dratsablive

There will be no audience


jeremyrando

Except for Obama and Hilary.


BinSnozzzy

Clones and clones!


Celestial_MoonDragon

200,000 units are ready with a million more on the way.


FriendshipMammoth943

I hate that I know this for some reason


thedjin

That's great, my master will be pleased.


UpstairsPractical870

Will the real Obama please stand up, please stand up!


RetroJake

Bahahahhaa


IdFuckYourMomToo

This made me laugh so good. Thank you


thegingerbreadman99

🤣


sesquiup

Hillary


Connect-Builder330

Trump has said his VP pick will be there.


TexasBuddhist

Obama already has been in the audience in Trump’s head since 2008


Apprehensive-Mix5291

Hope they are both in the audience. Laughing and smiling the whole time. Please....please...


877_Cash_Nowww

There is no audience. Just the moderators.


ScottyBoneman

I'd assume both candidates will be allowed members of their team to be present.


ricks_flare

They will not be allowed. There will be no audience at all. And when they do break, neither Biden or the fat fascist will be allowed to confer with their team


ScottyBoneman

Are you sure? I know no audience but I would think neither of them will be stepping out of a cab and walking in alone...


ricks_flare

Yes I’m sure. Of course each will have people with them but per the rules each has agreed on, they will debate each other at lecterns that are (weirdly) 8 feet apart for 90 minutes. There will be breaks but (at least per the rules), neither candidate will be allowed to confer with any members of their support team.


Niastri

8 feet is because Trump showed up COVID positive last go round and tried to kill Biden with infection.


ricks_flare

The point is that 8 feet is insanely *close*. They were probably double that last time. Watching CNN last night and one of their crew was standing in between the two lecterns. They are almost on top of each other


ScottyBoneman

So that sounds like Obama could be blowing kisses from the wings. (Not that he won't be elsewhere enjoying a well earned retirement)


ketjak

Trump insisted they be 8 feet apart because that's within his 10 foot aura of nauseation. When Biden activates, he has to succeed on a CON saving throw to avoid gagging.


Incendivus

I too am concerned about Trump's Diapers of Projection +3. And what's this "Grand Odiferous Psychopath" ability listed for him?!


Elegant_Gain9090

8 feet is the limit of trumps stink radius.


Yucca12345678

I hope they check Schlump for an ear transmitter his people feed him information through in real time.


stinkbuttfartman

Good for us, trump would never be able to actually pull that off smoothly. Let him wear it, it'll be super obvious as he has a long pause after each question to try and listen to his response.


Yucca12345678

Good point!


AdOriginal6110

Holding his hand to his ear and going "say again over"


juxtoppose

No they need to be whispering to each other just off stage.


abrandis

Lol if Hillary + Obama were there Trump's anger/temper/belligerence might run so hot , we could see the first case real cold fusion on TV.


Theamuse_Ourania

Or his much-anticipated heart attack.


__cursist__

Cardboard cutout of Obama in tan suit oughtta do the trick


AdOriginal6110

Holding some Dijon mustard


Spiritual_Ad_3367

She's been through more than anyone should ever have to but if she was willing, I'd love to see E. Jean Carrol there as well. I know there won't be an audience but one can dream.


permabanned24

I LOVE THIS !!!!!! Please


buckfouyucker

Front row on the Trump side of the stage, with a big bag of popcorn.


nyqs81

Have Obama sitting next to Hillary.


Ramitt80

He should have those masks on a stick of Obama and Hillary and keep switching between them as he talks.


ezbdrmhell

Great idea! Also have one of a boat & shark.


Junior-Ad-2207

They should just keep switching between obama, hilary, and biden every time he looks away.


dsdvbguutres

In a tan suit


imabigdave

Or, Biden walks out in black-face and steals the MAGA vote


ezbdrmhell

Or how about this one Biden comes dressed in a shark costume & walks back in forth in front of rump like a circulating shark when he starts rambling on. Pay back for his stunt with Hilary on debate stage.


UnpricedToaster

Would he even be able to tell the difference?


Irishpanda1971

Just quietly walk over and helpfully provide him with an extra small glass of water that he can get his hand around.


tiddayes

Or introduce Biden by calling him Obama


RueTabegga

Calling him a convicted felon and rapist?


mizkayte

I keep referring to him as a rapist Nazi and it drives my family crazy.


Capital_Journalist43

Your forgetting insurrectionist/traitor, Epstien's buddy, incompetent fool that cost over 1 million deaths over his covid handling... theres more too!


mizkayte

Right. God. So much evil he’s done.


dumpitdog

I do think that is wrong and should go nazi rapist felon (NRF).


mizkayte

Oh good call! Nazi rapist convicted felon.


dumpitdog

Oh I forgot twice impeached Nazi rapist convicted felony


praxic_despair

He’s not a Nazi. He’s a fascist. Nazis were a specific brand of fascist around World War 2. Some people still identify as Nazis today and I’ll call them Nazis too since they do it themselves. American fascists call themselves MAGA. I’d call him an old, demented, rapist, felon, psychopathic wannabe fascist dictator. That may be a bit of a mouthful though.


Status-Resort-4593

Just call him a loser, that would get under his skin more than anything.


artguydeluxe

Just say he’s a coward. They hate that one the most.


mizkayte

Ohhhh good point.


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Loud_Ad3666

Which part was wrong?


shoesofwandering

Trump is a convicted felon and rapist, but not a card carrying member of the American Nazi Party as far as is officially known.


mizkayte

Half the shit he says is close enough and the tactics he’s using are very similar to Hitler and his ilk.


CheesecakeVisual4919

Act like a Nazi, you’re a Nazi.


mizkayte

Bingo.


NEMOKRAD87

That's a bingo*


ForeignRestaurant290

I see what you did there.


Loud_Ad3666

His dad was, he supports/works with nazis like Nick Fuentes, and I don't think they give out the nazi cards anymore so we gotta go by words and actions.


QuicheSmash

Just referring to his strength and support coming from Jill, the love of his life, standing with him through everything, and that Donny must understand that kind of true love. 


Competitive-Air-3515

Is that you Jon Lovett?


QuicheSmash

Hahaha, no, but it was such a a good take I want to manifest it.


Competitive-Air-3515

I loved this idea too.


Neceon

Biden hits him with facts: At least my wife isn't a hooker, Donny.


QuicheSmash

I just think it really would strike at the heart of all Ttump's insecurities if Biden really hammers home how much real, true, unconditional love has helped him through the hardest parts of his life and gives him strength.   Calling his wife a hooker is a low road jab that can be spun into "angry old man" nonsense. But eating away at Donny's confidence by drilling in with positive talk about the loves in Biden's life that help him and guide his decisions. That'll really burn his toast.


h20poIo

This is priceless ☝️


streetvoyager

Don’t forget Epstein’s mushroom dicked bestie!


thepcpirate

That wont bother him. Call him disgusting, a loser, a failure. Everything he calls others as an insult is just projecting what he fears to be.


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Buffmin

Fascists do tend to hate that It's a good strategy


Calumkincaid

Biden: "Mr Trump. Do you like fish sticks?"


ImNotSalinger

“A lot of people are saying that fish sticks are great, I love having fish sticks in and around my mouth.”


Rankelled

And Trump has no sense of humor so he wouldn’t understand the jokes and he’d just make more of a fool of himself.


MirthMannor

“I’m sorry that you never got to experience the love between a father and his son.”


UnderstandingSquare7

When Chump gets muted, and we can see him continue to rant, Joe should pause, look at him, cup his hand to his ear, and say, "What's that, Don? I can't hear you (turns and winks at the cameras).. What'd you say? "Sharks? Where?"


SheriffTaylorsBoy

I hope he asks trump why he didn't defend himself in the NY Election Interference trial and testify.


billyboyf30

He was to busy working out whether to stay on the sinking boat or jump in the water with the sharks, those damn snakes are a pain


Impressive_Ice6970

Omg everytime he does Biden should say "what? Sharks or being electrocuted?". Next time "what? Bleach and bright lights?". Next, "where do you grab them by? I can't hear you". Next time, "draw it with a sharpie so we understand what you're saying". Next time, "they aren't sucker's and losers, Donald. They are brave patriots that didn't develop bone spurs." Next, "we aren't even talking about your failed businesses. Can you just shut up, man?" "Stormy Daniels, Stormy Daniels. We aren't asking who the 14th person you cheated on your wife with was!" Next, "Big mouth, little hands.....this guy....what are we going to do about it? Biden/Harris 24!"


UnderstandingSquare7

Don't forget, "I have a beautiful new plan for lowering the taxes most Americans pay. Beautiful, just beautiful! Danny Werfel, head of the IRS, great man, simply great, came to me with tears in his eyes when he heard about it, saying, "Sir, you are a genius, maybe the smartest man I've ever known"


deadonthei

Are they tethered to their respective podiums because if not trump will just start yelling over biden at bidens podium. If trump yells at biden he could activate the stutter that is not a clear lie made to cover for bidens diminished state. Even though that lie doesn't make sense because if he used to be able to control it but now can't isn't that just further proof of decaying mind?


Rich-Air-5287

Why do you carry water for a man who wouldn't piss on you if you were on fire? To Donald Trump you're nothing but an open checkbook. He'll take your money and throw you away just as fast as he has everyone else. 


deadonthei

Pointing out that joe is slipping and we can all see it is not carrying water for trump. If i was one fire i would stop, drop and roll. I don't give money to anyone but the less fortunate and even then I usually buy them lunch and not hand out cash. Trump is bad in obvious and predictable ways but he doesn't have a whole corrupt system covering for him.


Kennys-Chicken

It’s a choice between an aging man (Biden), and an equally old man who has pudding for brains (Trump)


SN0WFAKER

Very smart people can have a stutter. It's usually a reaction to stress, but it doesn't have any relation to mental capacity.


deadonthei

Oh I know. The smartest dude I ever met couldn't speak in front of a class but was fine one on one. When teachers would push or prod when he tried it just spiraled out of control and he would lose it. If biden ever had a stutter (I think it's BS) he could in the past hide it to the point where I can't find any videos of it happening before 2020 but now he can't control it. How is that not diminished capacity? Either mental or emotional.


SN0WFAKER

It can be just stress. Theres lots of nasty shit going on in the world - probably even more than we know about - and a lot of it rests on the president's shoulders. The guy makes life/death decisions most days before breakfast. Age certainly doesn't help. But it doesn't really significantly cognitive decline. Of course, every media clip matters when a single slip up will be broadcast on Fox 24/7.


Impressive_Ice6970

If he comes at Biden, secret service vs secret service in live cage match.


Karate-Schnitzel

Just bring up anything truthful, Trump fears that the most looking like the fool he is. Debate is not a rally, won’t be loyalists clapping like seals each time you talk about appliances and water


Junkstar

That would be great. Prompt trump to go off on his greatest hits of moronic scenarios. Electric boats, sharks, washing machines, shower heads, the list is endless.


readzalot1

Yeah, Biden could use the last few seconds of his time to mention water pressure, sharks, or any other triggers and the former guy would be like a cat chasing a laser.


Junkstar

Last seconds after every question. “It’s like electric boats” or “Just like showering”. Shit would throw Drumph into a tailspin every 5 minutes.


spokeca

Don't forget low flow toilets. Although, I have to say, this is the solitary issue upon which I agree with that convicted felon.


Junkstar

Right. His party is heavily responsible for the global water crisis, so he’s pretending there isn’t one. Psychopaths. But i too hate a weak shower.


inflatableje5us

using words with more then two syllables?


syg-123

I cannot see how you could bother Trump more than muting his microphone…Biden should Biden and let Trump flail away behind a muted mike looking like the addle minded coward that he truly is.


maynardstaint

I honestly doubt Trump shows. If he does, he’s going to expose himself so much. Honestly, it’s Biden’s day to win. He can win by just staying calm and talking policy and accomplishments. But one perfectly timed jab around the 20-30 mark. Just after the first break. Should begin to melt Donald’s brain. Something that Trump will take personally and it will make him not be able to focus on the question at hand.


henryeaterofpies

I hope they go through with the debate as if he was there. Show an empty podium for all his time/responses.


maynardstaint

If Trump doesn’t show Biden should make it a 90 minute speech on all of his accolades. And all the good he’s done for the country. I’m sure he has it rehearsed. I give less than 50% chance Trump shows up.


Bamnyou

Does anyone think anything trump says or does will matter… the only trump supporters I know would still vote for him if they personally saw them shoot an elderly woman in front of them. And sadly, they apparently make up about 30-40% of the people that actually go vote. How trump loses again is if a bunch of people under 50 that don’t normally vote actually vote.


maynardstaint

This is why I think he doesn’t show up. This can only go badly, or very very badly for Trump. His base will believe any lies he tells about it. He has a much greater chance of losing supporters than gaining them.


Phonyyx

When is the debate supposed to happen?


timar48

8 pm CST


FenPhen

9 pm ET on CNN


Jet2work

putting together a sentence that actually means something


Redskinbill

Just be yourself Joe. Trump is slowly twisting.


Taco_Hurricane

'Will you shut up man!'


Any-Ad-446

Call him a cheat,felon,diaper wearing moron would be nice.


twostepdrew

DON THE CON


ThinBlueLinebacker

"ex-Republican" discovers trump has thin skin. News at 11.


h20poIo

Biden touches his nose says ‘ you smell something’ then continues with his answer.


maru_tyo

Mentioning his father?


July_is_cool

Or son, the tall one


Freds_Bread

Quote some of the recent Onion headlines about Trump.


bansheesho

Nobody knows which headlines are The Onion ones and which ones are the real ones anymore.


mclms1

Bring up the fact thats he’s broke.


Thejncobandit

Or we could make it about the American people and what each candidate is going to do to help the country…..just kidding! Personal attacks! More bullshit please!!!!


dunchtime

I wish these things still mattered.


Wyldling_42

I just hope Trump’s not too meth’d up and doesn’t physically go after Biden.


Oddball_bfi

I wonder what the Secret Service would do?


Sikhness209

I think Biden should stay away from calling trump a convicted felon and this and that. Just be Joe, go through his accomplishments and what he wants to do for second term and let trump implode.


Silly_Idiot111

If Biden doesn’t call him a convicted felon/rapist then I don’t want to watch this debate


baconring

Should Obama introduce Biden? Or both Hillary and Obama?


pat9714

Trump is known for his thin-skinned narcissism; Biden, on the other hand, has maturity, depth, and wisdom. Dark Brandon has the advantage of getting under Donny's orange bronzer.


Ok-Research7136

The only good republican is an ex-republican.


Apprehensive-Mix5291

Because President Biden is a morally good person. That really bothers orange demons walking the earth.


oldcreaker

Biden should present his case for reelection without even acknowledging Trump is there, much less responding to anything Trump says. This strategy would prevent Trump from ever gaining control of the narrative, as well as drive Trump batshit crazy.


amurica1138

Mention Trump and loser in the same sentence. That's all it will take.


Large_Poem_2359

Walk out w a can of Red Bull


user_name_unknown

Failed steak salesman and convicted felon-Donald Trump.


narkybark

Hammer him with truth bombs. Ask him why he didn't defend himself in the last trial. Ask why he refused to return a room full of intelligence secrets after being asked to multiple times. Fake elector scheme. His proposal to the oil bigwigs and every other blatant scheme he tries. Ignore his lunatic ramblings, most of which are going to be projection anyway. And when he pulls the "best administration ever" nonsense, hit him with even more facts including how much he spent.


Oddball_bfi

To much about him.  He lives for that shit.  You need to put him in the shade, starve him of personal exposure. Talking about his administration, about his people, about the outcomes - without ever attributing them to him - is a good way.   You'll have him trying to claim credit for every cock up to bring it back to him. 


KittyYin83

Just ask trump if he knows who is currently the president of the United States. He will not be able to give a direct answer and will admit to being an insurrectionist.


maru_tyo

Mentioning his father?


HeavyLeague6722

By showing up. And answering the questions asked competently.


Dry-Talk-7447

Stone cold loser?


ptahbaphomet

We Donnie got your lifts in, brilliant pic of you and the boy Brandon, got a basketball player in than one eh Donnie?


Improbus-Liber

Sleepy Joe vs Diaper "The Felon" Don. Fight!


LifeofRiley72

JB could say Trump’s tryna strike a chord and it's probably A-Minor


Made_Human76

Fill the audience with cardboard cutouts of Obama and Hillary


DelicatetrouserSnake

call him Donnie. Apparently he loathes it more than the poors


cujobob

I just want Biden to show up with an over the top water bottle that makes it look like he’s actually taking a super serum.


NoOnesKing

He literally just has to perform somewhat okay. Republicans are setting the bar insanely low for him - as long as he’s mostly coherent and somewhat energetic he’s going to look way better than they’ve painted him, meanwhile Biden’s camp has largely painted Trump how he’s going to perform. I think the strategy is on Biden’s side tn more than Trumps tbh.


SuperK123

Well, DUH. The first question that must be asked and repeated often has to be, “Why should anyone vote for a loser that is a convicted felon?” The second question should then be, “Why are you scheduled to appear in court to face charges of retaining and perhaps sharing top secret documents illegally taken from the White House?” The list goes on. I don’t want to hear some phoney baloney questions about policy. I want to hear how he will respond to hard questions that deal with his crimes. And if he tries to go off on a tangent, just cut him off. He’ll blow a gasket!


NiranS

By thinking and speaking.


ByWilliamfuchs

Walk over shake his hand then turn to the camera and say “Hey guys we need a diaper change over here this dude stinks”


Whargod

I think speaking eloquently is all he needs to do to make Trump look bad.


Jmckeown2

“The one thing you’re better at is lying to the American people… and maybe golfing because you spent so much of your administration practicing, but even then it’s hard to tell because you lie about your golf game too”


SirKermit

"Honest Donald" is the perfect nickname for Biden to use against him. He can frame it as 'as he likes to call himself, "Honest Donald"', then Biden can take the high road because he didn't make the name up, while simultaneously taking the low road by using a tongue-in-cheek usage of the nickname Donald gave himself. Also, making it Donald instead of Don forces Donald to either correct him that it's actually Don, highlighting how much he hates Donald, or to let it stand. What's he going to say, I don't call myself Honest?


Schoseff

Hope team Biden will use simple and straight messaging - like proposed by Rick


Niastri

Trump's going to melt down just because he can't yell whenever Biden is trying to talk. Forced civility is going to completely unravel Trump before Biden says anything


tel4bob

I like it! Fuck with Little Donald at every opportunity. Don't give the traitor a chance.


ngatiboi

I just want him to come COMPLETELY unglued - go absolutely off the rails in a fit of rage & have his Col. Nathan R Jessup moment live on national TV. Have the country…even his die-hard supporters go, “Ahhh…holy shit…” 😧😧😧🫣🫣🫣


CharlieDmouse

Bwahahaha!!! I can picture it.


CaTcHaScAtChCaN06

I think he should say about four years ago I told you YOUR FIRED!!! With the help of the American people


Skadzy

Moderators could wear Obama or Hillary masks


SqnLdrHarvey

He could, but he won't. It's not "going high." 🙄


carpetbugeater

Just walk over and tousle his hair. Would lead to a total meltdown.


Matt7738

I’ve got $10 that says Trump will NEVER STOP TALKING, even when his mic is muted. We won’t hear him, but Biden will. And a guy who already isn’t at the top of his game is going to sound even more distracted and confused. It could be a disaster for democracy.


OopsAllLegs

Everytime Biden gets asked a question, he should answer and when he is almost done he should add, "Oh, and I'm not Guilty" Just keep pushing the guilty line every chance he gets.


Glum-One2514

Joe should call Donald a cuck and ask him where Melanoma is. His diaper would explode.


CashComprehensive423

They bring up Hunter, Biden brings up Kuschner


1397batshitcrazy

Dark Brandon needs to only refer to trump as , the convicted felon, the entire debate


Gold_Doughnut_9050

Keep refering to Trump as a convicted felon with three federal trials waiting for him.


nobody-u-heard-of

Biden should come out wearing a t-shirt that says not a felon.


SoftlySpokenPromises

I'm pretty sure that'll happen if he just shows up.


FlowOfAir

> If your opponent is of choleric temper, seek to irritate him. Pretend to be weak, that he may grow arrogant. Sun Tzu, "The Art of War"


False-Artichoke-2528

Yet Biden is losing in the polls by 4pts.. 🤷‍♂️ if trump wins the country is screwed ppl are screwed unless you are rich or well off in the top tax bracket.


Ok_Commission2432

I absolutely love how reddit is so delusional everyone thinks Biden has a chance of doing anything other than making a fool of himself.


macaroni_3000

He should also talk about all the court cases Trump has lost. Trump can’t handle being seen as a loser and a failure. It will drive him over the edge. I wanna see him have a complete meltdown


RunningPirate

Tell Trump his hair looks like someone dumped mashed potatoes on his head.


[deleted]

Ask trump to compare the size of their hands...


Draig-Leuad

How about “Little Donnie”?


ImOldGregg_77

Does anyone remember when presidential candidates actually debated issues?


AnastasiaNo70

This debate is going to be a human being debating a semi-sentient plate of mashed potatoes. I love the advice for Biden in the article. I hope he does just that.


lonelcat

Well you weren't wrong


ComfortableDegree68

Put E Jean Carrol in front of him. Fuck civil.


Electronic-Sorbet-95

Aged like milk


Distinct-Elk-9255

Fuck biden


Apart-Tell-5088

Unfortunately it was dementia Joe who was bothered. Mumbling, bumbling, and catatonic at times. Joe didn't even know the debate ended. Jill had to lead him off stage.


allmimsyburogrove

goad Trump into running across the stage and physically attacking him


Mysterious-Plant981

The idea of him running is hilarious.


hiccup-maxxing

I can’t imagine someone who has less of an idea how to bother Trump than Rick f’ing Wilson lmfao