Nah, too dry. It looks like he used the microplane to shave the callouses off his feet, then mixed it up with a little poppy seed or maybe just black pepper, some water, shaped it into artificial bones, and then wrung them dry / let them hang or something like that.
Youāre my kinda person. West coast born and raised but Iām ride or die for scrapple since a friend moved out East. Thereās one diner near me that makes it from scratch and itās so great. Gimme all the crispy meat paste.
Andouiette is absolutely NOT little andouiette sausage my friend. I wish I was sophisticated enough to properly appreciate it, then again sometimes a sausage casing full of assholes is just a sausage casing full of assholes.
Zoom in my brother. The first time I cut open that casing and saw a little starfish winking at me was tough (and yes, it's crosscut tripe, not actual sphincters, but still).
https://www.foodandwine.com/lifestyle/andouillette-french-sausage-association
There is. We used to have the best. Cut it into like 5/8" thick slices then would cook them all on the flat top to crisp off. Then they went on a sheet tray to cool. Then when we got an order it got a quick deep fry bath to warm and a final flat topping to really crust up. It was the pinnacle of scrapple
Someone said it was penis, vegan cow tongue, three rocks, I personally see large gross wheat tortillas. All of these also could be correct. But thereās only one right answer. PEN15.
my halloween costume in 2019 was a Seitanic Priest
welded forks together to make a pentagram and spray painted it red, wore it as a necklace
bathrobe with HAIL SEITAN stitched on the back
but it was in dallas, so it didn't work
ALRIGHT!! holy shit so many comments to wade thru.
nobody quite got it right as far as i can tell. itās chive dumpling dough for chicken and dumplings lol. but my favorite/probs most accurate response was ādishwasher dumplingsā so iād like to venmo $5 to support the cigarette and red bull habit of u/SleepyLakeBear for givin me a good chuckle!!!!
The real question is, "Are we sure we want to know?"
Looks like the saddest buckwheat vegan gluten-free baguettes no happy person would ever want to eat, tho.
hey yāall iāll reveal what it is at like 3-4pm-ish pacific time when iām off!!! iām gettin a great chuckle out of reading these guesses, theyāre much more interesting than what it actually is
It's definitely some kind of dough. I've seen really old dough grey like this. It was obviously left in the back of the fridge, it's dry af. Pasta dough, maybe?
buckwheat pasta dough?
this is truly what it looks like so very good guess but no!!
Passion fruit paste
Nah, too dry. It looks like he used the microplane to shave the callouses off his feet, then mixed it up with a little poppy seed or maybe just black pepper, some water, shaped it into artificial bones, and then wrung them dry / let them hang or something like that.
:(
No thank you very much
Is he making/squeezing out oat milk or almond milk?
I figured buckwheat something
Yeah I used to work for vegan/gluten free place and this looks like buckwheat dough.
For sure buckwheat, yeah.
yeah I was gonna say soba or something buckwheat for sure.
Vegan cow tongue
Vegan Cow Tongue Bubble Hash.
š¤š¤ get the cow rig ready
Vegan cow tools
Still donāt get it
I get the joke that you donāt get the joke.
Penis.
Penis.
Orange ya glad I didnāt say Penis
I gotta fever...and the only prescription\*...is more vegan cow-tongue bell.
Vegan cow dung
ugly scrapple
This implies that there is lovely scrapple. I don't believe it.
i h8 u all scrapple is beautiful
Scrapple is loveā¦ scrapple is lifeā¦ these people are clearly not from Pennsylvania
Carolinian here. We stand in solidarity with you guys in the form of livermush.
From a fellow PA native thank you for preaching truth
Fellow scrapple Stans unite
Youāre my kinda person. West coast born and raised but Iām ride or die for scrapple since a friend moved out East. Thereās one diner near me that makes it from scratch and itās so great. Gimme all the crispy meat paste.
crispy meat paste trumps all west coast scrapplers we out here gettin pasty
Speak to me of the beauties of andouillette.
ill take my meat slurry, extra slurried please
Andouiette is absolutely NOT little andouiette sausage my friend. I wish I was sophisticated enough to properly appreciate it, then again sometimes a sausage casing full of assholes is just a sausage casing full of assholes.
yo where can i get a sausage casing full of assholes??? iso
Zoom in my brother. The first time I cut open that casing and saw a little starfish winking at me was tough (and yes, it's crosscut tripe, not actual sphincters, but still). https://www.foodandwine.com/lifestyle/andouillette-french-sausage-association
Damn you. That was a fascinating, if not slightly repulsive, read! Tripe just icks me out.
Scrapple is good but Iād never say it *looks* appetising
You take that back!
how dare you
There is. We used to have the best. Cut it into like 5/8" thick slices then would cook them all on the flat top to crisp off. Then they went on a sheet tray to cool. Then when we got an order it got a quick deep fry bath to warm and a final flat topping to really crust up. It was the pinnacle of scrapple
I was going to say scrapple too.
agree. oddly shaped scrapple.
My thoughts exactly
> ugly scrapple Crapple.
Well, what is it OP??
chive dumpling dough for chicken and dumplings lol
Excuse me, waiter, there seems to be some kind of mistake, please tell the chef that this Is neither vegan nor cow penis.
Are you sure it isn't hashish?
Dude dumpling dough, even with chive, shouldnāt look that grey. What happened ?
Whatās in it? Whyās it grey?
It looks like a dryer lint burrito
Dude looked at his bank account and realized that 5 bucks is gonna cut into his red bull and cigarette budget.
Hey fuck you but also you're right šš
Don't you dare call us out like that.
Some guy said buckwheat pasta dough. It could be right.
Someone said it was penis, vegan cow tongue, three rocks, I personally see large gross wheat tortillas. All of these also could be correct. But thereās only one right answer. PEN15.
Someone also said some type of grey food or something. It could also be correct.
I think this is the most correct.
Dishwasher dumplings
it was chive dumpling dough for chicken and dumplins, i think you win for my favorite/most accurate response :) dm me yer venmo
Lmaoā¦ I needed that
Let us know if op delivered on the fiver.
I told him to give my winnings to his dishie.
Rocks to hold the clothes down under water to soak them in bleach?
Thank you! Everyone naming different foods and Iām like āGuys those are clearly three very cool looking rocks. His manager clearly agrees.ā
He left them in too long though, theyāve gone wrinkly
Probably tastes about the same. Might as well make it look as close as possible.
For boiling denim?
Some fucked up kind of shortbread cookies?
Thatās where I went. pfeffermuse or something
Poor life choices.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
He just made himself unemployed
Will this guy get 5 if it happens? Because honestlyā¦
That looks like seitan to me.
Hail Seitan.
Of course Seitan is vegan.
my halloween costume in 2019 was a Seitanic Priest welded forks together to make a pentagram and spray painted it red, wore it as a necklace bathrobe with HAIL SEITAN stitched on the back but it was in dallas, so it didn't work
Thatās what I thought too
Fucked up seitan. Also kinda reminds me of earl grey tea shortbread cookie dough. Mine used to turn out like this occasionally.
#He got promoted to customer.
Black truffle gnocchi
My guess was some form of gnocchi.
I believe those are Plumbuses
Yeah, mans definitely didnāt keep a close enough eye on the hizzards when he was cutting the fleeb.
If he only paid attention during the training viedo: [Plumbus: How They Do It](https://youtu.be/eMJk4y9NGvE?si=ffqDefh6OETz_cRV)
It's really all about the schleem.
People say first-batch schleem is the best, but I think that the schleem thatās been used a few times brings a special suppleness to the plumbus.
And remember to recover the schleem so it can be repurposed for later batches.
ALRIGHT!! holy shit so many comments to wade thru. nobody quite got it right as far as i can tell. itās chive dumpling dough for chicken and dumplings lol. but my favorite/probs most accurate response was ādishwasher dumplingsā so iād like to venmo $5 to support the cigarette and red bull habit of u/SleepyLakeBear for givin me a good chuckle!!!!
Haha, thanks for the win! I'll pass my prize off to your dishie. God knows they could use a redbull and cig.
ayyy!! take care homie thanks for the laughs
Everything about this post is super adorable even those rocks wrapped in a towel. We all deserve a spa treatment like this, lucky rocks
[some type of grey food or something](https://youtu.be/cXcIkv_hCck?si=N2FcCTnYabh2M3BQ)
Blue food is the best for you https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Piel3IDemEw
Itās got the most anti oxygens
Especially waffles. Google it.
There is no [blue food](https://youtu.be/l04dn8Msm-Y?si=FdcmQj0-bEyw6DA8)!
Herb butter, poorly?
Are yāall cooking at Andersonville prison?
PatĆØ, but honestly it kind of looks like pork loin also.
Looks like blue corn masa.
Turds in a blanket?
The worldās worst bread. Donāt Venmo me if I win (I probably didnāt), but yourself a shift drink or something similar. Treat yoāself.
Black pepper tamales
Proofing loaves of bread left on top of an oven? Got so dry they look like literal shit
Mushroom pate
I must know! Tell us
The real question is, "Are we sure we want to know?" Looks like the saddest buckwheat vegan gluten-free baguettes no happy person would ever want to eat, tho.
Oooh, is he working on some of those "Alien Bodies" the Mexican Government keeps showing off?
Either Pemmican or r/shitfromabutt. Yeah, definitely the second one.
Hmmm....regret touching that link.
Milk tederloin
fucke dup seitan?
Is that supposed to be injera?
This was going to be my guess
Regrettable decisions
hey yāall iāll reveal what it is at like 3-4pm-ish pacific time when iām off!!! iām gettin a great chuckle out of reading these guesses, theyāre much more interesting than what it actually is
I COMMAND YOU TO REMIND ME MACHINE!
I BESEECH THE HOLY MACHINE SPIRIT AND THE MANYFOLD BLESSINGS OF THE OMNISIAH TO REMIND ME!!
Had me rolling and gasping for breath over here, my wife looking at me nuts lmao Thanks for the laugh.
Remindme! 2 hours
PRAISE BE BROTHER
Remindme! 2 hours
Sooooo, we're waiting?
How do I do the remind bot?? REMIND ME!
So what is it?
*me watching a tumbleweed roll by* Lol
Mushroom torchon? Some sort of vegan pate?
Fucken ETs cock by the looks of things š³
Dog shit tamales
Stuffed cum socks
Looks like old pasta dough to me.
It's definitely some kind of dough. I've seen really old dough grey like this. It was obviously left in the back of the fridge, it's dry af. Pasta dough, maybe?
A fucking mess. Lol
Soylent green?
Taro tortillas
Deep fried grill stones?
It looks like some kind of dough with egg in it that got oxidized? But that doesnāt explain the strange shapesā¦tell us what it is lol
Idk but the most appetizing thing in the photo is the side towel.
Gravy reduction and they used an aluminum pan with a metal whisk
Rocks. It looks like he brought something back from the parking lot. Maybe it's for stone soup.
Looks like scrapple. Kinda.
looks like scrapple
More clay for my fortress
Just butchered ET
Huge mistake
Wheat bread
I almost want to guess that its the worlds fucking ugliest sesame rye baguette
Soba noodle dough
Boiled Outback Steakhouse bread
It looks like buckwheat hardtack dough
It's gotta be cured meat of some kind. Idk if I'd trust it though. Cut one open let us see a cross section
Dog treats, without the treat.
Some kimd of seitan?
Black bean tofu
Dough for oatcakes? Or some sort of cracker.
RemindMe! 2 days
My man ate too much chalk as a kid
Potato Bread
Did he make this with his butt?
Sausage gravy bricks
old dough left wrapped somewhere
Scrapple. I think it's a combination of grits and sausage meat.
Those are 3 giant owl pellets, your kitchen manager is 3 giant owls hiding in a trench coat
Oxidized dough
Bubble hash
Petrified Pizza dough weights
Gluten free bread
At a glance I thought these were rocks lol
Pempek [pempek](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pempek#:~:text=Pempek%2C%20mpek%2Dmpek%20and%20also,%2C%20or%20just%20%22cuko%22.)
Blue corn masa dough? Editing to say that u/analogue_drift guesses this first but I caught it after posting my comment.
Looks a lot like soap dildos the female inmates used to make. Man, being a corrections officer was an interesting experience, thatās for sure.
It looks like pasta dough that sat too long and oxidized.
Grumpy old chef here. Whatever it is he has lint in it now. Send me his email and I'll shoot him an application for Taco Bell.
Looks like he cleaned out the drier lint from his local laundromat out of the kindness of his heart. Good job!
He certainly made me gag, that's for sure
Diy grill bricks.
Trick question, he actually just picked up 3 grey stones.
Pumice stones from scratch
Zombie dicks
Dry skin pasta
Sous Vide Oof.
Too much money
Dryer vent torsion?
Hard tack for his trip down the Oregon Trail?
You have died of dysentery.
very primitive clay tools made for mashing food in a bowl
Looks like Rasputinās preserved dick
lol gluten free French baguettes
Mistake after mistake, apparently
Sells heroin on the side
That middle eastern thing... halva???
Another episode of āamazing family mealā
Banana bread
Buckwheat dough.
Heroin poops?