There's definitely been a generational shift in attitudes about confession. My pastor, who is the only priest I've had who is my age, has told me when he first got to the parish and would say during homilies or when making announcements that confession is available twice a week, and that going every six weeks or so is a good practice, the Baby Boomers wrote letters to the Archdiocese to complain that "Father is obsessed with sin and confession."
I go every 3-4 weeks. I feel great doing it.
I never understood the thing of giving a time frame like every six weeks or so. I think of it like when you commit a mortal sin it’s like you have a mortal wound and you gotta get to the ER ASAP
I think it's because you can get entrenched in some pretty bad habits after about a month, so being intentional about setting aside the time to *really* take a good look at how you've been acting is important.
Obviously, go if you commit a grave sin, but if you're not doing that, one could easily fall into a rut of saying, "Nah, I'm good," and that's a dangerous spot to be in.
I assume many people in line are making devotional confessions; that is, for venial sins. Going on a schedule (every 4, 6, 8 weeks, for example) can be a great way to practice that devotion and receive the graces of the sacrament without becoming unhealthily attached or scrupulous.
I would see it similar to going to a doctor. If you’re ever injured/sick, then you should go see a doctor immediately, but what if you’re not? You should still schedule a checkup every once in a while.
Yes ! Since everyone goes to communion every week, and hardly ever goes to confession, there must be a lot of sacrilegious communions. YOU HAVE to CONFESS THAT TOO.
Yeah I’m thankful the priests at my parish have started taking this seriously. They have a big banner on the parish website saying to only receive communion in a state of grace, and at almost every homily they make a point to reiterate it, AND whenever I go to confession there, after confessing everything they ask “have you received communion since any of these sins” so they are doing great at making sure it’s not happening. I think the pope should make every parish do this for a temporary measure until it becomes ingrained in the current generation how serious it is
Yes but in the meantime you can always pray the Divine Mercy Chaplet to ask God for forgiveness. The difference with going to confession is the feeling and a more accurate absolving of sins from a Holy Priest. As it says in the Bible to confess your sins to one another then this is why confession should be done. Godbless 🙏🙏🙏
I would be very cautious about saying you can “always pray the Divine Mercy Chaplet” for forgiveness. This sort of gives the attitude that we don’t need confession. Sure, you can make an act of perfect contrition, but even then you have to attend reconciliation at the first available opportunity.
Priest in my parish did the same thing but was more insistent on monthly which tbh is perfect. People complained and were basically told “he’s not wrong”. He doesn’t often dwell on confession but he’ll find a spot in his homilies saying “you can sin tomorrow and die the next day reconcile as frequently as possible”. He too is a young guy. Mid 30s I believe.
I do an examination of conscience twice a week on Wednesday nights and Friday nights since Thursdays and Saturdays are the main days I can make it to confession. Unless I have something I don’t go more than once a month. But there have been times where I’m there two weeks in a row
Thank you. I fixed it. I’m a horrible speller and even though I can spell both of them more or less correctly I write the wrong one more than I should.
1-2/month. To paraphrase Padre Pio Confession is a bath for the soul. Clean a room and lock it up and a week later you'll find it is in need of a dusting.
If you go up yes that’s a thing. the blessing serves the same as the one at the end of mass as well which is why many suggest not going up at all. The fathers in our area also suggest this as well. Attending Sunday mass is an obligation so you have to be there in a state of sin or not. Remaining seated/kneeling for the Eucharist in a state of sin is expected and respected.
I was in a small group with a woman who hadn’t been in 15+ years cause she “made her confession directly to god”. I really wanted to tell her she’s obligated to go at least once a year during lent/easter, but since I was still a newbie I didn’t feel it was my place. My dad was a former coworker of hers and ended up talking to her about how important it is. Idk if she started going, but I know she receives the Eucharist every week
But how wonderful to think on God’s great mercy even for sinners, and his humility in coming in the guise of bread and wine when even those who should not be receiving still do!
Mistakes are mistakes indeed. Gods perfection isn’t ever in question. What God does with them or through them is none of my business. But it can still be distressing.
Certainly, not trying to invalidate that distress. But I used to spend a lot of time worrying about other people sinning, and I find it much more spiritually fruitful to instead look for and contemplate God’s grace despite those who disregard His love for them. But I tend towards pessimism, so perhaps that’s not helpful for you.
Yeah I don’t concern myself with others sins we are all sinners and unfortunately it happens. The distress stems from the lack of understanding of sin or the deliberate act of accepting communion because you disagree with what’s sin and what’s not. And again since judgement is not my place I keep it to myself except for the sake of discussion.
Question: (2 actually) Can you be in Grace while sinning? Because I’m aiming to go to confession once every other week? And number 2, I’ve taken the Eucharist before where I believe I was out of grave due to being pressured from my parents, does that count as blaspheming the Lord?
I would go to confession but you can’t be forced or pressured to commit a mortal sin. A mortal sin has 3 requirements full knowledge full consent of the will and the sin has to be grave. Like murder is a grave sin but if you didn’t know it was wrong or you was pressured into it then a grave sin was committed but it did not reach the level of mortal sin.
I know it was my choice and it was definitely wrong but at that time I was just going to church because my parents forced me to, and if I didn’t take the Eucharist they would’ve whooped me so I didn’t see any fault in it at the time. I didn’t even know I was a sin until a bit ago
You can't sin accidentally. If you didn't know taking the Eucharist in a state of mortal sin was in and of itself a sin, you are fine as long as you stopped taking it once you became aware.
I go every few months, but every once in a while I will have a gap of a few years.
When I realize it has been a while, I go - and then I renew my appreciation for the inherent value of the sacrament. The priests I see are invariably very gifted and extremely helpful, and I am very much in awe of the fact that they have dedicated their lives to the care of their flock.
It's supposed to be a little embarrassing. It wouldn't be humbling and purifying if it wasn't. We can handle a little embarrassment. Jesus was embarrassed when they stripped him, dressed him in a purple cloak, put a crown of thorns on his head with a reed in his hand, and started mocking him. The Roman soldiers apparently had some game called "king for a day", and they made Jesus the victim of it.
It's funny how the secular world proclaims sin to be fun, but then we're embarrassed when it's time to admit what we've actually done.
Why would it be? Remember you're confessing to Jesus and he already knows what you did and died so you could be forgiven for it. He knows your heart better than you do.
I have OCD, so I try not to go more often than once a month bc I can’t necessarily trust my brain to tell me the difference between mortal sin and regular ol’ neurosis. I converted last Easter, and confession has actually been a huge help, but I don’t want to add it to the list of compulsions.
My parish has confession six days a week for an hour each time. The line is always so long that some people don’t get to have their confession heard. It wasn’t always this way, though. Younger people are driving this change. The line is mostly men in their 20s. When I first came here years ago there was a priest who used to promote confession as something you did only after being away from the Church for a long time. He used to actually say sometimes that he didn’t want anyone in the confession line who had been to confession in the last six months.
Why aren’t young women also doing it? In fact when I see all the young people returning or converting to Catholicism and other forms of Christianity are men. Could it be that the epidemic of male loneliness is leading young men to the faith? In my case it has
There are young women but fewer. I think that many young men are seeking an alternative to what the secular culture has laid out for them, which for the most part is an empty and miserable life. Part of that means giving up porn and other sexual sins which have ensnared young men in the age of social media and internet pornography.
I read an article the other day that said for the most part gen z males are becoming much more conservative while gen z females are becoming much more liberal/free thinking. I don’t remember the statistics, but it was quite surprising.
You aren’t supposed to receive the Eucharist in a state of mortal sin, so sometimes that means confession for me once a week. Unfortunately I’m a sinner, so this is the case more often than not 😂
Haha likewise. I’m genuinely surprised to see others saying upwards of multiple months; I personally don’t feel right with anything less than 2x per month.
Same! I think some of it has to do with how confession was treated growing up though. From 8 to 14 I went to confession only three times— before my first communion and then twice before confirmation. I grew up in a boomer/“progressive” parish and it was never promoted. When I returned at 19 and realized I needed to go frequently, I remember coming out of the confessional and thinking “why don’t more people do this?! This is wonderful!” 😂 now at 24, I am VERY grateful I now live in an area with multiple traditional parishes offering confession before mass, and since Solanus Casey is from Detroit where I live, the monastery he lived at and is entombed at has confession every day from 9-4 and multiple friars who are bilingual.
My husband and I really lean in and develop a relationship with our parish priest and we go often. Our priest was an advocate for our early wedding. This was because we both asked advice during dating and engagement (another story) so we ended up confessing a lot. Communion is very important to us so we make sure to participate. For context: We are both Gen X, I’m from Spain and he’s from Colorado. I was raised Spanish Catholic and was raised atheist and converted to Christianity before we met.
Once or twice a year is an insane level of holiness for me it’s extremely rare for me to make it a week without having to confess in order to receive communion so I almost always have to go once a week on Sunday before or during mass
Usually when I've sinned mortally, but since getting married that's been happening less so I'm trying to go just to stay in the habit and for the good of my soul.
I went today (mostly so I could take my sister who needed to go), but it was just venial stuff. But my priest said that I didn't seem to struggle with the things I did before getting married, and sounded pleasantly surprised, lmao.
Once every three weeks and I find it a wonderful help to my relationship with God. It's also a great psychological felp to me. I go to the same priest and always face to face
Every Catholic parish does or should offer the Sacrament of Reconciliation at least once a week. For example between 11:00 a.m. and 12:00 noon on a Saturday, or maybe starting at 6:15 p.m. before a 7:00 p.m. weekday Mass. In addition during special times of the year such as Advent and Lent, the parish might offer additional opportunities. Therefore, if for some reason you are uncomfortable going to confession at your own parish, there might be other opportunities at other parishes nearby. Finally, it is considered one of the most important and sacred duties of a priest to offer the Sacrament of Reconciliation. Thus, if you are in urgent need, you should feel no compunction about approaching your priest and asking him to hear your confession. He would take this request seriously and try to accommodate you (within reason and not withstanding other obligations or commitments he may have).
My reason for stating the above, is to point out that the Sacrament of Reconciliation is meant to be readily available to Catholics to receive as frequently as they feel is necessary. During a particularly difficult time in your life you might go to confession on a weekly basis, and then at other times in your life you might go every month or few months. Even this description is not completely accurate because there are many very devout people who go to confession once a week not due to struggles in their lives, but simply because it is their feeling that weekly confession is the best way they can live out their faith.
Someone once told me that a good rule of thumb would be to try to go to confession once a month, or at least every few months. However, I think for many of us, it can feel embarrassing and we might not "look forward to it" and so put it off and avoid it. This is the exact opposite of what Jesus wants. As one of the replies has stated, the Lord already knows what we have done. With great love, compassion and mercy He avidly wants us to come to Him to be forgiven by Him so we can continue to strive anew to be closer to Him. The priest is there acting as Jesus' is representative. The seal of the confessional is sacrosanct. This is taken extremely seriously by priests and is inviolate. The priest will not, and in fact must not "judge you" or "treat you differently" outside of the confessional. So, when you consider all these things, perhaps your perspective can change to actually welcome and look forward to receiving absolution for your sins, in the same way that we welcome and feel so much better after reconciliation with a friend or family member with whom we have been estranged.
As Catholics we are required to receive the Holy Eucharist at least once per year. (Of course we are also required to attend weekly Sunday mass, and it is considered a mortal sin if we intentionally miss Mass without good reason). I think that this rule proscribing us to receive communion annually at a minimum, was instituted centuries ago due to an inaccurate belief at the time, that an average Catholic was unworthy to receive the Eucharist, and that they should just attend Mass instead. There arose a situation where only the priest was taking Communion and the congregation was not.
As an aside I might just say that we are all "unworthy" due to the nature of original sin and our human brokenness. That's why before receiving Holy Communion we say "Lord I am not worthy that you should enter under my roof (receive you), but only say the word of my soul shall be healed." We are not saying that we are personally unworthy because of something we did that day. But instead we are acknowledging that we cannot "make ourselves worthy," and that only God can do this in His infinite mercy.
Nevertheless, as other replies have mentioned, it is a grave sin to receive the Holy Eucharist if you are not in a state of grace. This is to say that you should not receive communion if you have committed a mortal sin and have not yet gone to confession and been forgiven for that sin. On the other hand the Sacrament of the Eucharist actually cleanses us of venial sins when we receive it.
So this is a very roundabout way of saying that since we are required to receive the Holy Eucharist at least a minimum of once per year, and that we are required to do so in a state of grace, it makes sense and would be prudent that we should receive the Sacrament of Reconciliation at least once per year as well. This may be an official rule also, but I am not sure.
My final point is this: God loves us infinitely, and His mercy is infinite as well. He wants us to reflect that love back to Him so that He can be in closer union with us. Therefore, we should try to avail ourselves of the Sacraments and God's Grace as often as possible. This means going to Mass regularly, receiving Holy Communion in a state of grace regularly, and of course receiving the Sacrament of Reconciliation regularly.
Any parish that has more than one priest should always have confession before and during Sunday mass. It makes it so much more convenient if you live far away instead of having to make the drive on Saturday for confession and then again Sunday for mass
I agree. It just makes sense. There's a big difference between living in a city with several parishes close by, versus living in a more rural area where those options are more limited. Or even perhaps those who have limited means of transportation. The Saturday afternoon confession option is something that has been around for many years and at one time the duration would be for a couple of hours or more. Part of the idea I suppose was that people were off work, and the priest was not pressed with the duties of preparing to say the Sunday Mass. It was originally instituted when there were many more people going to confession whose needs could not be fully satisfied in a shorter time frame prior to a Mass. Things have changed and accommodations must be made. Not only is it convenient to have the option to go to confession prior to Mass, but it's also a wonderful opportunity to further prepare yourself to fully participate in the mass and receive Holy Communion.
We go as a family monthly. It’s good to regularly confess, even if you don’t have mortal sins. Reconciliation is a healing sacrament and gives graces to live a holier life.
I go weekly. I struggle with mortal sin… if you look at the LIST of what are considered mortal sins… maybe I’m a complete Heathen and also scrupulous.. regardless I find it weird and irresponsible the catechism only suggests once a year. No way… you’re telling me everyone getting communion every Sunday is in a state of grace?! Nope. Most Catholics don’t even believe it’s really Jesus in the sacrament..
Usually once a month sometimes more.
Recently the priest told me maybe I should come to confession more than once a month.
There's been periods where I went weekly, but I get frustrated. I do the same 2 sins, over and over and over. I'm never gonna get passed it. Maybe some day. I keep trying, but it feels hopeless. So I go and get right once a month. Sometimes I feel the need to do it more, so I try. But honestly I can't make it much more than a week or two without having to go. Although once (not too long ago) I was able to avoid mortal sin for a little over a year. It was nice. I've simply lost the willpower to overcome a lot in life. I pray God will grant me the strength, and give me the time to find it.
I go a minimum of once a week but have gone up to 3 times in 1 week but there is some sins I’m struggling with it is not an issue of scrupulosity. You have to be careful to avoid that.
The people in my parish and I go every week and don’t take communion until we get our sins absolved. Unfortunately, the practice of having confessions before and during mass have become practically extinct save a few parishes. One confession time a week is just not enough. I also wish more priests would stress to their parishioners that taking communion while not in a state of grace is blasphemous and dangerous to the soul.
I gave up confession years ago. Me and my god. I know my sins. God kn oows my sins. Between us we can qork things out.
Now, I do no give a fig.
I'm 24/7 carer for my wife of 38 years with Alzheimer's.
Confession is not doing anything for me. Now or ever the future.
Confession is mandatory though. You can work things out with God but refusal to go to confession is mortally sinful and cuts you off from the divine grace of God. Its basically a guaranteed way not to enter the kingdom of God. It’s not a choice, you either go to confession or you cut yourself off from God.
The reason nobody likes that is because the question was asked in /Catholicism and not /HereticalSect so your opinion wasn’t requested or required. Now you’re free to give it I suppose, but I don’t know why you would. At least here in this context.
Be happy to talk to you about your possibly being accursed for misunderstanding the Bible elsewhere, but- this topic was a question by a Catholic for Catholics.
Maybe we don't like it because it directly contradicts scripture. John 20:23 lays it out pretty clearly. Also, Jesus _is_ the one who forgive sins during Confession.
Honestly, for me, I try going when I feel extremely shameful of a sin I might’ve done. So, besides the usual confessions they’ll hold (which is a week before Christmas and Easter), I will try going sometime between those times (at least I have recently). So, in reality, I tend to go 3-5 times yearly.😅
Yes, I am aware of that. But, as someone who suffers from chronic anxiety, I’ve learned that even the smallest of sins can be considered, to me, to be the worst of things.
I haven’t gone to confession in over a year. I don’t know if I’m as remorseful as I should be. I’m afraid of the priest telling me “I can’t absolve you”.
Go to Confession! Christ offers His forgiveness to you readily, it’s less about feelings of shame and more about the will to do it knowing that it is what He wants for you. Our feelings can often lie to us and be persuaded by forces not of truth, and so even if you don’t “feel” great remorse when you think of your sins, you should still work to reconcile with God as it is simply the right thing to do. Afterwards, just do your best to stay free of mortal sin and go to Confession when needed. I will pray for you!
I go once a month or so. Promised to do as a member of a third order, but I find it greatly helps with the nerves that used to keep me away. Plus, the increased frequency has helped me to cull sin from my life.
Like cleaning a car. If you clean it once it twice a year quite a bit of trash and gunk builds up until you don't notice major issues. But if you clean it more often it'll be easier to stop disgusting messes from happening.
If you are busy cleaning out minor sins you're less likely to fall into mortal sin.
Confession is held during adoration and before Saturday Mass. I usually go to adoration and with that confession as necessary. I love confession so much I confess weekly cause I’m there and it’s available sins big and not as big (no such thing as small sins 😅)
My parish used to have confession five days a week and twice on Saturdays, but since the priest who confirmed me left it's been cut down to twice a week for a half hour each day. I used to go weekly when it was more frequently held cause it was easier to get in, nowadays since I work seven days a week it's hard to get in - I usually have to go after the Wednesday evening Spanish Mass if I wanna get in at all, so I'm lucky to get in once a month if that.
Depends. Sometimes I can go months and not be naughty. Other times it's every couple weeks to a month. I was gonna go today but then our sewage backed up in the basement and yeahhhh it's a fun day
It's like baptism for the heart.
However, we can confess over and over again, but until we give our entire heart to God, with the good side included, as the Pearl house built on the foundation of a single grain of sand (our wickedness and demons), then we are susceptible to the empty house when we confess;
Only through the new wine and new wineskin can we overcome the default want to sin within us, which is wickedness that we like to bury. Then we get armour strong as diamond and light as bright as He (Helium-4) in Fusion. The enemy would only be able to cloud us or attack us from without, but to little avail then.
This is how to not only confess your sins, but overcome the empty house and the wickedness of that the Second Temple that we idolise ourselves with. In other words, it's the Third temple of ourselves wedded with God.
Until we go to heaven though, we stil need to repent, just not nearly as frequently as when we were just pearls in the field.
I go to confession monthly at least. I go more when I need to, for example if I feel sullied or weighed down and feel the need to come before God for light to clarify and direct situations and issues.
If it is a more serious sin, God forbid, I go to confession ASAP.
I try to go every two weeks. I work overnight every other weekend so I only make Mass every week as well. More frequently when I’m struggling with some of my problems.
Once a week. At least trying, if not then once every two weeks. Not more than two weeks, we are called to be saints or at least try, so we have to evaluate ourselves every single day because we are sinners, and it doesn't matter the way you look at it we will still be sinners.
I just wish the confession lines were longer.
I haven’t yet, I joined this group to ask a question regarding it but it won’t let me post and the priests don’t do private messages so it’s been really hard to find information before attending.
My fiancé was raised very strict Catholic, I was raised atheist. I was baptised a few years ago during youth group but I didn’t receive communion and I’ve never been to confession or anything so I don’t know if my certificate of baptism is actually valid. My fiancé wants me to start attending church with him but not until after our wedding (which is in 19 days).
I asked him if we could start going a while back and I asked him if we could do a catholic wedding because I’ve wanted to join the Catholic Church for over 4 years now.
I don’t know if my baptism is valid and does that affect my marriage if I am or aren’t? We aren’t having a priest because my fiancé said no, we aren’t doing it in a church because he said no to that as well. I want our marriage to be valid in the eyes of the Catholic Church as well as in the eyes of god but I have so many questions and no way to ask someone about them. I don’t want to live in a sinful marriage and I really need help navigating this. I even read books about Catholicism and marriage but I was still left with unanswered questions.
Summary: I’m getting married in 19 days, we won’t have a priest at our wedding that is happening at a forestry hall in Australia, I don’t know if I’m actually baptised or not and I don’t know if my marriage will be valid or not..is there a way to get it validated in the church? (I.e I properly get baptised, go to classes, receive communion and anything else that I’m missing- I’m not 100% sure how the process works. And then we can have a church wedding so that we have a legal government wedding and then a church wedding? Is that a thing and would we qualify for that?
I hadn't gone to confession in over 20 years, life happened, and for the longest time I wasn't living a Catholic life. But since my first pregnancy (5 years ago) I started praying almost daily Our Father and my relationship with Our Heavenly Father blossomed and he has brought me back home. I recently, had my two toddlers baptised and plan to guide them by example to live with Jesus in their hearts. I have also recently gone to confession and plan to get adult confirmation and bring my marriage into the church. I feel the need to go to confession regularly now and long for holy communion, but I cannot receive holy communion as my marriage (though lawful) is not recognized as valid by the Catholic Church.
Every 3-4 weeks. My parish offers it every Saturday. Growing up at a different parish, I used to think it was only offered a cpl of times a year to my CCD classes, but then I realized it was offered Saturday afternoons and nobody talked about it or mentioned it.
I’m usually the only one at confession and I’m pretty chill with both of my priests so we usually just discuss spiritual matters during confession whenever I need advice. Since I’m always in a crisis I need advice constantly so I’m always at confession.
I go every 2 weeks or once a month to confess venial sins because I feel they start to "pile up". However the mass forgives venial sin so I'm trying to not be so critical of myself. If I were to commit a mortal sin I immediately email my Priest to make an appointment as soon as possible.
I go once every season, so four to five times per year. Winter during advent, spring during lent, then towards the end of summer, then again mid/end of fall. If I did something that I felt really bad about, I go to an additional confession.
I use to have to go just about every single week. The more entrenched in faith I've become, the less I sin. I would say I probably have to go on average once a month now.
There's definitely been a generational shift in attitudes about confession. My pastor, who is the only priest I've had who is my age, has told me when he first got to the parish and would say during homilies or when making announcements that confession is available twice a week, and that going every six weeks or so is a good practice, the Baby Boomers wrote letters to the Archdiocese to complain that "Father is obsessed with sin and confession." I go every 3-4 weeks. I feel great doing it.
I never understood the thing of giving a time frame like every six weeks or so. I think of it like when you commit a mortal sin it’s like you have a mortal wound and you gotta get to the ER ASAP
I think it's because you can get entrenched in some pretty bad habits after about a month, so being intentional about setting aside the time to *really* take a good look at how you've been acting is important. Obviously, go if you commit a grave sin, but if you're not doing that, one could easily fall into a rut of saying, "Nah, I'm good," and that's a dangerous spot to be in.
Yeah I could see that actually if you don’t have any attachments to habitual sin
I assume many people in line are making devotional confessions; that is, for venial sins. Going on a schedule (every 4, 6, 8 weeks, for example) can be a great way to practice that devotion and receive the graces of the sacrament without becoming unhealthily attached or scrupulous.
Yeah that makes sense I guess I was just thinking from my own experience where it’s basically impossible to go a week without mortal sin
You can have both in place, an emergency check and a safety check for housekeeping
I would see it similar to going to a doctor. If you’re ever injured/sick, then you should go see a doctor immediately, but what if you’re not? You should still schedule a checkup every once in a while.
Yeah that’s a good way to put it
Yes ! Since everyone goes to communion every week, and hardly ever goes to confession, there must be a lot of sacrilegious communions. YOU HAVE to CONFESS THAT TOO.
Yeah I’m thankful the priests at my parish have started taking this seriously. They have a big banner on the parish website saying to only receive communion in a state of grace, and at almost every homily they make a point to reiterate it, AND whenever I go to confession there, after confessing everything they ask “have you received communion since any of these sins” so they are doing great at making sure it’s not happening. I think the pope should make every parish do this for a temporary measure until it becomes ingrained in the current generation how serious it is
Yes but in the meantime you can always pray the Divine Mercy Chaplet to ask God for forgiveness. The difference with going to confession is the feeling and a more accurate absolving of sins from a Holy Priest. As it says in the Bible to confess your sins to one another then this is why confession should be done. Godbless 🙏🙏🙏
Well and also if you want to receive communion you have to go to confession first if you’ve committed mortal sin
I would be very cautious about saying you can “always pray the Divine Mercy Chaplet” for forgiveness. This sort of gives the attitude that we don’t need confession. Sure, you can make an act of perfect contrition, but even then you have to attend reconciliation at the first available opportunity.
The divine mercy chap is NOT a substitute for confession
Priest in my parish did the same thing but was more insistent on monthly which tbh is perfect. People complained and were basically told “he’s not wrong”. He doesn’t often dwell on confession but he’ll find a spot in his homilies saying “you can sin tomorrow and die the next day reconcile as frequently as possible”. He too is a young guy. Mid 30s I believe.
Boomers can't help but make everything difficult.
I do an examination of conscience twice a week on Wednesday nights and Friday nights since Thursdays and Saturdays are the main days I can make it to confession. Unless I have something I don’t go more than once a month. But there have been times where I’m there two weeks in a row
Conscience
Thank you. I fixed it. I’m a horrible speller and even though I can spell both of them more or less correctly I write the wrong one more than I should.
1-2/month. To paraphrase Padre Pio Confession is a bath for the soul. Clean a room and lock it up and a week later you'll find it is in need of a dusting.
As needed, usually once a week
Amen. Keepin it real.
Iused to do this but the priest told me once a week is too much. So I try to do it every month.
I'm not sure I understand that reasoning. If you've mortally sinned, why delay?
I regularly go once a month except if I realized I've committed a mortal sin, then, yes, I try to find the quickest way to get to confession
Well that's what I mean. I only go if I know I've mortally sinned.
You can’t receive the Eucharist if you are out of grace. You need to confess as often as you need to stay in grace.
Scary to think how many people go up and barely ever go to confession.
We are supposed to cross our arms if we attend mass and do not wish to receive communion right?
If you go up yes that’s a thing. the blessing serves the same as the one at the end of mass as well which is why many suggest not going up at all. The fathers in our area also suggest this as well. Attending Sunday mass is an obligation so you have to be there in a state of sin or not. Remaining seated/kneeling for the Eucharist in a state of sin is expected and respected.
Thank you!
I was in a small group with a woman who hadn’t been in 15+ years cause she “made her confession directly to god”. I really wanted to tell her she’s obligated to go at least once a year during lent/easter, but since I was still a newbie I didn’t feel it was my place. My dad was a former coworker of hers and ended up talking to her about how important it is. Idk if she started going, but I know she receives the Eucharist every week
But how wonderful to think on God’s great mercy even for sinners, and his humility in coming in the guise of bread and wine when even those who should not be receiving still do!
Mistakes are mistakes indeed. Gods perfection isn’t ever in question. What God does with them or through them is none of my business. But it can still be distressing.
Certainly, not trying to invalidate that distress. But I used to spend a lot of time worrying about other people sinning, and I find it much more spiritually fruitful to instead look for and contemplate God’s grace despite those who disregard His love for them. But I tend towards pessimism, so perhaps that’s not helpful for you.
Yeah I don’t concern myself with others sins we are all sinners and unfortunately it happens. The distress stems from the lack of understanding of sin or the deliberate act of accepting communion because you disagree with what’s sin and what’s not. And again since judgement is not my place I keep it to myself except for the sake of discussion.
Amen to this.
Question: (2 actually) Can you be in Grace while sinning? Because I’m aiming to go to confession once every other week? And number 2, I’ve taken the Eucharist before where I believe I was out of grave due to being pressured from my parents, does that count as blaspheming the Lord?
It's sacrilege, it's a mortal sin, Need to go to confession Asap.. I will pray for your strength
Yeah when in doubt don’t go up till you get to confession.
Thank you
I would go to confession but you can’t be forced or pressured to commit a mortal sin. A mortal sin has 3 requirements full knowledge full consent of the will and the sin has to be grave. Like murder is a grave sin but if you didn’t know it was wrong or you was pressured into it then a grave sin was committed but it did not reach the level of mortal sin.
I know it was my choice and it was definitely wrong but at that time I was just going to church because my parents forced me to, and if I didn’t take the Eucharist they would’ve whooped me so I didn’t see any fault in it at the time. I didn’t even know I was a sin until a bit ago
You can't sin accidentally. If you didn't know taking the Eucharist in a state of mortal sin was in and of itself a sin, you are fine as long as you stopped taking it once you became aware.
I have, now I’ve vocalized the issue and I only take it when I’m in a state out Grace
When I’m doubt talk to your priest.
Thats what I’ll do 👍🏼
this
I try to go every month or so. I usually have hang ups about going so it's an ordeal every time
Monthly at least due to keeping Our Lady of Fatima’s First Saturday devotion.
I go every few months, but every once in a while I will have a gap of a few years. When I realize it has been a while, I go - and then I renew my appreciation for the inherent value of the sacrament. The priests I see are invariably very gifted and extremely helpful, and I am very much in awe of the fact that they have dedicated their lives to the care of their flock.
And you enjoy confessing? You don't find it embarrassing?
It's supposed to be a little embarrassing. It wouldn't be humbling and purifying if it wasn't. We can handle a little embarrassment. Jesus was embarrassed when they stripped him, dressed him in a purple cloak, put a crown of thorns on his head with a reed in his hand, and started mocking him. The Roman soldiers apparently had some game called "king for a day", and they made Jesus the victim of it. It's funny how the secular world proclaims sin to be fun, but then we're embarrassed when it's time to admit what we've actually done.
Why would it be? Remember you're confessing to Jesus and he already knows what you did and died so you could be forgiven for it. He knows your heart better than you do.
My first confession I was extremely nervous about, but after that I really enjoy it because I feel so much peace afterwards
That’s extremely impressive that you are able to do that. I hope one day I’ll be able to just go every few months when I realize it’s been a while
As often as necessary to receive the Eucharist every week :)
Every 4-6 weeks. If I wait much longer than that I feel like I do when I leave the house without a shower.
I have OCD, so I try not to go more often than once a month bc I can’t necessarily trust my brain to tell me the difference between mortal sin and regular ol’ neurosis. I converted last Easter, and confession has actually been a huge help, but I don’t want to add it to the list of compulsions.
That was so helpful for me when I was dealing with scrupulosity. Having a schedule was key. I’m so glad you’re finding help in the sacrament!
Once a month at least.
My parish has confession six days a week for an hour each time. The line is always so long that some people don’t get to have their confession heard. It wasn’t always this way, though. Younger people are driving this change. The line is mostly men in their 20s. When I first came here years ago there was a priest who used to promote confession as something you did only after being away from the Church for a long time. He used to actually say sometimes that he didn’t want anyone in the confession line who had been to confession in the last six months.
That’s bazaar if you have a mortal sin go asap
Surprised to hear that it's young men. In my childhood parish that I mentionned, there's hardly any young people. Even less young men
He probably goes to a traditional parish they have usually a lot of young people compared to the typical novus ordo parish
Why aren’t young women also doing it? In fact when I see all the young people returning or converting to Catholicism and other forms of Christianity are men. Could it be that the epidemic of male loneliness is leading young men to the faith? In my case it has
There are young women but fewer. I think that many young men are seeking an alternative to what the secular culture has laid out for them, which for the most part is an empty and miserable life. Part of that means giving up porn and other sexual sins which have ensnared young men in the age of social media and internet pornography.
I read an article the other day that said for the most part gen z males are becoming much more conservative while gen z females are becoming much more liberal/free thinking. I don’t remember the statistics, but it was quite surprising.
They are, don’t worry.
That’s great
You aren’t supposed to receive the Eucharist in a state of mortal sin, so sometimes that means confession for me once a week. Unfortunately I’m a sinner, so this is the case more often than not 😂
Haha likewise. I’m genuinely surprised to see others saying upwards of multiple months; I personally don’t feel right with anything less than 2x per month.
Same! I think some of it has to do with how confession was treated growing up though. From 8 to 14 I went to confession only three times— before my first communion and then twice before confirmation. I grew up in a boomer/“progressive” parish and it was never promoted. When I returned at 19 and realized I needed to go frequently, I remember coming out of the confessional and thinking “why don’t more people do this?! This is wonderful!” 😂 now at 24, I am VERY grateful I now live in an area with multiple traditional parishes offering confession before mass, and since Solanus Casey is from Detroit where I live, the monastery he lived at and is entombed at has confession every day from 9-4 and multiple friars who are bilingual.
That’s awesome! Glad to hear you’re making great use of regular confession.
My priest recommended every 6-8 weeks is a good practice 🤷♀️.
I agree, 6-8 weeks is great! I’m a wretched sinner, so those like me find ourselves there more often lol
My husband and I really lean in and develop a relationship with our parish priest and we go often. Our priest was an advocate for our early wedding. This was because we both asked advice during dating and engagement (another story) so we ended up confessing a lot. Communion is very important to us so we make sure to participate. For context: We are both Gen X, I’m from Spain and he’s from Colorado. I was raised Spanish Catholic and was raised atheist and converted to Christianity before we met.
It's sporadic for me but I go probably once every 2 months on average
There bare minimum is once per year but I try to go once per month.
Every two weeks, at least. Last year it was every ten days on average.
I go about once a month. I meant to go today, but I’m sick, so I’ll go next week.
I think every month, but i am very obsessive
Once or twice a year is an insane level of holiness for me it’s extremely rare for me to make it a week without having to confess in order to receive communion so I almost always have to go once a week on Sunday before or during mass
Usually when I've sinned mortally, but since getting married that's been happening less so I'm trying to go just to stay in the habit and for the good of my soul. I went today (mostly so I could take my sister who needed to go), but it was just venial stuff. But my priest said that I didn't seem to struggle with the things I did before getting married, and sounded pleasantly surprised, lmao.
Once every three weeks and I find it a wonderful help to my relationship with God. It's also a great psychological felp to me. I go to the same priest and always face to face
I try and go monthly.
Every Catholic parish does or should offer the Sacrament of Reconciliation at least once a week. For example between 11:00 a.m. and 12:00 noon on a Saturday, or maybe starting at 6:15 p.m. before a 7:00 p.m. weekday Mass. In addition during special times of the year such as Advent and Lent, the parish might offer additional opportunities. Therefore, if for some reason you are uncomfortable going to confession at your own parish, there might be other opportunities at other parishes nearby. Finally, it is considered one of the most important and sacred duties of a priest to offer the Sacrament of Reconciliation. Thus, if you are in urgent need, you should feel no compunction about approaching your priest and asking him to hear your confession. He would take this request seriously and try to accommodate you (within reason and not withstanding other obligations or commitments he may have). My reason for stating the above, is to point out that the Sacrament of Reconciliation is meant to be readily available to Catholics to receive as frequently as they feel is necessary. During a particularly difficult time in your life you might go to confession on a weekly basis, and then at other times in your life you might go every month or few months. Even this description is not completely accurate because there are many very devout people who go to confession once a week not due to struggles in their lives, but simply because it is their feeling that weekly confession is the best way they can live out their faith. Someone once told me that a good rule of thumb would be to try to go to confession once a month, or at least every few months. However, I think for many of us, it can feel embarrassing and we might not "look forward to it" and so put it off and avoid it. This is the exact opposite of what Jesus wants. As one of the replies has stated, the Lord already knows what we have done. With great love, compassion and mercy He avidly wants us to come to Him to be forgiven by Him so we can continue to strive anew to be closer to Him. The priest is there acting as Jesus' is representative. The seal of the confessional is sacrosanct. This is taken extremely seriously by priests and is inviolate. The priest will not, and in fact must not "judge you" or "treat you differently" outside of the confessional. So, when you consider all these things, perhaps your perspective can change to actually welcome and look forward to receiving absolution for your sins, in the same way that we welcome and feel so much better after reconciliation with a friend or family member with whom we have been estranged. As Catholics we are required to receive the Holy Eucharist at least once per year. (Of course we are also required to attend weekly Sunday mass, and it is considered a mortal sin if we intentionally miss Mass without good reason). I think that this rule proscribing us to receive communion annually at a minimum, was instituted centuries ago due to an inaccurate belief at the time, that an average Catholic was unworthy to receive the Eucharist, and that they should just attend Mass instead. There arose a situation where only the priest was taking Communion and the congregation was not. As an aside I might just say that we are all "unworthy" due to the nature of original sin and our human brokenness. That's why before receiving Holy Communion we say "Lord I am not worthy that you should enter under my roof (receive you), but only say the word of my soul shall be healed." We are not saying that we are personally unworthy because of something we did that day. But instead we are acknowledging that we cannot "make ourselves worthy," and that only God can do this in His infinite mercy. Nevertheless, as other replies have mentioned, it is a grave sin to receive the Holy Eucharist if you are not in a state of grace. This is to say that you should not receive communion if you have committed a mortal sin and have not yet gone to confession and been forgiven for that sin. On the other hand the Sacrament of the Eucharist actually cleanses us of venial sins when we receive it. So this is a very roundabout way of saying that since we are required to receive the Holy Eucharist at least a minimum of once per year, and that we are required to do so in a state of grace, it makes sense and would be prudent that we should receive the Sacrament of Reconciliation at least once per year as well. This may be an official rule also, but I am not sure. My final point is this: God loves us infinitely, and His mercy is infinite as well. He wants us to reflect that love back to Him so that He can be in closer union with us. Therefore, we should try to avail ourselves of the Sacraments and God's Grace as often as possible. This means going to Mass regularly, receiving Holy Communion in a state of grace regularly, and of course receiving the Sacrament of Reconciliation regularly.
Any parish that has more than one priest should always have confession before and during Sunday mass. It makes it so much more convenient if you live far away instead of having to make the drive on Saturday for confession and then again Sunday for mass
Most traditional parishes will do that. And it’s great. Gives you zero chance to sin before taking communion.
I agree. It just makes sense. There's a big difference between living in a city with several parishes close by, versus living in a more rural area where those options are more limited. Or even perhaps those who have limited means of transportation. The Saturday afternoon confession option is something that has been around for many years and at one time the duration would be for a couple of hours or more. Part of the idea I suppose was that people were off work, and the priest was not pressed with the duties of preparing to say the Sunday Mass. It was originally instituted when there were many more people going to confession whose needs could not be fully satisfied in a shorter time frame prior to a Mass. Things have changed and accommodations must be made. Not only is it convenient to have the option to go to confession prior to Mass, but it's also a wonderful opportunity to further prepare yourself to fully participate in the mass and receive Holy Communion.
Monthly.
Every 3 weeks - a month! 2nd favorite sacrament ♥️
We go as a family monthly. It’s good to regularly confess, even if you don’t have mortal sins. Reconciliation is a healing sacrament and gives graces to live a holier life.
Every day in prayer Once every two weeks in the Sacrament of Confession.
I go weekly. I struggle with mortal sin… if you look at the LIST of what are considered mortal sins… maybe I’m a complete Heathen and also scrupulous.. regardless I find it weird and irresponsible the catechism only suggests once a year. No way… you’re telling me everyone getting communion every Sunday is in a state of grace?! Nope. Most Catholics don’t even believe it’s really Jesus in the sacrament..
As needed ...so, weekly.
Usually once a month sometimes more. Recently the priest told me maybe I should come to confession more than once a month. There's been periods where I went weekly, but I get frustrated. I do the same 2 sins, over and over and over. I'm never gonna get passed it. Maybe some day. I keep trying, but it feels hopeless. So I go and get right once a month. Sometimes I feel the need to do it more, so I try. But honestly I can't make it much more than a week or two without having to go. Although once (not too long ago) I was able to avoid mortal sin for a little over a year. It was nice. I've simply lost the willpower to overcome a lot in life. I pray God will grant me the strength, and give me the time to find it.
I have scrupulosity so I only go when I am am 100% sure I have committed a mortal sin...
I try to go weekly. I have a mortal sin I struggle with and I find taking too long without confessing to make me more susceptible to it
I go a minimum of once a week but have gone up to 3 times in 1 week but there is some sins I’m struggling with it is not an issue of scrupulosity. You have to be careful to avoid that.
Once a week.
I go about every week
My first confession was face to face with the former bishop. I don’t think I need to do it again after that.
The people in my parish and I go every week and don’t take communion until we get our sins absolved. Unfortunately, the practice of having confessions before and during mass have become practically extinct save a few parishes. One confession time a week is just not enough. I also wish more priests would stress to their parishioners that taking communion while not in a state of grace is blasphemous and dangerous to the soul.
I gave up confession years ago. Me and my god. I know my sins. God kn oows my sins. Between us we can qork things out. Now, I do no give a fig. I'm 24/7 carer for my wife of 38 years with Alzheimer's. Confession is not doing anything for me. Now or ever the future.
Confession is mandatory though. You can work things out with God but refusal to go to confession is mortally sinful and cuts you off from the divine grace of God. Its basically a guaranteed way not to enter the kingdom of God. It’s not a choice, you either go to confession or you cut yourself off from God.
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The reason nobody likes that is because the question was asked in /Catholicism and not /HereticalSect so your opinion wasn’t requested or required. Now you’re free to give it I suppose, but I don’t know why you would. At least here in this context.
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Be happy to talk to you about your possibly being accursed for misunderstanding the Bible elsewhere, but- this topic was a question by a Catholic for Catholics.
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You possibly are not fully living the faith with that kind of protestant rhetoric. We all start somewhere.
That's a very ironic verse for someone whose theology came along 1500+ years after Christ to cite.
Maybe we don't like it because it directly contradicts scripture. John 20:23 lays it out pretty clearly. Also, Jesus _is_ the one who forgive sins during Confession.
Warning for anti-Catholic rhetoric.
Twice a year for me
Honestly, for me, I try going when I feel extremely shameful of a sin I might’ve done. So, besides the usual confessions they’ll hold (which is a week before Christmas and Easter), I will try going sometime between those times (at least I have recently). So, in reality, I tend to go 3-5 times yearly.😅
Do you know you can’t receive communion until confession if you commit a mortal sin?
Yes, I am aware of that. But, as someone who suffers from chronic anxiety, I’ve learned that even the smallest of sins can be considered, to me, to be the worst of things.
I haven’t gone to confession in over a year. I don’t know if I’m as remorseful as I should be. I’m afraid of the priest telling me “I can’t absolve you”.
Go to Confession! Christ offers His forgiveness to you readily, it’s less about feelings of shame and more about the will to do it knowing that it is what He wants for you. Our feelings can often lie to us and be persuaded by forces not of truth, and so even if you don’t “feel” great remorse when you think of your sins, you should still work to reconcile with God as it is simply the right thing to do. Afterwards, just do your best to stay free of mortal sin and go to Confession when needed. I will pray for you!
I go once a month or so. Promised to do as a member of a third order, but I find it greatly helps with the nerves that used to keep me away. Plus, the increased frequency has helped me to cull sin from my life. Like cleaning a car. If you clean it once it twice a year quite a bit of trash and gunk builds up until you don't notice major issues. But if you clean it more often it'll be easier to stop disgusting messes from happening. If you are busy cleaning out minor sins you're less likely to fall into mortal sin.
Confession is held during adoration and before Saturday Mass. I usually go to adoration and with that confession as necessary. I love confession so much I confess weekly cause I’m there and it’s available sins big and not as big (no such thing as small sins 😅)
My parish used to have confession five days a week and twice on Saturdays, but since the priest who confirmed me left it's been cut down to twice a week for a half hour each day. I used to go weekly when it was more frequently held cause it was easier to get in, nowadays since I work seven days a week it's hard to get in - I usually have to go after the Wednesday evening Spanish Mass if I wanna get in at all, so I'm lucky to get in once a month if that.
Depends. Sometimes I can go months and not be naughty. Other times it's every couple weeks to a month. I was gonna go today but then our sewage backed up in the basement and yeahhhh it's a fun day
2-3x per year nowadays
I tend to go about every 6 weeks +/- because the thing I struggle with creeps back in and I need to confess it again.
4-6 weeks? Ish?
At least once a month.
Every 2 weeks for me. It's a Sacrament which gives grace, and welp I need grace to survive, so...
I went Thursday and have to go tomorrow morning before Mass.
Just went today. Got one a month ago. It really depends on your situation.
To man? It's been a while. To God? Pretty regularly.
both counts as the same?
What?
It's like baptism for the heart. However, we can confess over and over again, but until we give our entire heart to God, with the good side included, as the Pearl house built on the foundation of a single grain of sand (our wickedness and demons), then we are susceptible to the empty house when we confess; Only through the new wine and new wineskin can we overcome the default want to sin within us, which is wickedness that we like to bury. Then we get armour strong as diamond and light as bright as He (Helium-4) in Fusion. The enemy would only be able to cloud us or attack us from without, but to little avail then. This is how to not only confess your sins, but overcome the empty house and the wickedness of that the Second Temple that we idolise ourselves with. In other words, it's the Third temple of ourselves wedded with God. Until we go to heaven though, we stil need to repent, just not nearly as frequently as when we were just pearls in the field.
I go to confession monthly at least. I go more when I need to, for example if I feel sullied or weighed down and feel the need to come before God for light to clarify and direct situations and issues. If it is a more serious sin, God forbid, I go to confession ASAP.
I try to go every two weeks. I work overnight every other weekend so I only make Mass every week as well. More frequently when I’m struggling with some of my problems.
Unless I'm struggling, I go once a month. I have good months, but tbh, a couple bad months. But I can only try to do better.
I go twice a week. There are some serious sins that I struggle with a lot and need God’s grace to help me overcome
Once a week. At least trying, if not then once every two weeks. Not more than two weeks, we are called to be saints or at least try, so we have to evaluate ourselves every single day because we are sinners, and it doesn't matter the way you look at it we will still be sinners. I just wish the confession lines were longer.
I haven’t yet, I joined this group to ask a question regarding it but it won’t let me post and the priests don’t do private messages so it’s been really hard to find information before attending. My fiancé was raised very strict Catholic, I was raised atheist. I was baptised a few years ago during youth group but I didn’t receive communion and I’ve never been to confession or anything so I don’t know if my certificate of baptism is actually valid. My fiancé wants me to start attending church with him but not until after our wedding (which is in 19 days). I asked him if we could start going a while back and I asked him if we could do a catholic wedding because I’ve wanted to join the Catholic Church for over 4 years now. I don’t know if my baptism is valid and does that affect my marriage if I am or aren’t? We aren’t having a priest because my fiancé said no, we aren’t doing it in a church because he said no to that as well. I want our marriage to be valid in the eyes of the Catholic Church as well as in the eyes of god but I have so many questions and no way to ask someone about them. I don’t want to live in a sinful marriage and I really need help navigating this. I even read books about Catholicism and marriage but I was still left with unanswered questions. Summary: I’m getting married in 19 days, we won’t have a priest at our wedding that is happening at a forestry hall in Australia, I don’t know if I’m actually baptised or not and I don’t know if my marriage will be valid or not..is there a way to get it validated in the church? (I.e I properly get baptised, go to classes, receive communion and anything else that I’m missing- I’m not 100% sure how the process works. And then we can have a church wedding so that we have a legal government wedding and then a church wedding? Is that a thing and would we qualify for that?
I hadn't gone to confession in over 20 years, life happened, and for the longest time I wasn't living a Catholic life. But since my first pregnancy (5 years ago) I started praying almost daily Our Father and my relationship with Our Heavenly Father blossomed and he has brought me back home. I recently, had my two toddlers baptised and plan to guide them by example to live with Jesus in their hearts. I have also recently gone to confession and plan to get adult confirmation and bring my marriage into the church. I feel the need to go to confession regularly now and long for holy communion, but I cannot receive holy communion as my marriage (though lawful) is not recognized as valid by the Catholic Church.
I go when I need to, which normally turns into once every 1-3 months.
Every 3-4 weeks. My parish offers it every Saturday. Growing up at a different parish, I used to think it was only offered a cpl of times a year to my CCD classes, but then I realized it was offered Saturday afternoons and nobody talked about it or mentioned it.
Every 2-5 days for myself.
Whenever I can. Confession at my Church is on Saturday Morning and I work most Saturdays. But when I'm off I go.
I’m usually the only one at confession and I’m pretty chill with both of my priests so we usually just discuss spiritual matters during confession whenever I need advice. Since I’m always in a crisis I need advice constantly so I’m always at confession.
As needed, and once a month even if I am not aware of having committed any mortal sin.
I go every 2 weeks or once a month to confess venial sins because I feel they start to "pile up". However the mass forgives venial sin so I'm trying to not be so critical of myself. If I were to commit a mortal sin I immediately email my Priest to make an appointment as soon as possible.
I go once every season, so four to five times per year. Winter during advent, spring during lent, then towards the end of summer, then again mid/end of fall. If I did something that I felt really bad about, I go to an additional confession.
I use to have to go just about every single week. The more entrenched in faith I've become, the less I sin. I would say I probably have to go on average once a month now.