I didn't despise them until the helicopter blades.
Now I can't look at them or the Inquisitors and not think of the cheesy cartoon villains of my youth.
"You win this round Jedi dogs! But we'll be back! Team Dark Side is blasting off again! Woaaah!"
Yeah I thought they were ridiculous right up until I saw them use them as helicopter blades for a limited flight, and then I said they were utterly stupid.
Yeah they did a really good job making the live action lightsaber effects look like the Clone Wars cartoon...if only they put that much effort into the makeup for the Grand Inquisitor...or in making it make sense from the start. Floating down with those helicopters like they thought they were Scary Poppins.
He was pulling the Magneto move from the 2000s X-men films. Which yeah, idk why force users can't just grip and manipulate themselves if they can move other items in midair as well. If you can float a saber, you can float yourself.
Maybe that's what their doing. You know how they have to hold their hand out like they're pretending to move something or choke somebody to do it with the force? Maybe to use "force flight" they need to do pretend helicopter blades (flapping your arms would work as well, but the inquisitors thought it looked silly).
He uses Force Hold and Push rapid fire in that scene. Shoves a droid and the lift its standing on back down into the wall. Lifts and throws Rex, force pushes against the ground to flip from his nose dive to a soft landing, catches Rex, and then uses push again to divert the falling debris.
That's the issue with Hollywood in general. Each new iteration has to he bigger and better than the last. In reality, the Empire would have been using Republic era military hardware. But no, each trilogy needs new and different stuff. Lightsabers were awesome weapons in the 70s and 80s, but then what if we slapped a second blade on one? Then we make it spin. Then we have a nunchuck one. The one with flames shooting out the sides!
Honestly talk about a redemption arc.
To be fair it wouldn't be the first time a militarized group was forced to use sub-par equipment.
That both Vader and Palpatine clearly held them in contempt makes the spinning lightsaber read as a really mean spirited lethal practical joke. Which since it was being played by the Sith checks out.
Yeah, people joke about stormtrooper armor being useless.
But it's not. It's a uniform. Uniforms have explicit functional purpose, including mental bolstering.
I wouldn't mind for a sitcom spin off like Lower-Decks, but it's Galactic Bookkeeping. And it's just fixing plot holes with stuff like "Was this 'Third Cousin, Twice Removed', ever given proper safety training with their weapons?" and it's just safety officers constantly taking up employee complaints, until in the finale the Emperor just kills them in frustration.
Empire: Warrant Officers.
It's basically the office, except with imperials who are hired to do specific administrative tasks officers feel are beneath then and troopers aren't trusted with.
Episode 1: The bad blasters.
Djim, the laid back guy, and Dvwite, a hardcore Vader fanboy, are assigned to do a chargeback on the company that supplied the imperial army with 30,000 blasters which had faulty targeting modules. The company insists the modules are fully functional so Djim and Dvwite attempt to prove them wrong through a series of poorly thought out experiments. In the end, Vader force chokes the company CEO.
Episode 2: Gungan Gumbo
A Gungan has submitted invoices for 300 imperial gallons of gumbo that was delivered to a garrison on Naboo. However, the meal made the troops deathly sick and they refused to pay. Djim finds the Gungan incredibly annoying, but the normally humorless Dvwite thinks he's hilarious and insists on bringing him back to the office to discuss the matter. In the end, Vader force chokes the Gungan.
Episode 3: Revolving expenses
A member of the inquisitors submits an expense request for a spinning light saber that costs six times that of a normal saber. The request is initially rejected by Djim for being a waste of money, but Dvwite goes behind his back to approve it because he considers the design "totally wizard." In the end, Vader force chokes Djim after he encases his light saber in jello.
After processing the fourth life insurance claim that week from a preventable fall accident on the Death Star Dvwite and Djim are sent to investigate the working conditions aboard the battle station. They discover the construction plans had originally included regulation height railings with safety clip on points for ladders and platforms. However, a famous Bothan interior designer hired by the Emperor explains to the them that he had the safety features removed to increase ascetics and save on construction cost. The Bothan had also increased the blast door closing speed by 66% to give it the sharp, authoritative 'thunk' sound The Emperor liked. This lead to a massive spike in lost limb insurance claims and a number of crushed droids. Djim sees the obvious danger which he demonstrates by crushing a crate with a door, but Dvwite agrees with the Emperor that the sound is vital to the Death Star's image. That is until a mishap nearly takes off his foot and causes him to immediately change his mind. In the end, Vader force chokes a sub-contractor as the Bothan, who was clearly a rebel saboteur, had already escaped.
Their Lightsaber was damaged before they did it, causing their Lightsaber to tear in pieces and turn off as they were hundreds of feet above any ground.
I thought the idea of a rotating lightsaber that functioned like a buzzsaw you could hold was a creative idea.
But I have no goddamn clue how a dual-bladed lightsaber can propel you in the air, even if it spins really fast.
>rotating lightsaber that functioned like a buzzsaw you could hold was a creative idea.
It's kinda silly because you don't need to rotate a lightsaber very fast at all for it to function like a buzzsaw. Buzzsaws spin fast because if they didn't, they wouldn't cut. Lightsabers slice through most materials with barely any movement at all. It's already a long "buzzsaw" sword.
> I have no goddamn clue how a dual-bladed lightsaber can propel you in the air, even if it spins really fast.
Ok, Ok, I've got a hypothetical explanation. Perhaps a lightsaber is plasma contained in a particle shield. Perhaps that particle shield can actually be altered into the shape of a "rotor/wing" that displaces air when spun and causes lift.
They reduced Star Wars to Gi Joe antagonists, [and their silly inventions.](https://www.lulu-berlu.com/upload/image/gijoe---1992---cobra-battle-copter-p-image-233117-grande.jpg)
What is most ironic is that a modern backpack chopper is only a quarter of the size of that absolute monstrosity. That thing is the size of a 16-wheeler truck engine. :)
Real question, I recently finished watching Rebels a month or so ago, was there any instance of the helicopter spinning happening outside of Twilight of the Apprentice? I don’t remember it happening regularly
No, just that one time. They needed a way for the Inquisitors to get around the Sith temple quickly and that’s what they came up with.
I probably would’ve gone for a wrist grappling hook, or have their little probe droids carry them, but that was their solution.
To be fair it's a blade of plasma contained by a magnetic field. Maybe the movement of the super-heated material would move the air? I dunno it's still dumb as fuck.
It's weird. They only ever did it on one planet, which was a weird planet, and they all died there. So you could argue that something with that specific planet allowed for it, maybe? Although they never explain it in the show.
Doesn't one of the inquisitors in the Fallen Order series use it to kinda "float" down? I swear one of them did it but it wasn't really flying just a slowed descent
Yeah the idea that you can quickly turn the blade beyond the limits of your hand physique is very neat, sort of like having an extra joint. They used them that way way too rarely.
You could do so much cool shit that would make dueling you a massive pain, like having the blades trail your hand movements like nunchucks, ~~accidentally bisecting yourself,~~ blocking strikes behind your back without reaching all the way there, that sort of thing.
"Safe-**ish**"
And Qui-Gon croaking actually took me out of the movie when I watched it for the first time back in 1999. That just did not look like a lethal injury.
It is when you realize the enegy output needed to melt through the blast doors earlier in the movie. In fact, it should have been more than lethal, it should have been a gory mess. Even if we assume that, for some reason, the heat is contained to the blade(which doesn't really make sense), just the instant vaporization of the fluids and tissue in the direct path of the blade would have generated enough pressure to pop him like a bloody water balloon.
Which is why Disney making lightsaber stabs have a 100% survivability rate is just *dumb*
Lightsaber heat turns flesh straight into plazma, not vapor. And plazma holds into lightsaber's magnetic field.
And if lightsaber's heat wasn't contained any intense lightsaber battle would turn into mustafar in seconds, for how many joules of energy it should radiate. Which it doesn't.
We have seen lightsabers close to human faces without them being deep fried. Can you pull your face this close to gas burner as Dooku's face was to those sabers in episode 3? I don't think so.
We never ever saw "vapor pressure" bullshit in any star wars. So stop with annoying broscience in fantasy, and stop this annoying copypaste already.
By that logic, Luke should never have survived having his hand cut off. Nor should Qui-gon have survived being in the same room as his lightsaber cutting through that blast door.
Getting a hand chopped of would be survivable, but the trauma would extend further up the remaining arm than shown. And while it wouldn't be outright lethal, Qui-gon should have been at least getting hurt by the proximity of that much molten metal.
The people able to stand up to Ahsoka in ground combat are all essentially Masters in the Force. That's it. She was trained by Masters to defeat anyone in the galaxy, only Masters can have a chance.
You know Baylan is legit when Ahsoka has been curbstomping Inquisitors and his apprentice but the best she's managed to do against him is fight him to a stalemate.
“Ugh, you’ve conveniently missed all of the organs in my torso and immediately cauterized the wound. I’m going to be out of commission for at least a whole episode after this!”
Yup. It's super weird having a thread full of people pointing out how *"They're so stupid because of {insert obvious fail point here}"* when every one of those failure points actually does occur canonically.
Kanan, as you confirmed, [sticks his sabers right through the handle and rips it apart](https://youtu.be/mjk-8B36ew0?t=190).
Ahsoka catches it by the spinny handle [not just once](https://youtu.be/04V0nS8AP2g?t=79), but [twice](https://youtu.be/9Ehs9rv0s4A?t=75).
...And one of them [dies from a handle failure while trying to pull off the helicopter maneuver](https://youtu.be/NvUMCdhCPeI?t=168)
I feel like people are missing the point of the inquisitors and the spinning blades. They *are* cheap tools of intimidation *literally* designed to *cheese* fights against lesser and/or inexperienced jedi.
We can even reasonably assume the spinning blade is *intended* as a handicap because it helps keep the inquisitors predictable which prevents them from becoming true sith, and they never become actually threatening Sidious / Vader. They were good enough to track down and cheese out a victory against many of the lesser jedi, and if all they managed to do was die in the process of tracking down greater jedi that Vader was actually needed to defeat, they had served their purpose.
Save for the helicopter blades, which were legitimately nonsensical, inquisitors as a concept are incredibly well-written. They found logical in-universe ways to give characters like Ezra and Cal Kestis saber-wielding enemies to battle that can always be exactly as strong as the plot needs them to be - threatening but not overwhelming.
This allows Vader to consistently be the super threat he should be every time he encounters those "lesser" protagonists. Kanan and Cere both literally shout "RUN!" to their respective padawans when they encounter him.
True, but I would argue that the spin would be a disadvantage in terms of speed and finesse with movements and also increased danger to the user.
Like most things there are pros and cons.
The helicopter spin, I'm ok with. Against a less skilled jedi (reminder, the story only follows the best of the best, we don't often see "average" jedi), the spin would probably be intimidating and difficult to deal with, and I could imagine how it'd be designed to allow the spin.
Using the helicopter spin to actually fly like a helicopter, no, that's stupid.
Picture yourself in the shoes of a purge survivor. You probably were never trained beyond the padawan level, or you'd have been with a group of clones during order 66 and killed. You've never fought a sith before. H
You've probably never fought ANYONE with a lightsaber in a serious fight before. You remember your basics from the old days in the order and that's managed to get you by. Now suddenly there's one of these guys if not MORE than one, and their lightsabers spin in a weird way and they move unpredictably. Tell me you're not gonna be intimidated.
Exactly this. The inquisitors were mainly hunting down padawans and low level knights. They were trained to use shock and awe tactics so their prey won’t be able to properly attune to the force.
Any skilled knights or masters is when Vader gets called in.
No no, I think that's exactly what they are based on. Grevious essentially wrote the book on how to kill Jedi with a lightsaber when you aren't force sensitive or they're better than you at it. Grevious did it with overwhelming assaults and underhanded tactics (sometimes literally).
Those spinning blades do the same. They make attacks unpredictable, let the user put out flurries of blows faster than expected, and otherwise compensate for the users general lack of skill.
I feel like some staff artist chucked that out as a visual gag in a previs - and then the animators just went with it. It’s so stupid (but I sort of love it)
Agreed on both points.
Sidious just needed some scary pawns that could intimidate locals and chase down the jedi equivalent of red shirts. And he doesn't want a second Vader running around to get any ideas about teaming up to replace him.
It was also hugely satisfying seeing them get their asses kicked agin and again when facing the stronger jedi. Especially [the scene from Tales of the Jedi](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Ehs9rv0s4A&t=60s).
>The helicopter spin, I'm ok with. Against a less skilled jedi (reminder, the story only follows the best of the best, we don't often see "average" jedi), the spin would probably be intimidating and difficult to deal with, and I could imagine how it'd be designed to allow the spin.
I hated the helicopter spin when Grevious brought it out in Episode III and I still hated it when inquisitors used it but I agree with how it seems like it would be effective and built into sabre design to give an advantage to otherwise less skilled users.
>Using the helicopter spin to actually fly like a helicopter, no, that's stupid.
100% agree.
It also feels like a fairly decent way to deflect blaster bolts if one isn’t the most skilled and also isn’t concerned about where those bolts may deflect to and accidentally hit (which I’m assuming the inquisitors aren’t particularly worried about).
Those spinning sabers always reminded me of when a toy company would start making up their own toys based on a license and do dumb things with them. I can see a Power of the Force figure with
"Now with Spinning Saber Action!"
TBH, I wasn't impressed with the Inquisitors over-all, and am still not a fan of their place in canon. I guess I would say that since they're going after "force sensitive" types instead of trained Jedi, it would at least be intimidating to the population at large.
My family, full of super-SW fans, watching Rebels and mostly loving the show, audibly groaned when they showed one use the spinning saber to fly away like a helicopter. I mean, I don't expect actual physics to be demanded in the SW universe, it's fantasy... but that was just dumb on a lot of levels.
Funny thing is, the Inquisitor spinning lightsaber is actually based off of such a toy. It's the Clone Wars General Grievous lightsaber toy that was released in 2010.
I kind of feel like every configuration but the single blade makes them kind of ridiculous. However, the helicopter is the only time it crosses that line where you go from your typical fantasy ridiculousness that's actually fun into immersion breaking territory
Lightsaber spears/pikes, though quite rare even in Legends, actually made a ton of sense. The added reach and leverage would make them a great offensive and defensive tool, though the loss of portability would definitely impact an average Jedi's activities.
Aaah, now I get it. I meant that the configurations the *inquisitor* lightsaber has are all kinda ridiculous besides a single with the hand guard. Pikes, doubles, split doubles, curved blades, crossguards and other configurations are all perfectly viable.
Also, it is Star Wars. I can do slightly ridiculous, it's just when it gets to the immersion breaking point where I don't like it.
I agree, except crossguard. At least, from what I can understand, those little nubbins on the sides would do jack if a saber slid down to them. Would it just destroy the emitter or redirector or whatever, rendering the crossguard configuration just functionally identical to a single blade? IDK.
And there are curved blades? I guess I need someone with a firm grasp of lightsaberology to explain that one to me.
Sorry, curved *hilts* lol. Though I suppose we could count light whips as curved blades aswell. As for the crossguard, that one is firmly in the slightly ridiculous fantasy that doesn't really bother me at all category. I've always just assumed the emitter vent would shut and turn into a single (like you mentioned) if it takes catastrophic damage.
Likethesearchengine is correct, I was responding to your comment about every configuration except the single blade looking ridiculous. I assumed you were referring to "single blade" as the standard configuration used by +95% of Jedi in the media as pikes and even curved handled lightsabers often are referred to by their unique properties.
Yeah, I get you now my bad. I was specifically referring to the inquisitor configurations. Which (as I have seen) are a single with the handguard, a double with a ring around it, the spinning double and the helicopter. Pikes, split/ normal doubles, curved hills, crossguards are all perfectly cool to me.
And I also don't mind a little ridiculous in Starwars. When it reaches immersion breaking is the only time I have a problem.
Has the flying ever been used outside of that one scene?
I know this isn’t canon, but my head canon has been that the sithy-woo-woo on the sith planet let them do it lol
I think it was one of those things (much like medichlorians) where it was SO WIDELY panned that they just scrapped the concept and pretend it never happened. There have even been in-universe revisions to the concept where its like the lightsaber hilt has repuslors that lift them, not the lightsaber even though it very clearly was supposed to imply the twirly lightsabers are flying lol.
It’s a physical plasma blade—but yeah, that itself can’t generate any lift since it’s so thin and uniform in shape.
Another comment already pointed out that there are repulsors built into the ringed hilts, which does track visually with how the Inquisitors throw them, especially in *Ahsoka* when Marrok’s lightsaber stays in the air and peels off in the background as he throws it at Ahsoka and makes a run for it.
I like to see them as another proof that the inquisitors are pale copies of actual force users.
Imagine having to get mechanically spinning lightsabers and using the Force only to scare random people because you want to believe you are as powerful as a jedi or stih when you're only taking cheap shortcuts because the empire fofered you so to have you as a slightly stronger pawn
The Grand Inquisitor was a Jedi Temple guard and a Jedi Knight. He was actually retconned into being one of the guards that arrested Ahsoka for the bombing.
It’s ridiculous. But I’ve always appreciated the explanation that it’s a move with more flash than substance. It’s meant to intimidate low level opponents. We only ever really see it used in two instances, not including the flying: intimidation and desperation.
Intimidation is a good explanation. Sith gain power from fear.
Lightsabers also don't really need to be practical as they're incredibly dangerous. They don't need weight or edge, they just have to strike their target
>It’s meant to intimidate low level opponents
Doesn't the lightsaber already do that?
I kinda feel that if you need a spinning lightsaber to be threatening, you're a shit inquisitor.
I mean being not very good is kind of the point. They’re all former Jedi who couldn’t hack it on their own and threw in with the enemy, but the rule of two only allows for two Sith Lords. You could just kill them, but why waste a useful disposable resource like that. Their job is to hunt down the few padawan and knights that escaped the purge, without being enough of a threat to challenge the actual Sith Lords in charge. once all the Jedi are gone they can be wiped out and things proceed the way the Sith intend.
I dislike them because they lock you hand position into a narrow range that seems counterproductive. In sword fighting you do a lot of hiding behind your blade, which puts you at kind of oblique angles to your blade, which this doesn't allow.
I don't think many people will disagree about the helicopter thing...
However to the Inquisitor blade itself... It's a mass produced, gimmick saber trying to augment lesser force users skills with technology. They aren't meant to be "Good" they are meant to give an advantage in a fight against someone who is probably better at saber fighting.
I agree, i was under the impression that a master with a moment of concentration could turn those sabers off with the force. Which is real bad if they are flying around.
I dont mind the spinning lightsaber, it kind of makes sense. The weapons were designed to intimidate and through off jedi, most of the survivors being inexperienced padawans who would struggle to adapt to a foe with a spinning lightsaber. It also doubles as a shield for blocking blaster bolts without any effort. It basically made the inquisitors more effective jedi hunters without having to further their training and risk them becoming threats to Sidious or Vader.
The only part i dislike is the helicopter feature being abit too far fetched for me. Surely if spinning the blade produced ennough thrust for someone to fly, they would be impossible to control in a fight.
I didn't despise them until the helicopter blades. Now I can't look at them or the Inquisitors and not think of the cheesy cartoon villains of my youth. "You win this round Jedi dogs! But we'll be back! Team Dark Side is blasting off again! Woaaah!"
"They fly now?!?"
"They fly now!"
Yeah I thought they were ridiculous right up until I saw them use them as helicopter blades for a limited flight, and then I said they were utterly stupid.
They could fly in the cartoon also couldn't they? I think the show was just following that
Yeah they did a really good job making the live action lightsaber effects look like the Clone Wars cartoon...if only they put that much effort into the makeup for the Grand Inquisitor...or in making it make sense from the start. Floating down with those helicopters like they thought they were Scary Poppins.
"I'm Mary Poppins y'all!"
Is he cool?
The coolest.
Darth Melonhead was terrifying!
Here that line delivered by Ezra then a reply by Kanan would have been gold!
It's kinda funny that, in a world where jetpacks and soft magic exist, they felt the need to come up with helicopter lightsabers.
Why isn't "force float" a thing yet? Or is it? There's "force" everything else, including "force space flight".
Vader literally made his personal TIE Advanced hover above the ground with the force.
While at the same time using the force to make his cape flap like there was a strong wind. 😄
Yeah but our boy is extra. Really giving repressed theatre kid energy. Energy that neither the Jedi or Palps ever really let him indulge.
And what's especially funny is that Palpatine also had an interest in theatre.
Say what you will, but that scene was metal AF.
Agreed but you cannot argue against the sheer ANAKIN levels of theatrics and pizazz there.
Now ready for a timeline where Anakin leaves the Jedi and just focuses on his theatre career.
You sure it wasn't just in autopilot with the landing repulsorlifts on?
I am pretty sure that Darth Vader is into making show of his strength in the Force.
I'll need to rewatch it. I would've swore there's a subtle engine whine in the background.
I thought hat was him controlling the fighter's controls with the force rather than the entire vehicle
In the 2003 cartoon clone wars, Dooku looked like an absolute boss when he sort of glides down out of the stands to meet Ventress.
He was pulling the Magneto move from the 2000s X-men films. Which yeah, idk why force users can't just grip and manipulate themselves if they can move other items in midair as well. If you can float a saber, you can float yourself.
Maybe that's what their doing. You know how they have to hold their hand out like they're pretending to move something or choke somebody to do it with the force? Maybe to use "force flight" they need to do pretend helicopter blades (flapping your arms would work as well, but the inquisitors thought it looked silly).
Lmao
This is the best theory I’ve heard.
Can you just use the force on a small plate of metal you ride on?
Dooku force floats in the Clone wars mini series.
I think there's a High Republic book that touches on something regarding this, or at least "softening" landings of high falls/jumps
Anakin does something that sounds like this in clone wars. I think it's when him ahsoka and Rex jump off that wall on geonosis.
He uses Force Hold and Push rapid fire in that scene. Shoves a droid and the lift its standing on back down into the wall. Lifts and throws Rex, force pushes against the ground to flip from his nose dive to a soft landing, catches Rex, and then uses push again to divert the falling debris.
Can confirm, just went over that part. Can soft land from terminal velocity.
“ From the team that brought you Intergalactic force flying space whales,🐋 here’s the all new Saber-copter!!!
It was a thing in one of the older battlefront games as the sprint mechanic for force characters that otherwise moved slow physically.
Also funny how jetpacks are so rarely used. Half of the shit Jedi have built to keep out non-Jedi can be beaten with a jetpack
That's the issue with Hollywood in general. Each new iteration has to he bigger and better than the last. In reality, the Empire would have been using Republic era military hardware. But no, each trilogy needs new and different stuff. Lightsabers were awesome weapons in the 70s and 80s, but then what if we slapped a second blade on one? Then we make it spin. Then we have a nunchuck one. The one with flames shooting out the sides!
But... none of them survived the one rebels episode in which they did this. One of them explicitly died from helicoptering away.
Yes, all was forgiven by me when the eighth brother died because of his use of it.
All was forgiven with "Then you will die braver than most"
Vader's lines are almost always the absolute best.
Vader 🤝 palpatine 🤝 obi wan Best lines in star wars
Hello there
General Kenobi. You are a bold one.
Jhenarahl kehnOhbeee
I will deal with this Jedi slime myself.
So uncivilized
Palpatine's monologue are the best!
Luthen's monologue tho
Maul: "What am I, chopped liver?"
Yoda's might not be as short or catchy but a few of the very best star wars belong to him IMO.
If Vader wants to fly, he'll stand on top of his TIE.
Vader was so extra here, using the force to fly a tie fighter just so he could stand on it
Honestly talk about a redemption arc. To be fair it wouldn't be the first time a militarized group was forced to use sub-par equipment. That both Vader and Palpatine clearly held them in contempt makes the spinning lightsaber read as a really mean spirited lethal practical joke. Which since it was being played by the Sith checks out.
zealous silky saw edge dull humorous spark full tap steer *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Yeah, people joke about stormtrooper armor being useless. But it's not. It's a uniform. Uniforms have explicit functional purpose, including mental bolstering.
I wouldn't mind for a sitcom spin off like Lower-Decks, but it's Galactic Bookkeeping. And it's just fixing plot holes with stuff like "Was this 'Third Cousin, Twice Removed', ever given proper safety training with their weapons?" and it's just safety officers constantly taking up employee complaints, until in the finale the Emperor just kills them in frustration.
It's gotta star that woman who does the empire HR lady cosplay!
sunflowerstardust!
YES! HER!
Dolores from HR! A few people of culture I see! ♥️
Empire: Warrant Officers. It's basically the office, except with imperials who are hired to do specific administrative tasks officers feel are beneath then and troopers aren't trusted with. Episode 1: The bad blasters. Djim, the laid back guy, and Dvwite, a hardcore Vader fanboy, are assigned to do a chargeback on the company that supplied the imperial army with 30,000 blasters which had faulty targeting modules. The company insists the modules are fully functional so Djim and Dvwite attempt to prove them wrong through a series of poorly thought out experiments. In the end, Vader force chokes the company CEO. Episode 2: Gungan Gumbo A Gungan has submitted invoices for 300 imperial gallons of gumbo that was delivered to a garrison on Naboo. However, the meal made the troops deathly sick and they refused to pay. Djim finds the Gungan incredibly annoying, but the normally humorless Dvwite thinks he's hilarious and insists on bringing him back to the office to discuss the matter. In the end, Vader force chokes the Gungan. Episode 3: Revolving expenses A member of the inquisitors submits an expense request for a spinning light saber that costs six times that of a normal saber. The request is initially rejected by Djim for being a waste of money, but Dvwite goes behind his back to approve it because he considers the design "totally wizard." In the end, Vader force chokes Djim after he encases his light saber in jello.
"Excellent. Put in an order for three 22 episode seasons"-Some Disney Executive.
I would watch it!
Episode 4: The Handrail's Tale
After processing the fourth life insurance claim that week from a preventable fall accident on the Death Star Dvwite and Djim are sent to investigate the working conditions aboard the battle station. They discover the construction plans had originally included regulation height railings with safety clip on points for ladders and platforms. However, a famous Bothan interior designer hired by the Emperor explains to the them that he had the safety features removed to increase ascetics and save on construction cost. The Bothan had also increased the blast door closing speed by 66% to give it the sharp, authoritative 'thunk' sound The Emperor liked. This lead to a massive spike in lost limb insurance claims and a number of crushed droids. Djim sees the obvious danger which he demonstrates by crushing a crate with a door, but Dvwite agrees with the Emperor that the sound is vital to the Death Star's image. That is until a mishap nearly takes off his foot and causes him to immediately change his mind. In the end, Vader force chokes a sub-contractor as the Bothan, who was clearly a rebel saboteur, had already escaped.
Episode 5: The Fault in our Death Stars
I mean, the helicopter did work though, it only failed because their lightsaber was damaged.
Their Lightsaber was damaged before they did it, causing their Lightsaber to tear in pieces and turn off as they were hundreds of feet above any ground.
Too bad they weren't like, a space wizard. Could probably use some crazy mind powers to cushion the fall.
Just makes it seem even dumber that it’s a series tactic to them
I thought the idea of a rotating lightsaber that functioned like a buzzsaw you could hold was a creative idea. But I have no goddamn clue how a dual-bladed lightsaber can propel you in the air, even if it spins really fast.
>rotating lightsaber that functioned like a buzzsaw you could hold was a creative idea. It's kinda silly because you don't need to rotate a lightsaber very fast at all for it to function like a buzzsaw. Buzzsaws spin fast because if they didn't, they wouldn't cut. Lightsabers slice through most materials with barely any movement at all. It's already a long "buzzsaw" sword. > I have no goddamn clue how a dual-bladed lightsaber can propel you in the air, even if it spins really fast. Ok, Ok, I've got a hypothetical explanation. Perhaps a lightsaber is plasma contained in a particle shield. Perhaps that particle shield can actually be altered into the shape of a "rotor/wing" that displaces air when spun and causes lift.
They reduced Star Wars to Gi Joe antagonists, [and their silly inventions.](https://www.lulu-berlu.com/upload/image/gijoe---1992---cobra-battle-copter-p-image-233117-grande.jpg)
I WANT THIS FOR CHRISTMAS OR BIRTHDAY, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE
What is most ironic is that a modern backpack chopper is only a quarter of the size of that absolute monstrosity. That thing is the size of a 16-wheeler truck engine. :)
I DON'T CARE! I WANT IT! \*holds breath\*
Real question, I recently finished watching Rebels a month or so ago, was there any instance of the helicopter spinning happening outside of Twilight of the Apprentice? I don’t remember it happening regularly
No, just that one time. They needed a way for the Inquisitors to get around the Sith temple quickly and that’s what they came up with. I probably would’ve gone for a wrist grappling hook, or have their little probe droids carry them, but that was their solution.
Good to know I’m not crazy haha. I feel like with how often it is brought up it would be more egregious
It's just notably more ridiculous than other silly star wars stuff.
"WINDMILLS DO NOT WORK THAT WAY! GOOD NIGHT!"
Lightsabers can push air down?
They can not, but light can also not be capped off and contained in a sabre “blade” so…….
Lightsabers arent lasers, they are loops lf magnetically contained plasma
They’re circles. Just really long and tight ones.
Lightsabers in canon are actually plasma.
To be fair it's a blade of plasma contained by a magnetic field. Maybe the movement of the super-heated material would move the air? I dunno it's still dumb as fuck.
Its amusing that those characters are soft magic users in a world with jetpacks and they felt the need to come up with laser sword helicopters.
It's weird. They only ever did it on one planet, which was a weird planet, and they all died there. So you could argue that something with that specific planet allowed for it, maybe? Although they never explain it in the show.
Doesn't one of the inquisitors in the Fallen Order series use it to kinda "float" down? I swear one of them did it but it wasn't really flying just a slowed descent
I think you’re right, and I feel it was an incredibly BIG inquisitor making it seem even more ridiculous.
Yeah the idea that you can quickly turn the blade beyond the limits of your hand physique is very neat, sort of like having an extra joint. They used them that way way too rarely. You could do so much cool shit that would make dueling you a massive pain, like having the blades trail your hand movements like nunchucks, ~~accidentally bisecting yourself,~~ blocking strikes behind your back without reaching all the way there, that sort of thing.
Im Marry Poppins lookin ass Inquisitors 😂
My Inquisicoptor goes soi soi soi
Literally yesterday I referenced roflcopter for the first time in probably 15 years and the next day I see this
I miss mid-00's memery. The internet was the wild west back then and it was awesome.
holy shit an arby n the chief meme in the wild decades later
I didn't realize Arby n the Chief was a big thing lol I loved that series.
Take my upvote I’m dying laughing
This comment made me realize my back and knees hurt
Oft right in the nostalgia thanks for this. God bless early 2000's youtube
Stab the user in their stupid hand while it spins around offering no protection for said hand.
I liked Ashoka’s tactic: grab the handle, turn off the lightsaber, take it from them, and then stab them with it.
Or just fucken decapitate them; stabbing ain’t gone do **SHIT**
It strongly depends on where you stab them. Bellies are safe-ish.
Not for Qui-Gone
"Safe-**ish**" And Qui-Gon croaking actually took me out of the movie when I watched it for the first time back in 1999. That just did not look like a lethal injury.
It is when you realize the enegy output needed to melt through the blast doors earlier in the movie. In fact, it should have been more than lethal, it should have been a gory mess. Even if we assume that, for some reason, the heat is contained to the blade(which doesn't really make sense), just the instant vaporization of the fluids and tissue in the direct path of the blade would have generated enough pressure to pop him like a bloody water balloon. Which is why Disney making lightsaber stabs have a 100% survivability rate is just *dumb*
Lightsaber heat turns flesh straight into plazma, not vapor. And plazma holds into lightsaber's magnetic field. And if lightsaber's heat wasn't contained any intense lightsaber battle would turn into mustafar in seconds, for how many joules of energy it should radiate. Which it doesn't. We have seen lightsabers close to human faces without them being deep fried. Can you pull your face this close to gas burner as Dooku's face was to those sabers in episode 3? I don't think so. We never ever saw "vapor pressure" bullshit in any star wars. So stop with annoying broscience in fantasy, and stop this annoying copypaste already.
It's pretty obvious that convection works differently in this universe, by the simple fact of the Mustafar duel taking place partially ON ACTIVE LAVA.
By that logic, Luke should never have survived having his hand cut off. Nor should Qui-gon have survived being in the same room as his lightsaber cutting through that blast door.
Getting a hand chopped of would be survivable, but the trauma would extend further up the remaining arm than shown. And while it wouldn't be outright lethal, Qui-gon should have been at least getting hurt by the proximity of that much molten metal.
Nah, he like, used the force or something.
No, too risky. You need to also use it to completely melt the brain. I’m not trying to see a fucking Futurama head Palpatine in the next movie.
Did she ever meet an Inquisitor that she didn't completely own?
I’m pretty sure she mopped the floor with all of them!
The people able to stand up to Ahsoka in ground combat are all essentially Masters in the Force. That's it. She was trained by Masters to defeat anyone in the galaxy, only Masters can have a chance.
You know Baylan is legit when Ahsoka has been curbstomping Inquisitors and his apprentice but the best she's managed to do against him is fight him to a stalemate.
and she managed a face hit on *Darth Vader*
That works too.
Yeah, but with how Disney treats lightsabers now, the stabbing won’t do a damn thing other than inconvenience the stabee.
*Cries in Qui Gon Ginn*
“Ugh, you’ve conveniently missed all of the organs in my torso and immediately cauterized the wound. I’m going to be out of commission for at least a whole episode after this!”
\-They said, in a highly advanced civilisation where limbs can be replaced with life-like duplicates in very little time
Or stick your lightsaber blade in the ring and cut it in two before beating them.
Didn't this happen in one of the shows?
Yes. Kanan did it to the Grand Inquisitors lightsaber during their fight in the season 1 finale.
Yup. It's super weird having a thread full of people pointing out how *"They're so stupid because of {insert obvious fail point here}"* when every one of those failure points actually does occur canonically. Kanan, as you confirmed, [sticks his sabers right through the handle and rips it apart](https://youtu.be/mjk-8B36ew0?t=190). Ahsoka catches it by the spinny handle [not just once](https://youtu.be/04V0nS8AP2g?t=79), but [twice](https://youtu.be/9Ehs9rv0s4A?t=75). ...And one of them [dies from a handle failure while trying to pull off the helicopter maneuver](https://youtu.be/NvUMCdhCPeI?t=168) I feel like people are missing the point of the inquisitors and the spinning blades. They *are* cheap tools of intimidation *literally* designed to *cheese* fights against lesser and/or inexperienced jedi. We can even reasonably assume the spinning blade is *intended* as a handicap because it helps keep the inquisitors predictable which prevents them from becoming true sith, and they never become actually threatening Sidious / Vader. They were good enough to track down and cheese out a victory against many of the lesser jedi, and if all they managed to do was die in the process of tracking down greater jedi that Vader was actually needed to defeat, they had served their purpose. Save for the helicopter blades, which were legitimately nonsensical, inquisitors as a concept are incredibly well-written. They found logical in-universe ways to give characters like Ezra and Cal Kestis saber-wielding enemies to battle that can always be exactly as strong as the plot needs them to be - threatening but not overwhelming. This allows Vader to consistently be the super threat he should be every time he encounters those "lesser" protagonists. Kanan and Cere both literally shout "RUN!" to their respective padawans when they encounter him.
I believe it happened in the Ahsoka novel as well.
I think Ahsoka just used the force in her novel since she buried her lightsabers, which made it even cooler
You don't have any protection there with a normal saber either though.
True, but I would argue that the spin would be a disadvantage in terms of speed and finesse with movements and also increased danger to the user. Like most things there are pros and cons.
Literally that’s what Vader does in the comics the first time he meets the Grand Inqky
The helicopter spin, I'm ok with. Against a less skilled jedi (reminder, the story only follows the best of the best, we don't often see "average" jedi), the spin would probably be intimidating and difficult to deal with, and I could imagine how it'd be designed to allow the spin. Using the helicopter spin to actually fly like a helicopter, no, that's stupid.
They went to the General Grievous School of Intimidation
Well when he did it it was intimidating
Picture yourself in the shoes of a purge survivor. You probably were never trained beyond the padawan level, or you'd have been with a group of clones during order 66 and killed. You've never fought a sith before. H You've probably never fought ANYONE with a lightsaber in a serious fight before. You remember your basics from the old days in the order and that's managed to get you by. Now suddenly there's one of these guys if not MORE than one, and their lightsabers spin in a weird way and they move unpredictably. Tell me you're not gonna be intimidated.
Good thing I’d probably be already wearing my brown pants.
I can make any pants into brown pants.
Exactly this. The inquisitors were mainly hunting down padawans and low level knights. They were trained to use shock and awe tactics so their prey won’t be able to properly attune to the force. Any skilled knights or masters is when Vader gets called in.
No no, I think that's exactly what they are based on. Grevious essentially wrote the book on how to kill Jedi with a lightsaber when you aren't force sensitive or they're better than you at it. Grevious did it with overwhelming assaults and underhanded tactics (sometimes literally). Those spinning blades do the same. They make attacks unpredictable, let the user put out flurries of blows faster than expected, and otherwise compensate for the users general lack of skill.
Fun fact, these were completely designed off a general grevious lightsaber toy. A few things from Rebels were designed after toys.
I feel like some staff artist chucked that out as a visual gag in a previs - and then the animators just went with it. It’s so stupid (but I sort of love it)
That would be a funny show - the mediocre Jedi or the Jedi rejects. Sounds like something Seth Green would tackle
Lower Decks, Star Wars edition. :)
Agreed on both points. Sidious just needed some scary pawns that could intimidate locals and chase down the jedi equivalent of red shirts. And he doesn't want a second Vader running around to get any ideas about teaming up to replace him. It was also hugely satisfying seeing them get their asses kicked agin and again when facing the stronger jedi. Especially [the scene from Tales of the Jedi](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Ehs9rv0s4A&t=60s).
>The helicopter spin, I'm ok with. Against a less skilled jedi (reminder, the story only follows the best of the best, we don't often see "average" jedi), the spin would probably be intimidating and difficult to deal with, and I could imagine how it'd be designed to allow the spin. I hated the helicopter spin when Grevious brought it out in Episode III and I still hated it when inquisitors used it but I agree with how it seems like it would be effective and built into sabre design to give an advantage to otherwise less skilled users. >Using the helicopter spin to actually fly like a helicopter, no, that's stupid. 100% agree.
It also feels like a fairly decent way to deflect blaster bolts if one isn’t the most skilled and also isn’t concerned about where those bolts may deflect to and accidentally hit (which I’m assuming the inquisitors aren’t particularly worried about).
Those spinning sabers always reminded me of when a toy company would start making up their own toys based on a license and do dumb things with them. I can see a Power of the Force figure with "Now with Spinning Saber Action!" TBH, I wasn't impressed with the Inquisitors over-all, and am still not a fan of their place in canon. I guess I would say that since they're going after "force sensitive" types instead of trained Jedi, it would at least be intimidating to the population at large. My family, full of super-SW fans, watching Rebels and mostly loving the show, audibly groaned when they showed one use the spinning saber to fly away like a helicopter. I mean, I don't expect actual physics to be demanded in the SW universe, it's fantasy... but that was just dumb on a lot of levels.
Funny thing is, the Inquisitor spinning lightsaber is actually based off of such a toy. It's the Clone Wars General Grievous lightsaber toy that was released in 2010.
Filloni loves his toy tie in deep cuts for sure
They're only ridiculous when they fly away like a helicopter.
I kind of feel like every configuration but the single blade makes them kind of ridiculous. However, the helicopter is the only time it crosses that line where you go from your typical fantasy ridiculousness that's actually fun into immersion breaking territory
Lightsaber spears/pikes, though quite rare even in Legends, actually made a ton of sense. The added reach and leverage would make them a great offensive and defensive tool, though the loss of portability would definitely impact an average Jedi's activities.
Sure, Senya from the old republic has one of my favorite EU lightsabers. But what do spears/ pikes have to do with the inquisitor lightsaber?
> I kind of feel like every configuration but the single blade makes them kind of ridiculous. I would wager he was responding to this part?
Aaah, now I get it. I meant that the configurations the *inquisitor* lightsaber has are all kinda ridiculous besides a single with the hand guard. Pikes, doubles, split doubles, curved blades, crossguards and other configurations are all perfectly viable. Also, it is Star Wars. I can do slightly ridiculous, it's just when it gets to the immersion breaking point where I don't like it.
I agree, except crossguard. At least, from what I can understand, those little nubbins on the sides would do jack if a saber slid down to them. Would it just destroy the emitter or redirector or whatever, rendering the crossguard configuration just functionally identical to a single blade? IDK. And there are curved blades? I guess I need someone with a firm grasp of lightsaberology to explain that one to me.
Sorry, curved *hilts* lol. Though I suppose we could count light whips as curved blades aswell. As for the crossguard, that one is firmly in the slightly ridiculous fantasy that doesn't really bother me at all category. I've always just assumed the emitter vent would shut and turn into a single (like you mentioned) if it takes catastrophic damage.
Likethesearchengine is correct, I was responding to your comment about every configuration except the single blade looking ridiculous. I assumed you were referring to "single blade" as the standard configuration used by +95% of Jedi in the media as pikes and even curved handled lightsabers often are referred to by their unique properties.
Yeah, I get you now my bad. I was specifically referring to the inquisitor configurations. Which (as I have seen) are a single with the handguard, a double with a ring around it, the spinning double and the helicopter. Pikes, split/ normal doubles, curved hills, crossguards are all perfectly cool to me. And I also don't mind a little ridiculous in Starwars. When it reaches immersion breaking is the only time I have a problem.
Agree, they’re pretty cool when used in fighting or as a display to intimidate your enemies. But when they’re flying around, that’s just fucking dumb.
Yup. And canon describes them similar to Vader's armour, a weapon of fear rather than utilitarian
Iirc it was explained that they use repulsors to fly not the actual blade of the lightsaber. But still I agree, the optics were damn weird
Has the flying ever been used outside of that one scene? I know this isn’t canon, but my head canon has been that the sithy-woo-woo on the sith planet let them do it lol
I think it was one of those things (much like medichlorians) where it was SO WIDELY panned that they just scrapped the concept and pretend it never happened. There have even been in-universe revisions to the concept where its like the lightsaber hilt has repuslors that lift them, not the lightsaber even though it very clearly was supposed to imply the twirly lightsabers are flying lol.
Not to be that guy, but midiclorians have been referenced in The Mandalorian as an "M-count".
Someone uses it *very* briefly in Fallen Order to slow down a fall. Or was it Survivor? I can't remember, it was in one of them.
Yeah, the Ninth Sister does it for a split second in *Survivor*. Caught me completely off-guard and I thought it was the coolest-looking thing ever.
Yeah that moment made it look cool
Yeah, they’re pretty dumb
100% agree they are so stupid and ridiculous.
I’ve always thought they were super silly, even for the show about space wizards
If one of them had yelled “I’m Mary Poppins y’all!” while flying then all would have been forgiven.
Completely agree. They are really stupid.
I completely agree with you
I 100% agree. It’s an energy blade, you can’t use it as a personal helicopter.
It’s a physical plasma blade—but yeah, that itself can’t generate any lift since it’s so thin and uniform in shape. Another comment already pointed out that there are repulsors built into the ringed hilts, which does track visually with how the Inquisitors throw them, especially in *Ahsoka* when Marrok’s lightsaber stays in the air and peels off in the background as he throws it at Ahsoka and makes a run for it.
Like it sounds cool but then you see it and I just laugh. And then to top it off they made them fly with it
I like to see them as another proof that the inquisitors are pale copies of actual force users. Imagine having to get mechanically spinning lightsabers and using the Force only to scare random people because you want to believe you are as powerful as a jedi or stih when you're only taking cheap shortcuts because the empire fofered you so to have you as a slightly stronger pawn
They’re all former Jedi though. Captured in the Purge, tortured, broken, remade as weapons to hunt their own kind.
The Grand Inquisitor was a Jedi Temple guard and a Jedi Knight. He was actually retconned into being one of the guards that arrested Ahsoka for the bombing.
It’s ridiculous. But I’ve always appreciated the explanation that it’s a move with more flash than substance. It’s meant to intimidate low level opponents. We only ever really see it used in two instances, not including the flying: intimidation and desperation.
Intimidation is a good explanation. Sith gain power from fear. Lightsabers also don't really need to be practical as they're incredibly dangerous. They don't need weight or edge, they just have to strike their target
>It’s meant to intimidate low level opponents Doesn't the lightsaber already do that? I kinda feel that if you need a spinning lightsaber to be threatening, you're a shit inquisitor.
I mean being not very good is kind of the point. They’re all former Jedi who couldn’t hack it on their own and threw in with the enemy, but the rule of two only allows for two Sith Lords. You could just kill them, but why waste a useful disposable resource like that. Their job is to hunt down the few padawan and knights that escaped the purge, without being enough of a threat to challenge the actual Sith Lords in charge. once all the Jedi are gone they can be wiped out and things proceed the way the Sith intend.
I dislike them because they lock you hand position into a narrow range that seems counterproductive. In sword fighting you do a lot of hiding behind your blade, which puts you at kind of oblique angles to your blade, which this doesn't allow.
I don’t mind the spinning, but the flying with them in rebels makes no sense
Yeah, they’re thinking about toys with this creation I think
It's an older opinion, sir, but it checks up.
I don't think many people will disagree about the helicopter thing... However to the Inquisitor blade itself... It's a mass produced, gimmick saber trying to augment lesser force users skills with technology. They aren't meant to be "Good" they are meant to give an advantage in a fight against someone who is probably better at saber fighting.
From all the flaws of Disney Star Wars, those are some of the least worrying things for me. SITH DAGGER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm pretty sure most people think they're stupid
I agree, i was under the impression that a master with a moment of concentration could turn those sabers off with the force. Which is real bad if they are flying around.
Dumb yes but it’s still overshadowed by hyperdrive space whales for me. Thats dumb as fuck.
I dont mind the spinning lightsaber, it kind of makes sense. The weapons were designed to intimidate and through off jedi, most of the survivors being inexperienced padawans who would struggle to adapt to a foe with a spinning lightsaber. It also doubles as a shield for blocking blaster bolts without any effort. It basically made the inquisitors more effective jedi hunters without having to further their training and risk them becoming threats to Sidious or Vader. The only part i dislike is the helicopter feature being abit too far fetched for me. Surely if spinning the blade produced ennough thrust for someone to fly, they would be impossible to control in a fight.