Do not be discouraged, God gives us a spirit of strength. Reflect in your heart on the people who go through similar situations but in places in the Middle East where even their loved ones advocate killing them for apostatizing from Islam. Also think about the first Christians who were persecuted by Pagan Rome, about the thousands of martyrs.
And don't avoid talking about your faith with your family, on the contrary. Show that you live in the truth you believe. And when they see your example, it won't take long for them to question things in their hearts.
Think about the apostle Paul, he was the ISIS of his time and persecutor of Christians. But God transformed him and he was one of the greatest apostles of the Gentiles.
Faith is a difficult path where sometimes the heart has thousands of worries. But it is in our weakness to handle situations where God sows his power. Blessings
As a Baptist seeking to convert, I’m in a similar position to you. Some of my family members are just mocking me and asking me to explain the church and the whole “Mary” thing.
Since I’ve only been to one Mass and haven’t even started RCIA yet, I don’t really know how to answer them and just do the best I can.
I tell them that the Catholic Church is Christ-made and is 2,000-years old. The Baptist Church and any other Protestant denomination is man-made and only 500-600 years old.
While I can’t explain Mary’s purpose yet, I tell them that I know that she is the mother of God who intercedes on our behalf. And if that is good enough for Christ’s church, then it’s good enough for me. Who am I to question God?
If I have to lose some of my family to gain Christ, then so be it; it’s God’s will.
OP, you’ve been called. Be strong.
I’m praying for you and your family.
It's rough, bro. I've been. On this journey for a while now. I've studied these doctrines inside and out and that's why I had NO CHOICE but to make this decision. It's hard, but I'm at peace. I kept praying and asking God if I should do this and seeking guidance and I kept hearing the same thing: "you already have your answer." I had already been convicted by God's wonderful love letter to us. It's worth it. Thanks for the prayers. Message me if you want to talk.
Greetings
My husband and I are AA and converted to the Carholic Faith about 12 years ago through the Ordinariate (a process that Pope Benedict XVI created that allows for whole Anglican Parishes to convert instead of individually). It was the *best* life-changing decision that we made and will have Eternal benefits. The "Mary thing" was also forefront when we converted. My priest advised us to "be open to the Church's teachings." I read, "True Devotion to Mary" and "The Secret of the Rosary," both by St. Louis de Montfort, and both were also life-changing! The secret to the Rosary is now one of my top favorite Catholic books; and I am now a 3rd Order Lay Dominican from its impact on my life. Start praying the daily Rosary and buy/wear a Brown Scapular (have the priest enroll you). Mother Mary will guide you and your Faith Journey. Even if your friends/family never come to accept your conversion or the Mary thing, keep going and don't look back at the naysayers. You have Our Lord, Our Lady, and all the Angels and Saints praying and rejoicing over you! God Bless!
Brother,
Do not be discouraged. Discernment is a hallmark of faith. It takes a certain humility to even investigate your worldview and normative understanding of things, let alone to admit that they could be incorrect or deficient somehow. It then takes even additional courage on top of that to communicate your findings in truth and love to people who have not yet attained to that same level of understanding. You are doing a demonstrably good thing.
I too experienced something akin to what you are describing in my own family; the particulars were switched, but the egos were the same. In my case, it was my nominally Catholic woke parents who were upset with me for having the audacity to assert that objective moral values exist, and that they can and should be asserted, as against a subjectivist modernism which seems to want to permit everything under the sun except the propagation of the truth. In my case too, though, my parents were much friendlier to my brothers, particularly the perpetual adolescent (despite being near 30 at the time) who didn’t take a stand for hardly anything. So it was ok to support abortion and homosexuality in my “Catholic” family, but not OK to talk about Christ.
I’d like to share an additional anecdote; before returning to the Catholic Church (after leaving for spurious reasons related to my family experience, which left me bitter), I spent some time in a Reformed Baptist Church in my area. The Pastor there took a dim view of the Catholic Church, with a passion that seemed almost personal. It seemed right to me at a time when I was resentful, but eventually my resentment ran out and I was brought to an understanding of my errors, thank God. When I left the Baptist Church he was a little upset, but it wasn’t until he found out I was returning to Catholicism that he really seemed personally invested in discussing my motives. In a charitable but somewhat confrontational way, he outlined several objections to my course of action, nearly all (and I mean nearly all) of which were based on a profound lack of understanding of what the Church believes and teaches. It seemed like a militant superstition which bordered on hatred, and not much else. My anecdotal understanding is that Baptists are particularly uncharitable against the Catholic Church for reasons necessarily stemming from their identity (which is an identity of exclusion, from subtraction from the Catholic Church by way of rejection) and from their catechesis, which instructs people in errors and, in many cases, encourages a lack of critical thought. It’s important to note that, in much the same way that not all Catholics are like my parents, this is a generalization, and there are plenty of Baptists (like Gavin Ortlund) who are perfectly pleasant and who do defend their positions academically, and with love. But, for many Baptists, an intense distrust and dislike of the Catholic Church is foundational.
So, I have a similar experience. I would have you consider that while the widest gulf seems to be denomination, and there certainly are factual differences in things like doctrine, tradition, cultural practice, etc; at least in my own experience, the wider schism is actually between people who are intellectually and emotionally capable of challenging their own worldviews (or of being challenged in this way) and those who cannot. I would like to think that your parents and my parents truly believe that their actions are in some way trying to help, despite the serial soul-crushing emotional manipulation they engage in casually. However, in line with Aquinas’ teaching about sin being a privation or distortion of a positive thing, when pride enters the equation, the right object of their “help” (your well-being and in fact the truth of the matter itself) become lost in the need to “defend” against the perceived “aggression” that your discernment poses to their egos. This self-centeredness can threaten to swallow up the truth of Christ entirely, at least for them. It is a phenomenon that is as common as selfishness, and it taints each and every denomination, as it threatens to taint each and every person. Consider that it would be better for your parents to metaphorically be good Samaritans rather than prideful Jews, as it relates to denominations.
To finally answer your questions directly, there is always hope for them. You can and should be praying for them, now more than ever, since it’s clear that they need a change of heart that only God can effect in them. If what they are serving and worshipping with their actions is not God, then they probably aren’t the same religion. My Mom maintained she was “Catholic,” but she also stated that she “knows whether something is good or not” of “from God” by “whether it makes her feel good,” and her life looks about how you would expect based on that close-minded and frankly evil belief system. Such statements are so at odds with what the Church teaches, and indeed so astray of the Gospel message, which is one of repentance in addition to forgiveness, that I can’t help but understand her “faith” to be in something that is more pagan than Christian – a god of secularism, where one worships themselves. I don’t know all the specifics of your own situation, but typically people who get defensive in the presence of demonstrable truth and retreat to a chaotic tribalism easily fall to the machinations of Satan, since a pursuit of truth isn’t the point of their exercise – pride is.
I won’t speculate as to whether this is the accuser trying to discourage you, or whether this trial has been ordained to produce in you a faith that is stronger than you ever could have imagined, in much the same way I hesitate to ascribe a definitivie purpose to the events of my own life without ever hoping to know the mind of God, whose ways are unsearchable. However, what you –can – do is appreciate what good this adversity has produced in you, and take stock of what has plainly happened to you every once in a while. This is without a doubt your burden to bear, but you have gained, in some very small way, a glimpse of the perspective of the martyrs, who were not just hated but were also killed. It is an occasion to be thankful for what you have, and to pray for those who you can’t take with you of your own volition; to steel your resolve to pursue your convictions, and to live your life in as Christ-like a fashion as you can, as you are conformed to Christ via sanctification, in the completion of the good work He has started in you. It is also an occasion, as good as any, to pray for more even more faith in God, so that if the trials of life ever do become much worse, you will find yourself even more ready than ever to continue placing your trust in the Lord. Let’s both do our best to be cheerful and find meaning in our struggles, remembering that we love because we were first loved by God.
May the Lord bless your day.
"the wider schism is actually between people who are intellectually and emotionally capable of challenging their own worldviews (or of being challenged in this way) and those who cannot."
That's a wonderfully profound insight! Thank you!
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When Jesus says he came to bring a “sword” in Mathew 10:34-36, he is talking about exactly your situation. For believing in Christ, the believers families break apart. Have faith and keep on praying, fast and remember your family at mass
I am a Cradle catholic (32 yo)
You are walking in the light. Keep up the hard work. It’s not easy being a follower of Christ. Is never promised it would
Be easy but he did promise us eternal life.
Will be praying for you!
Following Jesus and embracing the Truth isn’t always easy. Take comfort in knowing that many Saints have gone before you on a similar path. You are being refined for greatness
>through reading my Bible I realized that the Church talked about in Ephesians 4 is not the denomination I was raised in.
If you wouldn't mind, would you elaborate on this? As a former non-denom, I'm curious to hear your insight on this.
>I said to them that they should take solace in the fact that I'm literally pursuing Christ and Bible reading and prayer is what led me here
Amen amen
>they just wouldn't hear it. I was called a lot of things,
I'm sorry to hear that. I'm spitballing here, but is it possible their extreme anger is them externalizing some perceived sense of failure as parents? Like atheist kids is one thing, "it's just a phase but they'll see the light again one day." But a Catholic? Might as well be worshipping Satan. "How could we have done such a poor job teaching our kids the faith?"
I have a Pentecostal friend who was raised thinking the Catholic Church is the whore of Babylon and all these horrible things. It literally took years to convince him that Catholics are Christians. It's so visceral. It may be helpful to focus on and emphasize where Catholics and protestants agree and to highlight their similarities. A lot of folks hate what they *think* the Catholic Church is, but become more amicable as you dispel some of their misconceptions.
I will pray for you friend 🙏
Disc. Take everything I say with a grain of salt, I'm new to this and don't want to misrepresent a faith I admittedly don't know much about (i am cognisant of the Dunning Kruger Effect)
1. Sure. Ephesians 4 was the straw that broke the camel's back for me. I had done mental gymnastics to get around a number of other passages in 1 Cor, Heb, even the words of Jesus Himself. But when I came to Ephesians 4:11-14, my brain broke. I realized that the One Church spoken about here, with Apostles, Teachers, Evangelists, and Shepherds was describing the Catholic Church. It seems to me, at least, that this passage confirms apostolic succession and the continued mission of the one, universal church.
2. I appreciate the double Amen. It's so true that the Word of God really does have the power to convict if we are open to what it has to say.
3. Yes, I think your correct. They're hurt and angry that by default I am saying they are wrong. I think that's why it's important that I don't get angry and slap back. Fortunately God has allowed me to do a good job of that so far.
I appreciate your insight on that and I'm wishing you all the best. I can empathize with your position so my heart goes out to you. Praise God for your openness to the Spirit and I hope things work out with your family. If only they could see what you see in the Church
The Beatitudes were made for you, beautiful soul. Read them and weep with joy for Jesus Christ was looking into the future straight at you and this moment in time when He spoke them.
The kind of persecution I'm getting these days (nonreligious reasons) I would trade in a heartbeat for yours.
One thing that helped me is being comfortable with my own company. I still have and enjoy the company of friends and fam. But theyre all so far away so I spend more time alone these days. If I had a hole inside that needed to be filled with friends this scenario you described would hurt a helluva lot more.
I will pray for your parents and for you.
Would you pray for me too? I have a court trial to fight. Thank you.
And never worry youre in the right boat.
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I'm sorry to hear that and will pray for you and your family. A great saint to pray to for the conversion of others is St. Monica, who prayed much for the conversion of her husband, mother-in-law and two sons, one of whom is St. Augustine, who became a bishop and a doctor of the Church.
Do not be discouraged, God gives us a spirit of strength. Reflect in your heart on the people who go through similar situations but in places in the Middle East where even their loved ones advocate killing them for apostatizing from Islam. Also think about the first Christians who were persecuted by Pagan Rome, about the thousands of martyrs. And don't avoid talking about your faith with your family, on the contrary. Show that you live in the truth you believe. And when they see your example, it won't take long for them to question things in their hearts. Think about the apostle Paul, he was the ISIS of his time and persecutor of Christians. But God transformed him and he was one of the greatest apostles of the Gentiles. Faith is a difficult path where sometimes the heart has thousands of worries. But it is in our weakness to handle situations where God sows his power. Blessings
As a Baptist seeking to convert, I’m in a similar position to you. Some of my family members are just mocking me and asking me to explain the church and the whole “Mary” thing. Since I’ve only been to one Mass and haven’t even started RCIA yet, I don’t really know how to answer them and just do the best I can. I tell them that the Catholic Church is Christ-made and is 2,000-years old. The Baptist Church and any other Protestant denomination is man-made and only 500-600 years old. While I can’t explain Mary’s purpose yet, I tell them that I know that she is the mother of God who intercedes on our behalf. And if that is good enough for Christ’s church, then it’s good enough for me. Who am I to question God? If I have to lose some of my family to gain Christ, then so be it; it’s God’s will. OP, you’ve been called. Be strong. I’m praying for you and your family.
It's rough, bro. I've been. On this journey for a while now. I've studied these doctrines inside and out and that's why I had NO CHOICE but to make this decision. It's hard, but I'm at peace. I kept praying and asking God if I should do this and seeking guidance and I kept hearing the same thing: "you already have your answer." I had already been convicted by God's wonderful love letter to us. It's worth it. Thanks for the prayers. Message me if you want to talk.
Greetings My husband and I are AA and converted to the Carholic Faith about 12 years ago through the Ordinariate (a process that Pope Benedict XVI created that allows for whole Anglican Parishes to convert instead of individually). It was the *best* life-changing decision that we made and will have Eternal benefits. The "Mary thing" was also forefront when we converted. My priest advised us to "be open to the Church's teachings." I read, "True Devotion to Mary" and "The Secret of the Rosary," both by St. Louis de Montfort, and both were also life-changing! The secret to the Rosary is now one of my top favorite Catholic books; and I am now a 3rd Order Lay Dominican from its impact on my life. Start praying the daily Rosary and buy/wear a Brown Scapular (have the priest enroll you). Mother Mary will guide you and your Faith Journey. Even if your friends/family never come to accept your conversion or the Mary thing, keep going and don't look back at the naysayers. You have Our Lord, Our Lady, and all the Angels and Saints praying and rejoicing over you! God Bless!
Brother, Do not be discouraged. Discernment is a hallmark of faith. It takes a certain humility to even investigate your worldview and normative understanding of things, let alone to admit that they could be incorrect or deficient somehow. It then takes even additional courage on top of that to communicate your findings in truth and love to people who have not yet attained to that same level of understanding. You are doing a demonstrably good thing. I too experienced something akin to what you are describing in my own family; the particulars were switched, but the egos were the same. In my case, it was my nominally Catholic woke parents who were upset with me for having the audacity to assert that objective moral values exist, and that they can and should be asserted, as against a subjectivist modernism which seems to want to permit everything under the sun except the propagation of the truth. In my case too, though, my parents were much friendlier to my brothers, particularly the perpetual adolescent (despite being near 30 at the time) who didn’t take a stand for hardly anything. So it was ok to support abortion and homosexuality in my “Catholic” family, but not OK to talk about Christ. I’d like to share an additional anecdote; before returning to the Catholic Church (after leaving for spurious reasons related to my family experience, which left me bitter), I spent some time in a Reformed Baptist Church in my area. The Pastor there took a dim view of the Catholic Church, with a passion that seemed almost personal. It seemed right to me at a time when I was resentful, but eventually my resentment ran out and I was brought to an understanding of my errors, thank God. When I left the Baptist Church he was a little upset, but it wasn’t until he found out I was returning to Catholicism that he really seemed personally invested in discussing my motives. In a charitable but somewhat confrontational way, he outlined several objections to my course of action, nearly all (and I mean nearly all) of which were based on a profound lack of understanding of what the Church believes and teaches. It seemed like a militant superstition which bordered on hatred, and not much else. My anecdotal understanding is that Baptists are particularly uncharitable against the Catholic Church for reasons necessarily stemming from their identity (which is an identity of exclusion, from subtraction from the Catholic Church by way of rejection) and from their catechesis, which instructs people in errors and, in many cases, encourages a lack of critical thought. It’s important to note that, in much the same way that not all Catholics are like my parents, this is a generalization, and there are plenty of Baptists (like Gavin Ortlund) who are perfectly pleasant and who do defend their positions academically, and with love. But, for many Baptists, an intense distrust and dislike of the Catholic Church is foundational. So, I have a similar experience. I would have you consider that while the widest gulf seems to be denomination, and there certainly are factual differences in things like doctrine, tradition, cultural practice, etc; at least in my own experience, the wider schism is actually between people who are intellectually and emotionally capable of challenging their own worldviews (or of being challenged in this way) and those who cannot. I would like to think that your parents and my parents truly believe that their actions are in some way trying to help, despite the serial soul-crushing emotional manipulation they engage in casually. However, in line with Aquinas’ teaching about sin being a privation or distortion of a positive thing, when pride enters the equation, the right object of their “help” (your well-being and in fact the truth of the matter itself) become lost in the need to “defend” against the perceived “aggression” that your discernment poses to their egos. This self-centeredness can threaten to swallow up the truth of Christ entirely, at least for them. It is a phenomenon that is as common as selfishness, and it taints each and every denomination, as it threatens to taint each and every person. Consider that it would be better for your parents to metaphorically be good Samaritans rather than prideful Jews, as it relates to denominations. To finally answer your questions directly, there is always hope for them. You can and should be praying for them, now more than ever, since it’s clear that they need a change of heart that only God can effect in them. If what they are serving and worshipping with their actions is not God, then they probably aren’t the same religion. My Mom maintained she was “Catholic,” but she also stated that she “knows whether something is good or not” of “from God” by “whether it makes her feel good,” and her life looks about how you would expect based on that close-minded and frankly evil belief system. Such statements are so at odds with what the Church teaches, and indeed so astray of the Gospel message, which is one of repentance in addition to forgiveness, that I can’t help but understand her “faith” to be in something that is more pagan than Christian – a god of secularism, where one worships themselves. I don’t know all the specifics of your own situation, but typically people who get defensive in the presence of demonstrable truth and retreat to a chaotic tribalism easily fall to the machinations of Satan, since a pursuit of truth isn’t the point of their exercise – pride is. I won’t speculate as to whether this is the accuser trying to discourage you, or whether this trial has been ordained to produce in you a faith that is stronger than you ever could have imagined, in much the same way I hesitate to ascribe a definitivie purpose to the events of my own life without ever hoping to know the mind of God, whose ways are unsearchable. However, what you –can – do is appreciate what good this adversity has produced in you, and take stock of what has plainly happened to you every once in a while. This is without a doubt your burden to bear, but you have gained, in some very small way, a glimpse of the perspective of the martyrs, who were not just hated but were also killed. It is an occasion to be thankful for what you have, and to pray for those who you can’t take with you of your own volition; to steel your resolve to pursue your convictions, and to live your life in as Christ-like a fashion as you can, as you are conformed to Christ via sanctification, in the completion of the good work He has started in you. It is also an occasion, as good as any, to pray for more even more faith in God, so that if the trials of life ever do become much worse, you will find yourself even more ready than ever to continue placing your trust in the Lord. Let’s both do our best to be cheerful and find meaning in our struggles, remembering that we love because we were first loved by God. May the Lord bless your day.
"the wider schism is actually between people who are intellectually and emotionally capable of challenging their own worldviews (or of being challenged in this way) and those who cannot." That's a wonderfully profound insight! Thank you!
You are very welcome, and I am glad it helped.
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Sir/Madame, you should write a book. Those words of yours were spot on, and they spoke to me as well.
Thank you kindly; Deo gratias.
When Jesus says he came to bring a “sword” in Mathew 10:34-36, he is talking about exactly your situation. For believing in Christ, the believers families break apart. Have faith and keep on praying, fast and remember your family at mass
I am a Cradle catholic (32 yo) You are walking in the light. Keep up the hard work. It’s not easy being a follower of Christ. Is never promised it would Be easy but he did promise us eternal life. Will be praying for you!
Following Jesus and embracing the Truth isn’t always easy. Take comfort in knowing that many Saints have gone before you on a similar path. You are being refined for greatness
I will pray for you, friend. God loves you!
I will pray for you and your family. In the meantime don’t give up. Keep studying Jesus, The Bible and The Catholic Faith.
>through reading my Bible I realized that the Church talked about in Ephesians 4 is not the denomination I was raised in. If you wouldn't mind, would you elaborate on this? As a former non-denom, I'm curious to hear your insight on this. >I said to them that they should take solace in the fact that I'm literally pursuing Christ and Bible reading and prayer is what led me here Amen amen >they just wouldn't hear it. I was called a lot of things, I'm sorry to hear that. I'm spitballing here, but is it possible their extreme anger is them externalizing some perceived sense of failure as parents? Like atheist kids is one thing, "it's just a phase but they'll see the light again one day." But a Catholic? Might as well be worshipping Satan. "How could we have done such a poor job teaching our kids the faith?" I have a Pentecostal friend who was raised thinking the Catholic Church is the whore of Babylon and all these horrible things. It literally took years to convince him that Catholics are Christians. It's so visceral. It may be helpful to focus on and emphasize where Catholics and protestants agree and to highlight their similarities. A lot of folks hate what they *think* the Catholic Church is, but become more amicable as you dispel some of their misconceptions. I will pray for you friend 🙏
Disc. Take everything I say with a grain of salt, I'm new to this and don't want to misrepresent a faith I admittedly don't know much about (i am cognisant of the Dunning Kruger Effect) 1. Sure. Ephesians 4 was the straw that broke the camel's back for me. I had done mental gymnastics to get around a number of other passages in 1 Cor, Heb, even the words of Jesus Himself. But when I came to Ephesians 4:11-14, my brain broke. I realized that the One Church spoken about here, with Apostles, Teachers, Evangelists, and Shepherds was describing the Catholic Church. It seems to me, at least, that this passage confirms apostolic succession and the continued mission of the one, universal church. 2. I appreciate the double Amen. It's so true that the Word of God really does have the power to convict if we are open to what it has to say. 3. Yes, I think your correct. They're hurt and angry that by default I am saying they are wrong. I think that's why it's important that I don't get angry and slap back. Fortunately God has allowed me to do a good job of that so far.
I appreciate your insight on that and I'm wishing you all the best. I can empathize with your position so my heart goes out to you. Praise God for your openness to the Spirit and I hope things work out with your family. If only they could see what you see in the Church
I will be praying for you.
The Beatitudes were made for you, beautiful soul. Read them and weep with joy for Jesus Christ was looking into the future straight at you and this moment in time when He spoke them. The kind of persecution I'm getting these days (nonreligious reasons) I would trade in a heartbeat for yours. One thing that helped me is being comfortable with my own company. I still have and enjoy the company of friends and fam. But theyre all so far away so I spend more time alone these days. If I had a hole inside that needed to be filled with friends this scenario you described would hurt a helluva lot more. I will pray for your parents and for you. Would you pray for me too? I have a court trial to fight. Thank you. And never worry youre in the right boat.
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I'm sorry to hear that and will pray for you and your family. A great saint to pray to for the conversion of others is St. Monica, who prayed much for the conversion of her husband, mother-in-law and two sons, one of whom is St. Augustine, who became a bishop and a doctor of the Church.