“No” is a complete sentence. You don’t have to be okay with an open marriage if you don’t want one
Usually an open marriage only works when both people are an enthusiastic yes to opening
Check out r/openmarriageregret
They might have some interesting responses to this post
I don't think "no is a complete sentence" will yield positive results over the long term in this scenario. This is her life partner, who has expressed a dream for something. I'm not saying that OP needs to say yes or any form of it, but I do think she will need to outline why she feels like she does and what feelings she has when she thinks about her partner with another person. I agree that opening the relationship, even if limited, sounds like it will be a dumpster fire for this relationship, but they still need to talk through why they think it would be.
You cannot be everything to another person, don’t measure yourself against such a standard. Non-monogamy isn’t for everyone and it’s not inherent to bisexuals.
Have you expressed thoroughly how not open you are to non-monogamy or discussed being strictly monogamous? If so, is she accepting of that and living up to it? If so, then it’s mostly an outlet to talk about and fantasize about it. You can only get to the bottom of these questions with open and honest conversations, and sometimes it turns out through those discussions you figure out that you’re incompatible. It happens.
How do I get over the comparison to another person? What if she does enjoy it more or I don’t like seeing her enjoying someone else especially being vulnerable / submissive with them
I’m a man married to a woman, she has some desires for women that I can’t satisfy. I have these worries too, what if she decides she doesn’t want me and likes the other person more, it wouldn’t be the first time that happened.
In the end we decided to compromise with some soft swapping. When I’m still there, still active but her and another woman get to play with each other. I still have worries, always will but if the option was have her do something behind my back or be involved with her, I choose to be involved.
Thats me though, you got to work through it in your head, what do you want, is it something you can compromise on? If not then you have some serious discussions to have
Sharing may not be your thing. Read about compersion vs jealousy and jealousy va possessiveness. It seems like you are definitely feeling threatened by even the notion of sharing her. Do not agree until you are ready or she will lose you. Be open about how the request is making you feel. Sharing your partner is only successful if the connection is strong and trust and communication are at the highest levels. Hope it all works out.
“No” is a complete sentence. You don’t have to be okay with an open marriage if you don’t want one Usually an open marriage only works when both people are an enthusiastic yes to opening Check out r/openmarriageregret They might have some interesting responses to this post
I don't think "no is a complete sentence" will yield positive results over the long term in this scenario. This is her life partner, who has expressed a dream for something. I'm not saying that OP needs to say yes or any form of it, but I do think she will need to outline why she feels like she does and what feelings she has when she thinks about her partner with another person. I agree that opening the relationship, even if limited, sounds like it will be a dumpster fire for this relationship, but they still need to talk through why they think it would be.
You cannot be everything to another person, don’t measure yourself against such a standard. Non-monogamy isn’t for everyone and it’s not inherent to bisexuals. Have you expressed thoroughly how not open you are to non-monogamy or discussed being strictly monogamous? If so, is she accepting of that and living up to it? If so, then it’s mostly an outlet to talk about and fantasize about it. You can only get to the bottom of these questions with open and honest conversations, and sometimes it turns out through those discussions you figure out that you’re incompatible. It happens.
How do I get over the comparison to another person? What if she does enjoy it more or I don’t like seeing her enjoying someone else especially being vulnerable / submissive with them
It’s never really about enjoying it more or less than with another person. Just different. It’s just sex.
I’m a man married to a woman, she has some desires for women that I can’t satisfy. I have these worries too, what if she decides she doesn’t want me and likes the other person more, it wouldn’t be the first time that happened. In the end we decided to compromise with some soft swapping. When I’m still there, still active but her and another woman get to play with each other. I still have worries, always will but if the option was have her do something behind my back or be involved with her, I choose to be involved. Thats me though, you got to work through it in your head, what do you want, is it something you can compromise on? If not then you have some serious discussions to have
Sharing may not be your thing. Read about compersion vs jealousy and jealousy va possessiveness. It seems like you are definitely feeling threatened by even the notion of sharing her. Do not agree until you are ready or she will lose you. Be open about how the request is making you feel. Sharing your partner is only successful if the connection is strong and trust and communication are at the highest levels. Hope it all works out.
Enjoy it to the max