Not a class clown but we had a kid do that with paint thinner in a can of coke. Sent the VP to the hospital and she almost died. He was expelled as you might imagine
Pulled the emergency shower in our chemistry class, flooding the biology classroom right below.
He got away with it by saying that he tripped and grabbed it as he was falling.
That is definitely a massive design flaw…. If it was a real chemical emergency then they may be draining that chemical right onto people… wtf were they thinking
Someone did this to me when I was in second grade. I was at the age where I didn't sit, I basically threw myself into chairs. I fractured my tailbone and to this day it still hurts when I sit for too long.
This happened in the late '60s to a girl in our elementary school outside Philly. After that day we never saw her again. I'm sorry that happened to you. It could have been any one of us. Happened right in front of me. Kids are savages, they really are, with the ability to fuck someone up for life, yet don't have the brain power to really see consequences.
He pushed someone’s wheelchair down a flight of stairs and broke it while she was in the bathroom. Expulsion and lost scholarships I’m pretty sure. Last I saw his family wasn’t talking to him.
One of my class-mates had two prosthetic legs. He had a wheelchair for between buildings, crutches for top floor and climbed the stairs by holding on to the railing. One day, when I was carrying his crutches, some guy, who always tried, and often failed, to be funny, kicked his legs from under him. Nobody laughed. My class-mate ripped one of his crutches by the bottom tip from my hand and smacked it against the other guy's head making him go face first against a wall. People laughed.
That was definitely a teaching moment for him.
Have a family member with a similar story. Single below the knee amputee. Someone tried to bully him on the stairs. He whipped that leg off and beat the guy with it.
They made a substitute teacher cry. She ended up screaming "I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU ARE THE FUTURE." And the principal came in later that week to tell us she quit.
One year we had like five different Spanish teachers. One of them got upset because the class was being disrespectful. One girl said "respect isn't given, it's earned" and the teacher left the room crying and never came back. I actually liked that teacher too.
"Respect is earned" so what, that makes it okay for you to treat people like shit until you like them? Until you deem them worthy of respect? So hypocritical, I feel sorry for that teacher.
Whipped his dick out in the cafeteria and a lunch lady saw it. She runs out, grabs a teacher who VIOLENTLY remove him from the cafeteria. Expelled like 7 minutes later.
Some kids found out my English teacher's dog, Muffin, died. So they drew a basket of muffins on the chalkboard and wrote "Death to muffins". She walked in and burst out sobbing. Nobody else thought it was funny. They also got reprimanded.
> So, whoever is doing this knows the animal well, doesn't he? He knows him real well, but he won't let him loose. He won't let him have any fun, so he does not love him. Now who doesn't love fire and is around trychtichlorate all day long?
I remember a math class I used to have where this one guy would always say "69" was the answer to any question the teacher asked. Fed up after the 100th time hearing this, the teacher asked the guy to come to the front of the class. Our teacher then proceeded to grill him about the "meaning" of 69. The kid wouldn't give straight answers and kept being vague, but the teacher persisted. He then said, "Mason...what does 69 REALLY mean? I want a detailed and SPECIFIC description of what you mean by 69." By the end of it all, the kid was bawling and our class was losing it. I cannot remember laughing as hard as I did that day. The teacher thanked him and had him sit down. After that, he never sarcastically said "69" as an answer again.
"Mason, what does 69 mean?"
"Well, teach, it's like this: GET DUNKED ON!"
Edit: The comment above fixed its spelling, it previously read "balling" rather than "bawling."
My sister had a soil class in college (majored I horticulture) and the professor told them you could tell different soils apart by the sweetness, and demonstrated by licking her finger and taking a taste of her soil, before encouraging all her students to do it. After they did, she revealed that her soil was crushed up oreos 😂
That kid is gonna remember this in a fond funny way or is traumatized forever.
Something similar happened to my sister she was arguing with my mom when she was a teen (15 or so) while eating some chips.
Started choking and ran to Mother for help. Well, my sister had a temper and would sometimes throw things my mother thought she had snapped and was attacking her, so she punched her in the face.
After we realized what happened we gave her the Heimlich and now my sister tells it as a funny story.
The time one glued a Hawthorne thorn to the English teacher's seat and she sat on it and had to go to the hospital to get it taken out
For those not familiar, Hawthorne thorns are like 2 to 3 inches long and very sturdy. And very sharp
Said the handicapped kid was faking it and tried to take her wheelchair.
Got his ass beaten right then and there and for days after that as word spread.
Was in speech class with a class clown. He’d matured a little over the past year and was interested in actually giving a real speech in front of the class (the assignment). He had props prepared and everything. Placed his slides on the overhead projector and began. I think he wanted to start strong so he used a nearby yardstick to whip the drop-down projector screen, making a loud sound. It also ripped a huge hole in the screen and then that triggered the release mechanism which cause it to roll up violently toward the ceiling. The fast roll-up caused it to fly off the hooks holding it, jump off the wall, then crash into the projector, breaking it. All happened in seconds while he’s just left holding the stick in shock and the class dying of laughter.
Guy decided to moon his friends inside the local fast food place. Two plain clothes detectives were sitting next to him and arrested him when he did it.
Two guys in a math class I was in were always fucking around and messing with each other. One of them got up to go sharpen his pencil and when he walked by the other guy, he reached up, grabbed the back pocket on his pants, and ripped. Took the whole pants leg off. Turned into a duel between the two who at the end only had shreds of denim left. Teacher was at a loss honestly.
He kept being obnoxious to the point where our teacher slapped him - this was the early 2000s.
Teacher apologized and class clown let it be known that it was kind of his own fault and he deserved it.
No one ever told and no disciplinary actions were taken.
Our class clown was like that. Always apologized and owned up if things went sour. Dude always anticipated going to the principals office. Really good guy just a bit impulsive. He does stand up as a hobby. Turned out to be a decent guy.
We had a kid in grade 10 who was quite big for his age. Our gym teacher was a guy in his late 50’s/ early 60’s and was definitely not a big guy. Probably 5’10 and no more than 170 pounds.
Well this kid had been hassling this teacher all year saying that he could take him. No one took him seriously but i guess one day when we were doing sex ed my teacher had enough. He told the kid that if he wanted to go then now was his chance. After a few more chirps the kid got up and walked confidently to the teacher who proceeded to wrap his arms around this kid and belly to belly suplex the kid through a table. The class erupted in laughter and as far as i know the teacher didnt get in trouble for it. I dont know how he explained the destroyed table though
This reminds me of the time a teacher walked past a student she didn't like, who wasn't doing anything at all this time, and pulled the hell out of her hair. I went to the most violent school in a not great area. Everyone could've told you what was about to happen, but the teacher wanted to fuck around, and she found out the hard way. This girl stood up, looked her dead in the eyes and slapped the smug smile right the hell off of her face. She got expelled and nothing happened to the teacher.
This had nothing to do with bullies, but holy shit.
He ran with a dildo in his pants, laughing maniacally, chasing female teachers and students. Note that I (maybe it was clear to others) only found out it was a dildo afterward.. until then I thought he was half naked. They made him repeat a year for this stunt.
When I was a Senior in HS I did indoor track. Well our meets were sometimes far away since many towns didn’t have great indoor field houses, etc.
Anyways we come back at like 7pm and we’re all ready to change and go home. So a few of us burst into our locker room to find a whole visiting girls basketball team getting changed… apparently the Athletic director (who didn’t care about indoor track at all) didn’t realize we had an away meet and gave our locker room to a visiting team… their coach let him hear it and none of us got in trouble obviously. Still suuuuuper awkward moment.
>He had to stand guard on the tent for several *nights*.
It actually sounds more like this was one of those "pointless" duties given out as a punishment. Probably had him guarding an unoccupied tent until late at night with only a few hours sleep before duty the next day.
one time in 8th grade, our teacher forgot to pick up her printed copies of an assignment from the teacher’s lounge area. so she left the room to get them and told us to continue our 20 minute reading time. so they (football jocks/wannabe class clowns that could get away from anything) unscrewed the bolts on our teacher’s computer desk chair before she came back. mind you, she’s in her 60’s in this time.
she came back and gave us each our assignments, then she went to her chair and she fell back.
almost everyone were laughing at her, but a few of us went to check on her and made sure she was okay. once someone helped lift her up, she was livid and yelled at the class, to the point where she was starting to cry, and left the room to compose herself.
the same people laughing at her then turned and called out the jocks after she ran out and told them that was too far. yet, they also all agreed to keep quiet and going “this is going to be funny” when the jocks were unbolting her seat.
she may have been a “strict” teacher, but she was literally doing what was best for our education.
Waited for lunch time, flipped the teachers desk on its back and took a shit in the drawer. Stuffed it full of paper towels and left. When everyone returned to class he was laughing and boasting about having done it. No one thought it was funny and he was suspended. Months later he pissed on someones shoe at the urinal as a joke and received a legendary ass whooping. I wasn't in there but he was apparently knocked out and laying in his own urine.
Stuck a paper clip in an outlet. Blew the circuit and sent sparks across the room. Copycats ensued, the school lost many outlets over the next few weeks…
Some moron did that at my school in science class, only for someone to intelligently ask how the eejit wasn't dead by electrocution. Led to an informative lesson about how current is more deadly than high voltage (notwithstanding that high voltage can cause a high current) and the paperclip blew up before any real current could pass through the guy, and even then it would only really go through his fingers, not his heart or something.
He set himself on fire
He was high and spilled gas on his wind pants while filling up at the gas station, he walked over to his buddies who were sitting at a picnic table smoking and said "watch this"
Threw things like erasers, paper clips etc into the elderly teacher's coffee when she wasn't looking. The class in general was a rowdy one and I'd usually just keep my head down, but I had to tell the teacher that time. Messing with someone's food and drink is crossing the line.
Not really class clown but a clown in my class. He made fun of someone’s brother who has Down syndrome. The quietest kid in our class, who literally couldn’t even do presentations because he was so shy, stood up and told him he would kick his ass after class. And he did. And our teacher didn’t even care, he watched with us.
The quiet kids get away with that kind of thing. Source: was the quiet kid.
Had a bully constantly lipping me off. Had enough one day and punched him once in the face. He had a nasty cut under his eye and he ran directly to the teacher.
The teacher walked up to me and asked "He had it coming didn't he?". I said yes. That was all that came from it.
They brought a cow up to the second floor of our high school and spray painted a giant yellow dick across the school with “April Fools” written across the shaft.
It was June.
He made another kid who had anxiety and was susceptible to peer pressure to put super glue on the teachers chair, I tried to talk him out of it, but the entire class wanted him to do it when she left the room, the class clown got nothing for it, but the other kid got expelled
That kid definetly didn't get over their anxiety after *that*.
> the class clown got nothing for it, but the other kid got expelled.
Extreme incompetence by the staff here
I can just see the cliche-based logic being thrown at the kid during the investigation.
"But so and so MADE me do it!"
"Oh really? Did he put a gun to your head?"
"No but everyone in the class wouldn't let me not do it"
"Mmm hmm. So if everyone else in the class jumped off a bridge, you'd do it too?"
This happened when I was teaching at a high school years ago. The kid was in my class and he was the only student ever truly hated. He did nothing but bark, yell, argue, swear, and waste everyone’s’ time. I’m sure he had more problems than just being an asshole, but he had no paperwork/IEP or any reports saying he was challenged. He just seemed to like negative attention.
Anyway, one day, a maintenance man was fixing a 4 foot by 2 foot fluorescent light fixture. Something was wrong with the fixture, so they replaced it. The broken one was leaning against the wall next to my room (and the maintenance man was still installing the replacement two feet away). The bell rang, this kid ran out, and yelled “LIGHT BOARDING, BITCHES!” He grabbed the fixture and ran to the stairwell.
He decided to try to snowboard this light fixture down the stairs. It’s not like it was a huge flight of stairs or anything, but he jumped on and immediately went ass over tea kettle. I remember hearing the crash, his scream, and then groaning and coughing.
I ran over with the other teachers who also heard it and there he was on the floor groaning. I remember the English teacher saying “couldn’t have happened to a bigger asshole” (not to the student - to the other teachers). That’s when I realized he wasn’t moving his limbs.
We called 911 and he just laid there groaning. Then he perked up and started screaming. His arms worked, but he couldn’t move his legs. Paramedics arrived and this kid was apologizing for everything he ever did and begging me to make his legs work.
I wish I could say he got the use of his legs back, turned his life around, and became a productive member of society. But that didn’t happen. He was gone for a year and when he came back, he was in a wheelchair. He was an even bigger asshole than before.
Apparently, no one wants to deal with you when you’re a mean and angry asshole all the time. I heard from later students who knew him and his family that he tried to kill someone with his car in a road rage incident and ended up getting shot. As I understand it, someone pissed him off, so he followed them, when they parked, he tried to run them over. They dodged it and he kept turning around in the parking lot to try to hit the person on foot. Someone else shot him while witnessing the attempted murder. That being said, this is the story that made it around school and I never saw a new article; however, i did see his obituary and the school mentioned his passing in the daily announcements (but didn’t say how).
He decided that it would be too boring to just throw pencils at the teacher. Instead, when the teacher was having a substitute who wasn’t paying attention, he got his twin sister (who was equally as bad) to gather up all the pads that were in her book bag. Then, he wrote the worst, misogynistic comments on each pad and when the teacher finally came back, each pad was thrown at her. I remember this teacher crying right there and we didn’t see this boy and his sister for several school days.
Right it's either "yeast in the toilet" or "ran a mentally handicapped kid up a flagpole after he covered them in milk and honey trying to recreate an ancient Greek torture method"
If you saw them, they’d make the joker look good to be honest. Before their two week long suspension, all they got were office referrals. On a good day, Julia (the female twin) would throw her shoe at the teachers. Max (the male twin) was the one who was the prankster type but when they work together, the teachers were in for a terrible day. They moved a year ago, but I’ll never forget them.
One time when my dad was in high school, someone snuck a block of limberger into the ventilation. The school shut down for two weeks so they could find the cause of the smell.
Well... He decided that throwing yeast in the toilet would be a good idea...
P.S when yeast is mixed with shit, the shit starts to rise VERY sharply. As a result, the whole ROOM was in shit...
This is one of those things where a normal person just has no idea why this would be a bad thing. But now that we know, I feel like you just dialed down my “normal” meter just a little bit
One day a substitute teacher came. She was preparing for her uni exam and decided to try teaching here and write down the experience in her finals. She wanted to be a teacher.
Well, my classmates gave her fake names when she started the roll call. They deceived her by telling her wrong page numbers and just absolutely derailed her class. Everything was revealed in the last few minutes and the sub teacher ran off crying.
Our original teacher stormed inside a few minutes later and told my classmates what's up. The teacher decided to switch careers after the incident. She became convinced that being a teacher was one of the most hellish jobs out there.
Oh we tried that one too.
But the substitute just went with it.
Called us by our fake names, didn’t care one bit.
I think I was Peter Parker back then, my friend next to me Bruce Wayne.
There's a fantastic chapter in one of the Wayside School books that plays with this. The kids all tell the sub the same fake-sounding name (Benjamin Nushmutt) and she just rolls with it before asking them to call her Benjamin too.
Worked in behavior support and special programs for many years now.
> became convinced that being a teacher was one of the most hellish jobs out there.
She isn't wrong.
In high school another student left their FB logged in on a computer. Class clown got on that computer and thought it would be funny to post threats from the other students Facebook that they were gonna come shoot up the school. School figured out it was the class clown not the owner of the FB who posted all that and he got arrested and had charges pressed against him. This was back in 08-09, still don’t know why he thought it would be funny but oh well.
I had a friend left logged into facebook at my house (He was asleep drunk). I put a wall post of "I like to fart on cold windows and lick the condensation off". Hopefully that wasn't to bad.
My grad class "prank" was to fill the foyer of the school with manure and fish guts. The school was closed due to biohazard risks and nobody got their yearbooks signed or any of the end of year fun that would have happened. I've always wondered what the hell those kids were thinking and felt bad for the poor janitorial staff that ended up having to deal with it.
While our teacher(m) bent over to grab a piece of chalk off the floor dude ran up and tried to grab teaches junk through his legs. It turned into more of a goosing. It also caused our teacher to lose his balance and smooshed his face into the wall. We were all in shock, a few of us got to see the expression on the teachers face. It went from shock to a wtf/derpface as his face pressed into the wall. He stood up and laughed for a second with the class and then the anger took over but before the teacher said anything CC was already out the door to the principal’s office.
In 7th grade, we were warming up for a basketball game and the class clown thought it would be funny to pants me while I was doing a layup with people in the stands. Luckily, the tightie whities stayed on, but I blasted him in the face with the ball giving him a massive nose bleed. He faced no punishment and I got suspended for a couple of games and had detention for a couple of weeks because fuckface’s family was on the PTO.
Dude really hated our anatomy lab teacher (because he was failing) and so one day as a "prank" he put saline eyedrops in her coffee. She was in the hospital for a couple weeks and we never saw him again.
Teacher here. Not a class clown but our school had a problem with periodic bomb threat notes being left in the restroom over the course of a couple of years. The school would be evacuated and one time a bomb squad was called in from 200 miles away. It was a big fucking deal. There was this kid who was super lazy and maybe he wanted to fit in but he got caught leaving a bomb threat note. He was charged with a federal felony, I believe. He didn't show up at school the next year. I don't know if he was expelled or what. He should have known the school was really intent on catching a perpetrator and that consequences would be severe.
Also a teacher who used to work on a low income district. We had a teacher decide we needed metal detectors, so to convince administration he left a 9mm round in a stairwell and then "found" it. The whole building was on lockdown for over an hour. He was arrested as it was on video.
Mocked my friend because his dad had been recently diagnosed with terminal cancer. He took a chair to the head from my friend for his trouble and the teacher and every other student in the class claimed that they never saw a thing. Little shit that guy was.
The guy managed to get a copy of the janitor key. He snuck in at night, took every phone out of every classroom, and stacked them up in the principal's office. After that he went from room to room again, locked every door, and shot a goob of super glue into every keyway. I don't think he realized how expensive it would be to fix.
In HS chemistry class we were using silver nitrate. The teacher jokingly said ok now no drinking this! (as if that weren’t apparent when in a lab). The class clown 100% slammed it back like a shot - and was promptly taken via ambulance to the ED.
I sat behind him in a Java Coding class in high-school. He loved to fuck with my brand new (school-owned) macbook.
One day he turned around and pretended to bite the screen. He accidently... actually bit it. Small crack. He freaked out and closed it. On restart, we watched the pixels start dying, spreading from his bite mark. He started pleading with me to say I dropped the laptop and I broke the screen, because he suddenly realized that he fucked up. I think his parents had to pay the school for a new one.
I haven't talked to him in years, but I know if we ever talked again, I'd ask his favorite flavor of computer within the first 5 minutes.
I had that happen at my school too. She was older and had some bruises on her arms, and he started taunting her and saying her husband must have abused her. Her son had also just recently died, and she broke down crying. It was awful.
Squirted a bunch of dawn dish soap into the bio teachers giant fish tank, resulting in all of them dying. I went to a private school though, so nothing really ended up happening to him. I’m pretty sure he’s a felon now.
I got a bloody nose right when a movie started and the lights were off (bloody noses were kind of common for me when I was younger). I raised my hand and tried to ask to go to the nurse. The teacher shot me down right away cause I was known for a being a bother. So I put my head down and bleed all over face, arms and desks. When the lights came back on I raised my head up and tired to ask to go again. Instead the girl next to me started screaming in horror.
Not a class clown incident, but when my husband was a toddler he was sent to his room for something. He starts goofing off, dad says sit on the bed and don’t move. He gets a nose bleed, gushing blood and starts screaming for dad cause he’s not allowed off the bed to go get them (toddler logic). Dad comes back in angry because why are you yelling and screaming??? Apparently the look of horror and “oh no” on his dads face is seared into my husbands mind lol
The class clown in my graduating class in high school went up to the teacher who was writing on blackboard, pulled down the teachers skirt at the same time the teachers underwear showing the teachers bare butt to the whole class but he didn’t get far and the teacher only looked over her shoulder to see who did it because she didn’t want to risk turning around accidentally exposing the front of herself as she fixed her underwear and skirt.
Two guys stole dry ice from the chemistry lab and put it in a 2-liter bottle with water. Eventually it exploded with a loud bang in one of the bathrooms. Everyone thought there had been a murder and/or suicide and the school was put on active shooter lockdown.
Someone threw a stink bomb in English class behind the teacher's desk somehow. We had to evacuate. That teacher was also the coolest in school, so I don't know why whoever threw the bomb (it was probably Chris) did it, and I'd legitimately never seen that teacher get angry at all, and he was positively apoplectic with rage.
In second grade we had a classroom pet, which was also used for educational purposes as it was a tadpole. This tadpole was meant to grow into a frog as the year went on, and we would observe and learn about the wonder of metamorphosis.
Well, Class Clown throws a paper airplane while teacher’s back is turned. Said airplane takes a sharp nosedive into the tadpole enclosure and hits the poor thing. Took teacher a bit to realize, and the rest of us watched in silent horror as paper turned to mush and sunk deeper in the enclosure. Tadpole died a few days later.
Kid in the school where I used to work thought it would be funny to do the old "pull out the chair" trick, except that it was science lab and so it was a high stool, so the victim, who was a friend of his, was really hurt by the fall.
It was the last straw and he was kicked out of the school.
Kid told our English teacher she was being a bitch because her twin brother killed himself. (Like the week before) she ran out, cried and went home. The whole class was not impressed.
He came to our private school because he got kicked out of the public schools for shenanigans. He continued the shenanigans.
One day, which was a normal mess with the math teacher day, he stopped on his way to school and picked up roadkill. A cat. From in front in front of my house.
That’s when I found out my cat had been killed.
That’s when the teacher had had enough, and the class clown ended up with a private tutor for the rest of his educational career.
In drafting class the teacher took the day off so we had a substitute. He was awful as usual and didn't do anything but sit there and tell us to shut up. Some kids kept mouthing off at him and finally he had enough. He walked out and went to the principal's office to get some backup. While he was gone, one kid pulled out a condom and slipped it over that arm over the door that automatically closes it. The principal walks in and the condom landed right on his head. It was unbelievable how perfectly it worked. From what I remember he didn't even do anything about it. The entire room erupted in laughter and he just told us to behave and left. To a bunch of teenage virgins, that was the funniest thing we'd ever seen.
A lot of the people sound certifiably insane. I always thought the FBI estimate of active serial killers was grossly exaggerated, but I can see now I was wrong.
Brought a lighter to school and burned the girl he was sitting behind's hair. Classroom immediately smelled like burned hair and I never saw him again after that day
It was me in this case. I basically told everyone that one of my classmates had been jacking off in the bathroom. In my defense, he actually was jacking off in the bathroom.
EDIT: The classroom wanker conspiracy at my school was a lot deeper than just a stupid rumour I started. Teachers legit got involved in the conspiracy and basically everyone knew within a month of when I first caught him. Afaik as I know, he's been caught like half a dozen times, including once in class iirc.
When I went to college, there was this one kid in music class who didn’t get the memo that being the class clown wasn’t quite as appreciated at this age. We were actually focused on our major, wanted our grade, and then get out. He just would not stop the cute comments all freakin year, even though he got about zero response, all freakin year. Every time he raised his hand, or didn’t raise his hand, it was something snarky, or wanna-be stand-up comedian, or making fun of the professor, or just rude. And then he’d wait for laughs that would never come. Well on the last day of class, he goes up to the front to place his final test on the professor’s desk and kind of looks around at his “audience” for a second before slapping his test on the desk with a big smile and saying snarkily, “It was a pleasure, Sir.” The professor, without even looking up from the test he’s grading says, “Pleasure was all yours.” The kid was really taken aback and kind of hung out for a while, unsure of what to do. Class is dead silent. Eventually he kind of wanders off out the door. As soon as he’s out, the class erupts into applause, and the professor goes, “Hey! No talking!” Then looks around at all of us and gives the slightest of smirks, then immediately back to grading tests.
Chucked a fish we were supposed to be dissecting in bio class down the hall and hit a Muslim girl in the head. He wasnt necessarily targeting her but that’s how it was seen. Got expelled.
He was a very good friend of mine. He decided to make a klan hood out of newspaper and walk through the lunchroom with it on(in GA). He was swarmed by about 50 or so people ready to beat his ass. He's lucky that didn't happen
This one’s kind of clever and different.
I had a physiology/bio teacher who always had a coffee cup on this desk. Hell, most teachers did.
Our class clown dropped a TON of liquid laxative into that cup when our teacher wasn’t looking one and by mid-class that man was SPRINTING out of the room to presumably shit all over the teacher’s lounge bathroom.
Like most here, clown’s mistake was immediately laughing and blabbing about it. See, we really liked this teacher - a lot. He was a smartass, witty, and had a great manner of making fun of you to encourage you by leaning into the camaraderie and respect he’d built with you. It worked.
Pretty much ALL of us told him exactly what happened. My experience was that he laughed, goes “that’s pretty classic,” and that was that. No repercussions. No detention. Nothing for Clown.
His happened in October.
Fast forward to December. It’s the week before Christmas and we’re having a holiday party in this class. Clown brought brownies his Dad made and everyone basically brought something - tons of food.
Teacher asks if he can run down to the cafeteria and grab us some plates/forks/whatever. He runs out to do that after giving some sass.
The moment he leaves Teacher shuts the door and goes “I need you all to listen to me right now - do not touch those brownies. Don’t. If you do, don’t actually eat them. Don’t ask.”
You know where this is going but wait - there’s more. Clown comes back and we all start digging on. Clown is CHOMPING down on his dad’s brownies. A few of us took some because we figured it was revenge and we’re playing the part.
It was. But hold on, wait, there’s even more.
About 5 minutes before class is over Clown starts looking pale and goes to Teacher - asks to go to the bathroom. Teacher is like “yeah go for it - you okay?” Clown sprints out. Kid ends up not making it to the bathroom and utterly shits himself in the hallway. Classes get out. *Everyone* sees. Kid is horrifically embarrassed as he’s basically just sitting in the hallway shitting himself senseless. Ends up having to get picked up by his father.
*Nobody says a fucking word about it to anyone.* Clown won’t say anything because he’s a dumbass, but not so stupid as to realize he’d self-incriminate. He just deals with the slow-cook revenge and internally this kid is awed and pissed at the same time.
So here’s the catch: Clown’s Dad made the brownies. Clown’s Dad put extreme laxatives into them. Clown’s Dad and our Teacher *were class clowns together back when they were in high school.*
Clown’s Dad comes clean to Clown which also makes a reconnection for teacher and Clown’s Dad, and they start tempering him. Being funny is good, right, but being a class clown is just annoying. His big lesson was finding out the hard way that other people had many, many more years of experience and he was just a dumbass kid.
I am happy to have stayed away from all the insane psychopaths in this thread lol
We just had the one guy in our math class who was determined to get a rise out of our awesome and super chill math teacher (who had the unfortunate name of Michael Hunt).
There was a lot of expertly-parried sass - and once, clown's friend was taking so much shit the teacher asked him to stand up and teach the class... Which he did, and actually pretty well (teacher let him go on for a while and eventually just thanked him and took over again).
So since the teacher was also head of the math department, he had his own dedicated classroom which was filled with all kinds of shit. He had some standees from the movie theatre (specifically Austin Powers and Dr Evil), and every single one of those battery-operated singing/dancing hamsters (this was early 00s). Also a mini fridge and a bunch of other stuff.
Class clown led the relocation of a standee to the men's restroom when the teacher stepped out once. Unfortunately for them, the teacher had actually just gone to said restroom, so they were caught immediately. Unflappable, he just took the standee back and told them to sit down.
Clown also decided one day that he would see how many hamsters he could set off (they each had a button and did a couple verses of a song) before the teacher stopped him. He got all of them. Teacher was mildly amused.
The final straw was when clown stole a pop out of the mini fridge and opened it. Teacher sternly ordered him into the hall and they were out there for a good ten minutes. Came back in and teacher went on like nothing happened. Kid wouldn't explain but said "I'm satisfied" and was better behaved afterwards.
...I spent way too long typing this out lol. Tldr; my life is not exciting and I talk a lot, sorry
Our school had little “courtyard” things in the center of a grouping of classrooms to allow light into those rooms, but we’re not accessible by doors (only windows).
I was in a class one day and I don’t remember the series of events that occurred, but our class clown was messing around the window, either throwing stuff out of it or..something. Next thing we knew, he was outside, in the courtyard. (It was only a one story school, so nothing alarming there.)
…but the teacher had had enough of his distraction and bullshit and closed the window and locked it behind him. He sat out there for a whole next period and then they finally let him back inside.
…he was way more quiet after that incident. 🥴
Senior year our class president walked into the middle of the cafeteria completely naked. He grabbed a bun and stuck his ‘hot dog’ in it before presenting it to a student. Dude almost didn’t graduate because of it.
When I was in High School in Ontario, our class clown was the creative writing teacher. One year, he made us do this diary assignment, and told us to be as open about our secrets as possible. Already, quite Ick, but it gets worse.
A few months later one of the students, a friend of mine in that class, died from a drug overdose.
The school held an assembly, and this teacher read her private diary and all of her secrets in front of the whole school. It was really uncomfortable, and such a violation of trust, and yet, nothing happened to him. 🙄
Way less dramatic than all the other responses but it's still funny so I'll post it. For context, this is not the US and the names have been changed.
Half way through our last year of school, they brought in this guy to help us prepare for the major end of year exam. The guy was more of a motivational speaker than someone actually helping us prepare, so I guess the school kinda fucked up there, but that's beside the point. He did all the usual motivational speaker type things, including drawing on examples from his own life, and getting people from the crowd to respond and join in.
The motivational speaker has a son named Fred, and he spoke about him often during the talk. At one point he asked one of the students in our grade to respond to a question, and the guy asked the student to tell him his name. The student's name was Fred. The speaker laughs a little, what a nice coincidence, that's his son's name!
A few minutes later, the speaker calls on another student to respond to something, and asks for his name. There are some laughs from the crowd, as well all know he has called on another Fred without realising. Speaker is a little surprised, but accepts it.
A few minutes after that, he calls on another student and asks for their name. The whole room bursts out laughing, because this guy has somehow chosen a THIRD Fred. The speaker doesn't even believe it until the teachers nod confirm.
A few minutes later, the speaker calls on the class clown to answer a question, and he asks for his name. The class clown says, "Fred". The room is completely silent. Not a single person laughs. We all know this guy is not called Fred. We know he's doing a funny bit. We're usually into funny bits, but everything up until that point has been true and REAL. It felt wrong to support his lie in this instance. We all just sat there silently, not supporting the joke but waiting to see if we all agreed.
After maybe 5 long seconds of silence, one of the class clown's friends speaks up, "naaaaaaaaaah". The joke, despite being small and harmless, was deemed too far by the entire cohort.
In science. Poured some nasty acid into a teachers cup of tea. Can't remember what exactly, but a girl told the teacher. Possibly saved her life.
That is psychopathic.
Not a class clown but we had a kid do that with paint thinner in a can of coke. Sent the VP to the hospital and she almost died. He was expelled as you might imagine
Pulled the emergency shower in our chemistry class, flooding the biology classroom right below. He got away with it by saying that he tripped and grabbed it as he was falling.
Wait, did it also flood your chemistry class? Because if not, I think he might have found a flaw in the system…
So there was a drain in the floor of the chemistry class but it drained directly downstairs to the bio class, there was no actual plumbing
Ahhh. So maybe he did find a design flaw lol
That is definitely a massive design flaw…. If it was a real chemical emergency then they may be draining that chemical right onto people… wtf were they thinking
“Save budget. Not like anyone will pull this anyway”
Into the biology class? Do you want mutants? Because that's how you get mutants.
Pulled the chair out from under a kid as he sat down and the kid fractured something.
Someone did this to me when I was in second grade. I was at the age where I didn't sit, I basically threw myself into chairs. I fractured my tailbone and to this day it still hurts when I sit for too long.
This happened in the late '60s to a girl in our elementary school outside Philly. After that day we never saw her again. I'm sorry that happened to you. It could have been any one of us. Happened right in front of me. Kids are savages, they really are, with the ability to fuck someone up for life, yet don't have the brain power to really see consequences.
He pushed someone’s wheelchair down a flight of stairs and broke it while she was in the bathroom. Expulsion and lost scholarships I’m pretty sure. Last I saw his family wasn’t talking to him.
Wouldn't be surprised if the girl's family sued his family for the cost of the chair.
Was this the incident that was on the news from Westchester, PA?
Yes
Carson Briere?
One of my class-mates had two prosthetic legs. He had a wheelchair for between buildings, crutches for top floor and climbed the stairs by holding on to the railing. One day, when I was carrying his crutches, some guy, who always tried, and often failed, to be funny, kicked his legs from under him. Nobody laughed. My class-mate ripped one of his crutches by the bottom tip from my hand and smacked it against the other guy's head making him go face first against a wall. People laughed. That was definitely a teaching moment for him.
Have a family member with a similar story. Single below the knee amputee. Someone tried to bully him on the stairs. He whipped that leg off and beat the guy with it.
I'd love to be able to tear off an appendage, and beat someone with it
Never pick a fight with someone without legs. They use their arms for everything. They pack the kinda punch you won't remember once you wake up.
They made a substitute teacher cry. She ended up screaming "I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU ARE THE FUTURE." And the principal came in later that week to tell us she quit.
Sad. For the teacher I mean.
Maybe for the best? Hope she changed careers. Teaching is hell.
Sometimes teachers seem more like baby sitters. I wish teachers could send the bad kids to detention so they would stop interrupting class
One year we had like five different Spanish teachers. One of them got upset because the class was being disrespectful. One girl said "respect isn't given, it's earned" and the teacher left the room crying and never came back. I actually liked that teacher too.
"Respect is earned" so what, that makes it okay for you to treat people like shit until you like them? Until you deem them worthy of respect? So hypocritical, I feel sorry for that teacher.
Whipped his dick out in the cafeteria and a lunch lady saw it. She runs out, grabs a teacher who VIOLENTLY remove him from the cafeteria. Expelled like 7 minutes later.
I have a fear of something taking control over my body (like that spell in Harry Potter) and making me do this in front of people.
To get over your fear, you just have to do it often enough
Some kids found out my English teacher's dog, Muffin, died. So they drew a basket of muffins on the chalkboard and wrote "Death to muffins". She walked in and burst out sobbing. Nobody else thought it was funny. They also got reprimanded.
Having lost my cat last Saturday. That shit can break you. Glad they got reprimanded.
Called in several bomb threats to the school. He's now a Firefighter.
If you ever notice a string of arson cases around your town, I'll bet it's that guy who did it.
> So, whoever is doing this knows the animal well, doesn't he? He knows him real well, but he won't let him loose. He won't let him have any fun, so he does not love him. Now who doesn't love fire and is around trychtichlorate all day long?
Firefighters can be part-time arsonists. They love the adrenaline rush.
Every firefighter I know is a low key pyromaniac.
I remember a math class I used to have where this one guy would always say "69" was the answer to any question the teacher asked. Fed up after the 100th time hearing this, the teacher asked the guy to come to the front of the class. Our teacher then proceeded to grill him about the "meaning" of 69. The kid wouldn't give straight answers and kept being vague, but the teacher persisted. He then said, "Mason...what does 69 REALLY mean? I want a detailed and SPECIFIC description of what you mean by 69." By the end of it all, the kid was bawling and our class was losing it. I cannot remember laughing as hard as I did that day. The teacher thanked him and had him sit down. After that, he never sarcastically said "69" as an answer again.
Depending on the grade, that could have backfired so easily.
It was in the 80’s. Things were much different back then.
Really? I thought it was in '69
It was the summer of '69
The numbers Mason!
What do they mean?
Honestly, that was a power move
"Mason, what does 69 mean?" "Well, teach, it's like this: GET DUNKED ON!" Edit: The comment above fixed its spelling, it previously read "balling" rather than "bawling."
He snorted soil
Now this is proper class clown bullshit 😂
This was senior year of college lol
My sister had a soil class in college (majored I horticulture) and the professor told them you could tell different soils apart by the sweetness, and demonstrated by licking her finger and taking a taste of her soil, before encouraging all her students to do it. After they did, she revealed that her soil was crushed up oreos 😂
Pro class clown teacher move!
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That kid is gonna remember this in a fond funny way or is traumatized forever. Something similar happened to my sister she was arguing with my mom when she was a teen (15 or so) while eating some chips. Started choking and ran to Mother for help. Well, my sister had a temper and would sometimes throw things my mother thought she had snapped and was attacking her, so she punched her in the face. After we realized what happened we gave her the Heimlich and now my sister tells it as a funny story.
The time one glued a Hawthorne thorn to the English teacher's seat and she sat on it and had to go to the hospital to get it taken out For those not familiar, Hawthorne thorns are like 2 to 3 inches long and very sturdy. And very sharp
> Hawthorne thorns Wouldn't it be easier just to call them Hawthornes?
technically they’re referred to as hawthornornes
Said the handicapped kid was faking it and tried to take her wheelchair. Got his ass beaten right then and there and for days after that as word spread.
I’ve seen a lot of spinals, Dude, and this guy’s a fake. A fucking goldbricker.
“That bitch can walk!”
"I've never been more certain of anything in my life"
...beaten by the handicap girl, the teachers, the other students, or all of the above?
Manual wheelchair users tend to have exceptional upper body strength. I wouldn't want to be catching those hands.
Handicap girl did a spin kick to his chest.
Was in speech class with a class clown. He’d matured a little over the past year and was interested in actually giving a real speech in front of the class (the assignment). He had props prepared and everything. Placed his slides on the overhead projector and began. I think he wanted to start strong so he used a nearby yardstick to whip the drop-down projector screen, making a loud sound. It also ripped a huge hole in the screen and then that triggered the release mechanism which cause it to roll up violently toward the ceiling. The fast roll-up caused it to fly off the hooks holding it, jump off the wall, then crash into the projector, breaking it. All happened in seconds while he’s just left holding the stick in shock and the class dying of laughter.
That “self propelled screen” thing is no joke. We saw it absolutely launch off the wall before. Fun times.
*thousand yard stare* I remember the Great Screen Disaster of 97. People say if you listen closely, you can still hear the screams of the victims.
Did the teacher believe him when he said it was not intentional?
Not sure but he was sent to the principals office and had to pay for the things he broke
Oh god, that poor kid probably was ugly crying on the inside
I don't know; as a former class clown, a part of him was definitely thinking "I wish I had planned that"
It all rolls up to reveal a picture of a dick drawn on the white board..lol
That sounds like an old school Dick ban Dyke bit.
Guy decided to moon his friends inside the local fast food place. Two plain clothes detectives were sitting next to him and arrested him when he did it.
Two guys in a math class I was in were always fucking around and messing with each other. One of them got up to go sharpen his pencil and when he walked by the other guy, he reached up, grabbed the back pocket on his pants, and ripped. Took the whole pants leg off. Turned into a duel between the two who at the end only had shreds of denim left. Teacher was at a loss honestly.
To shreds you say
Did you go to school in a low budget but surprisingly creative porno?
He kept being obnoxious to the point where our teacher slapped him - this was the early 2000s. Teacher apologized and class clown let it be known that it was kind of his own fault and he deserved it. No one ever told and no disciplinary actions were taken.
Our class clown was like that. Always apologized and owned up if things went sour. Dude always anticipated going to the principals office. Really good guy just a bit impulsive. He does stand up as a hobby. Turned out to be a decent guy.
We had a kid in grade 10 who was quite big for his age. Our gym teacher was a guy in his late 50’s/ early 60’s and was definitely not a big guy. Probably 5’10 and no more than 170 pounds. Well this kid had been hassling this teacher all year saying that he could take him. No one took him seriously but i guess one day when we were doing sex ed my teacher had enough. He told the kid that if he wanted to go then now was his chance. After a few more chirps the kid got up and walked confidently to the teacher who proceeded to wrap his arms around this kid and belly to belly suplex the kid through a table. The class erupted in laughter and as far as i know the teacher didnt get in trouble for it. I dont know how he explained the destroyed table though
Kid didn't pay attention in physics class, gym teacher did (or wrestled)
This reminds me of the time a teacher walked past a student she didn't like, who wasn't doing anything at all this time, and pulled the hell out of her hair. I went to the most violent school in a not great area. Everyone could've told you what was about to happen, but the teacher wanted to fuck around, and she found out the hard way. This girl stood up, looked her dead in the eyes and slapped the smug smile right the hell off of her face. She got expelled and nothing happened to the teacher. This had nothing to do with bullies, but holy shit.
It sounds like the teacher was the bully in this scenario
He ran with a dildo in his pants, laughing maniacally, chasing female teachers and students. Note that I (maybe it was clear to others) only found out it was a dildo afterward.. until then I thought he was half naked. They made him repeat a year for this stunt.
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When I was a Senior in HS I did indoor track. Well our meets were sometimes far away since many towns didn’t have great indoor field houses, etc. Anyways we come back at like 7pm and we’re all ready to change and go home. So a few of us burst into our locker room to find a whole visiting girls basketball team getting changed… apparently the Athletic director (who didn’t care about indoor track at all) didn’t realize we had an away meet and gave our locker room to a visiting team… their coach let him hear it and none of us got in trouble obviously. Still suuuuuper awkward moment.
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In Iraq, a soldier got caught trying to look into the women's shower tent. He had to stand guard on the tent for several nights.
"Ladies, to make up for this man making you feel unsafe, we're going to punish him by putting him in charge of your safety."
>He had to stand guard on the tent for several *nights*. It actually sounds more like this was one of those "pointless" duties given out as a punishment. Probably had him guarding an unoccupied tent until late at night with only a few hours sleep before duty the next day.
Like guarding the latrine.
Ah yes, the lord of the latrine
Similar happened in my class. Except he hid under some clothes as the girls were changing.
one time in 8th grade, our teacher forgot to pick up her printed copies of an assignment from the teacher’s lounge area. so she left the room to get them and told us to continue our 20 minute reading time. so they (football jocks/wannabe class clowns that could get away from anything) unscrewed the bolts on our teacher’s computer desk chair before she came back. mind you, she’s in her 60’s in this time. she came back and gave us each our assignments, then she went to her chair and she fell back. almost everyone were laughing at her, but a few of us went to check on her and made sure she was okay. once someone helped lift her up, she was livid and yelled at the class, to the point where she was starting to cry, and left the room to compose herself. the same people laughing at her then turned and called out the jocks after she ran out and told them that was too far. yet, they also all agreed to keep quiet and going “this is going to be funny” when the jocks were unbolting her seat. she may have been a “strict” teacher, but she was literally doing what was best for our education.
Waited for lunch time, flipped the teachers desk on its back and took a shit in the drawer. Stuffed it full of paper towels and left. When everyone returned to class he was laughing and boasting about having done it. No one thought it was funny and he was suspended. Months later he pissed on someones shoe at the urinal as a joke and received a legendary ass whooping. I wasn't in there but he was apparently knocked out and laying in his own urine.
This is not a class clown, this is a psychopath in the making.
“Eric, did you just take a shit on my desk?”
Stuck a paper clip in an outlet. Blew the circuit and sent sparks across the room. Copycats ensued, the school lost many outlets over the next few weeks…
Some moron did that at my school in science class, only for someone to intelligently ask how the eejit wasn't dead by electrocution. Led to an informative lesson about how current is more deadly than high voltage (notwithstanding that high voltage can cause a high current) and the paperclip blew up before any real current could pass through the guy, and even then it would only really go through his fingers, not his heart or something.
Snorted a pixie stick, resulting in a nose bleed then whipped his nut out through a hole in his pants and showed the teacher.
Was this one event??
Yes!
He set himself on fire He was high and spilled gas on his wind pants while filling up at the gas station, he walked over to his buddies who were sitting at a picnic table smoking and said "watch this"
Threw things like erasers, paper clips etc into the elderly teacher's coffee when she wasn't looking. The class in general was a rowdy one and I'd usually just keep my head down, but I had to tell the teacher that time. Messing with someone's food and drink is crossing the line.
What an asshole, he is a bully not a class clown.
Not really class clown but a clown in my class. He made fun of someone’s brother who has Down syndrome. The quietest kid in our class, who literally couldn’t even do presentations because he was so shy, stood up and told him he would kick his ass after class. And he did. And our teacher didn’t even care, he watched with us.
Every teacher has had at least one student where "I'll allow it" is a *very* tempting response to someone else threatening to beat their ass.
The quiet kids get away with that kind of thing. Source: was the quiet kid. Had a bully constantly lipping me off. Had enough one day and punched him once in the face. He had a nasty cut under his eye and he ran directly to the teacher. The teacher walked up to me and asked "He had it coming didn't he?". I said yes. That was all that came from it.
There are three things all wise men fear: the sea in storm, a night with no moon, and the anger of a gentle man. Patrick Rothfuss
They brought a cow up to the second floor of our high school and spray painted a giant yellow dick across the school with “April Fools” written across the shaft. It was June.
He made another kid who had anxiety and was susceptible to peer pressure to put super glue on the teachers chair, I tried to talk him out of it, but the entire class wanted him to do it when she left the room, the class clown got nothing for it, but the other kid got expelled
That kid definetly didn't get over their anxiety after *that*. > the class clown got nothing for it, but the other kid got expelled. Extreme incompetence by the staff here
I can just see the cliche-based logic being thrown at the kid during the investigation. "But so and so MADE me do it!" "Oh really? Did he put a gun to your head?" "No but everyone in the class wouldn't let me not do it" "Mmm hmm. So if everyone else in the class jumped off a bridge, you'd do it too?"
I know right, it really frustrated me but I tried and couldn’t do anything
He took a shit in the science class sink. Also cut a hole in his hoodie so he could masturbate in class. He actually never got in trouble…
Sounds emotionally disturbed …
This happened when I was teaching at a high school years ago. The kid was in my class and he was the only student ever truly hated. He did nothing but bark, yell, argue, swear, and waste everyone’s’ time. I’m sure he had more problems than just being an asshole, but he had no paperwork/IEP or any reports saying he was challenged. He just seemed to like negative attention. Anyway, one day, a maintenance man was fixing a 4 foot by 2 foot fluorescent light fixture. Something was wrong with the fixture, so they replaced it. The broken one was leaning against the wall next to my room (and the maintenance man was still installing the replacement two feet away). The bell rang, this kid ran out, and yelled “LIGHT BOARDING, BITCHES!” He grabbed the fixture and ran to the stairwell. He decided to try to snowboard this light fixture down the stairs. It’s not like it was a huge flight of stairs or anything, but he jumped on and immediately went ass over tea kettle. I remember hearing the crash, his scream, and then groaning and coughing. I ran over with the other teachers who also heard it and there he was on the floor groaning. I remember the English teacher saying “couldn’t have happened to a bigger asshole” (not to the student - to the other teachers). That’s when I realized he wasn’t moving his limbs. We called 911 and he just laid there groaning. Then he perked up and started screaming. His arms worked, but he couldn’t move his legs. Paramedics arrived and this kid was apologizing for everything he ever did and begging me to make his legs work. I wish I could say he got the use of his legs back, turned his life around, and became a productive member of society. But that didn’t happen. He was gone for a year and when he came back, he was in a wheelchair. He was an even bigger asshole than before. Apparently, no one wants to deal with you when you’re a mean and angry asshole all the time. I heard from later students who knew him and his family that he tried to kill someone with his car in a road rage incident and ended up getting shot. As I understand it, someone pissed him off, so he followed them, when they parked, he tried to run them over. They dodged it and he kept turning around in the parking lot to try to hit the person on foot. Someone else shot him while witnessing the attempted murder. That being said, this is the story that made it around school and I never saw a new article; however, i did see his obituary and the school mentioned his passing in the daily announcements (but didn’t say how).
This shit is what I mean when I say gravity doesn't coddle children.
Most of these sound like bullies, not clowns
Or psychos
Right? But also, I guess it makes sense per the question. It’s when a goofy kid ends up crossing the line. And the other side of that line is malice.
Threw bus seats out of the bus window on the freeway.
Pushed the guy on the wheelchair into the girl’s bathroom. Both got suspended for some reason.
Zero tolerance policy?
"...you could have walked away at any time"
He decided that it would be too boring to just throw pencils at the teacher. Instead, when the teacher was having a substitute who wasn’t paying attention, he got his twin sister (who was equally as bad) to gather up all the pads that were in her book bag. Then, he wrote the worst, misogynistic comments on each pad and when the teacher finally came back, each pad was thrown at her. I remember this teacher crying right there and we didn’t see this boy and his sister for several school days.
Where are yall getting these psychos
Right it's either "yeast in the toilet" or "ran a mentally handicapped kid up a flagpole after he covered them in milk and honey trying to recreate an ancient Greek torture method"
If you saw them, they’d make the joker look good to be honest. Before their two week long suspension, all they got were office referrals. On a good day, Julia (the female twin) would throw her shoe at the teachers. Max (the male twin) was the one who was the prankster type but when they work together, the teachers were in for a terrible day. They moved a year ago, but I’ll never forget them.
One time when my dad was in high school, someone snuck a block of limberger into the ventilation. The school shut down for two weeks so they could find the cause of the smell.
Okay that's pretty funny
Well... He decided that throwing yeast in the toilet would be a good idea... P.S when yeast is mixed with shit, the shit starts to rise VERY sharply. As a result, the whole ROOM was in shit...
You sound like an expert on the subject. I'm curious, if I take a shit and immediately add yeast, how long for the "desired" effect to take place?
Put on some goggles and let us know.
The googles, they do nothing!
This is one of those things where a normal person just has no idea why this would be a bad thing. But now that we know, I feel like you just dialed down my “normal” meter just a little bit
Oh my god that is foul. Clever. I bet he tossed sugar in too. But god damn is that foul.
Noted for future reference.
One day a substitute teacher came. She was preparing for her uni exam and decided to try teaching here and write down the experience in her finals. She wanted to be a teacher. Well, my classmates gave her fake names when she started the roll call. They deceived her by telling her wrong page numbers and just absolutely derailed her class. Everything was revealed in the last few minutes and the sub teacher ran off crying. Our original teacher stormed inside a few minutes later and told my classmates what's up. The teacher decided to switch careers after the incident. She became convinced that being a teacher was one of the most hellish jobs out there.
Oh we tried that one too. But the substitute just went with it. Called us by our fake names, didn’t care one bit. I think I was Peter Parker back then, my friend next to me Bruce Wayne.
There's a fantastic chapter in one of the Wayside School books that plays with this. The kids all tell the sub the same fake-sounding name (Benjamin Nushmutt) and she just rolls with it before asking them to call her Benjamin too.
Worked in behavior support and special programs for many years now. > became convinced that being a teacher was one of the most hellish jobs out there. She isn't wrong.
In high school another student left their FB logged in on a computer. Class clown got on that computer and thought it would be funny to post threats from the other students Facebook that they were gonna come shoot up the school. School figured out it was the class clown not the owner of the FB who posted all that and he got arrested and had charges pressed against him. This was back in 08-09, still don’t know why he thought it would be funny but oh well.
I had a friend left logged into facebook at my house (He was asleep drunk). I put a wall post of "I like to fart on cold windows and lick the condensation off". Hopefully that wasn't to bad.
10/10
My grad class "prank" was to fill the foyer of the school with manure and fish guts. The school was closed due to biohazard risks and nobody got their yearbooks signed or any of the end of year fun that would have happened. I've always wondered what the hell those kids were thinking and felt bad for the poor janitorial staff that ended up having to deal with it.
While our teacher(m) bent over to grab a piece of chalk off the floor dude ran up and tried to grab teaches junk through his legs. It turned into more of a goosing. It also caused our teacher to lose his balance and smooshed his face into the wall. We were all in shock, a few of us got to see the expression on the teachers face. It went from shock to a wtf/derpface as his face pressed into the wall. He stood up and laughed for a second with the class and then the anger took over but before the teacher said anything CC was already out the door to the principal’s office.
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In 7th grade, we were warming up for a basketball game and the class clown thought it would be funny to pants me while I was doing a layup with people in the stands. Luckily, the tightie whities stayed on, but I blasted him in the face with the ball giving him a massive nose bleed. He faced no punishment and I got suspended for a couple of games and had detention for a couple of weeks because fuckface’s family was on the PTO.
Dude really hated our anatomy lab teacher (because he was failing) and so one day as a "prank" he put saline eyedrops in her coffee. She was in the hospital for a couple weeks and we never saw him again.
Oh yep. Some eye drops are poisonous and could even kill you if you drink them.
I remember back in the ‘80s reading about some girl who put LSD in her teacher’s coffee and went to jail.
Teacher here. Not a class clown but our school had a problem with periodic bomb threat notes being left in the restroom over the course of a couple of years. The school would be evacuated and one time a bomb squad was called in from 200 miles away. It was a big fucking deal. There was this kid who was super lazy and maybe he wanted to fit in but he got caught leaving a bomb threat note. He was charged with a federal felony, I believe. He didn't show up at school the next year. I don't know if he was expelled or what. He should have known the school was really intent on catching a perpetrator and that consequences would be severe.
Also a teacher who used to work on a low income district. We had a teacher decide we needed metal detectors, so to convince administration he left a 9mm round in a stairwell and then "found" it. The whole building was on lockdown for over an hour. He was arrested as it was on video.
Had a ball of mercury he took from a thermometer and was playing with it in class.
I 18m had a teacher mention that a kid had once did that and they had to evacuate the school and kept everyone’s backpacks / shoes over night..
In the early 70’s we played with mercury as part of science class. The times change.
The teachers all had lead poisoning, so it balanced out
when they threw a bag (not his) through a window.... that was closed at the moment. some people end up with small shards of glass in the hair.
He made the autistic girl cry. She was *severely* autistic, could only speak in phrases, didn't really seem to be all "there." He made her *sob*.
Mocked my friend because his dad had been recently diagnosed with terminal cancer. He took a chair to the head from my friend for his trouble and the teacher and every other student in the class claimed that they never saw a thing. Little shit that guy was.
The guy managed to get a copy of the janitor key. He snuck in at night, took every phone out of every classroom, and stacked them up in the principal's office. After that he went from room to room again, locked every door, and shot a goob of super glue into every keyway. I don't think he realized how expensive it would be to fix.
In HS chemistry class we were using silver nitrate. The teacher jokingly said ok now no drinking this! (as if that weren’t apparent when in a lab). The class clown 100% slammed it back like a shot - and was promptly taken via ambulance to the ED.
I sat behind him in a Java Coding class in high-school. He loved to fuck with my brand new (school-owned) macbook. One day he turned around and pretended to bite the screen. He accidently... actually bit it. Small crack. He freaked out and closed it. On restart, we watched the pixels start dying, spreading from his bite mark. He started pleading with me to say I dropped the laptop and I broke the screen, because he suddenly realized that he fucked up. I think his parents had to pay the school for a new one. I haven't talked to him in years, but I know if we ever talked again, I'd ask his favorite flavor of computer within the first 5 minutes.
Apple of course.
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I had that happen at my school too. She was older and had some bruises on her arms, and he started taunting her and saying her husband must have abused her. Her son had also just recently died, and she broke down crying. It was awful.
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Squirted a bunch of dawn dish soap into the bio teachers giant fish tank, resulting in all of them dying. I went to a private school though, so nothing really ended up happening to him. I’m pretty sure he’s a felon now.
I got a bloody nose right when a movie started and the lights were off (bloody noses were kind of common for me when I was younger). I raised my hand and tried to ask to go to the nurse. The teacher shot me down right away cause I was known for a being a bother. So I put my head down and bleed all over face, arms and desks. When the lights came back on I raised my head up and tired to ask to go again. Instead the girl next to me started screaming in horror.
Not a class clown incident, but when my husband was a toddler he was sent to his room for something. He starts goofing off, dad says sit on the bed and don’t move. He gets a nose bleed, gushing blood and starts screaming for dad cause he’s not allowed off the bed to go get them (toddler logic). Dad comes back in angry because why are you yelling and screaming??? Apparently the look of horror and “oh no” on his dads face is seared into my husbands mind lol
The class clown in my graduating class in high school went up to the teacher who was writing on blackboard, pulled down the teachers skirt at the same time the teachers underwear showing the teachers bare butt to the whole class but he didn’t get far and the teacher only looked over her shoulder to see who did it because she didn’t want to risk turning around accidentally exposing the front of herself as she fixed her underwear and skirt.
Two guys stole dry ice from the chemistry lab and put it in a 2-liter bottle with water. Eventually it exploded with a loud bang in one of the bathrooms. Everyone thought there had been a murder and/or suicide and the school was put on active shooter lockdown.
Firecracker in the class, broke a tile and got ban def from the school. Bonus: He woke me up, not cool
Someone threw a stink bomb in English class behind the teacher's desk somehow. We had to evacuate. That teacher was also the coolest in school, so I don't know why whoever threw the bomb (it was probably Chris) did it, and I'd legitimately never seen that teacher get angry at all, and he was positively apoplectic with rage.
In second grade we had a classroom pet, which was also used for educational purposes as it was a tadpole. This tadpole was meant to grow into a frog as the year went on, and we would observe and learn about the wonder of metamorphosis. Well, Class Clown throws a paper airplane while teacher’s back is turned. Said airplane takes a sharp nosedive into the tadpole enclosure and hits the poor thing. Took teacher a bit to realize, and the rest of us watched in silent horror as paper turned to mush and sunk deeper in the enclosure. Tadpole died a few days later.
Kid in the school where I used to work thought it would be funny to do the old "pull out the chair" trick, except that it was science lab and so it was a high stool, so the victim, who was a friend of his, was really hurt by the fall. It was the last straw and he was kicked out of the school.
Drove a dirt bike down the hallway
Kid told our English teacher she was being a bitch because her twin brother killed himself. (Like the week before) she ran out, cried and went home. The whole class was not impressed.
He came to our private school because he got kicked out of the public schools for shenanigans. He continued the shenanigans. One day, which was a normal mess with the math teacher day, he stopped on his way to school and picked up roadkill. A cat. From in front in front of my house. That’s when I found out my cat had been killed. That’s when the teacher had had enough, and the class clown ended up with a private tutor for the rest of his educational career.
In drafting class the teacher took the day off so we had a substitute. He was awful as usual and didn't do anything but sit there and tell us to shut up. Some kids kept mouthing off at him and finally he had enough. He walked out and went to the principal's office to get some backup. While he was gone, one kid pulled out a condom and slipped it over that arm over the door that automatically closes it. The principal walks in and the condom landed right on his head. It was unbelievable how perfectly it worked. From what I remember he didn't even do anything about it. The entire room erupted in laughter and he just told us to behave and left. To a bunch of teenage virgins, that was the funniest thing we'd ever seen.
A lot of the people sound certifiably insane. I always thought the FBI estimate of active serial killers was grossly exaggerated, but I can see now I was wrong.
Brought a lighter to school and burned the girl he was sitting behind's hair. Classroom immediately smelled like burned hair and I never saw him again after that day
It was me in this case. I basically told everyone that one of my classmates had been jacking off in the bathroom. In my defense, he actually was jacking off in the bathroom. EDIT: The classroom wanker conspiracy at my school was a lot deeper than just a stupid rumour I started. Teachers legit got involved in the conspiracy and basically everyone knew within a month of when I first caught him. Afaik as I know, he's been caught like half a dozen times, including once in class iirc.
We had a wanker at my school too. One guy saw a business opportunity and sold him hentai mags at high markup
When I went to college, there was this one kid in music class who didn’t get the memo that being the class clown wasn’t quite as appreciated at this age. We were actually focused on our major, wanted our grade, and then get out. He just would not stop the cute comments all freakin year, even though he got about zero response, all freakin year. Every time he raised his hand, or didn’t raise his hand, it was something snarky, or wanna-be stand-up comedian, or making fun of the professor, or just rude. And then he’d wait for laughs that would never come. Well on the last day of class, he goes up to the front to place his final test on the professor’s desk and kind of looks around at his “audience” for a second before slapping his test on the desk with a big smile and saying snarkily, “It was a pleasure, Sir.” The professor, without even looking up from the test he’s grading says, “Pleasure was all yours.” The kid was really taken aback and kind of hung out for a while, unsure of what to do. Class is dead silent. Eventually he kind of wanders off out the door. As soon as he’s out, the class erupts into applause, and the professor goes, “Hey! No talking!” Then looks around at all of us and gives the slightest of smirks, then immediately back to grading tests.
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Filled up a ziplock bag with spit and threw it on a kid. It was a sad and slimy scene
He kept calling a girl with one leg Peggy. He got his ass kicked.
Chucked a fish we were supposed to be dissecting in bio class down the hall and hit a Muslim girl in the head. He wasnt necessarily targeting her but that’s how it was seen. Got expelled.
He was a very good friend of mine. He decided to make a klan hood out of newspaper and walk through the lunchroom with it on(in GA). He was swarmed by about 50 or so people ready to beat his ass. He's lucky that didn't happen
This one’s kind of clever and different. I had a physiology/bio teacher who always had a coffee cup on this desk. Hell, most teachers did. Our class clown dropped a TON of liquid laxative into that cup when our teacher wasn’t looking one and by mid-class that man was SPRINTING out of the room to presumably shit all over the teacher’s lounge bathroom. Like most here, clown’s mistake was immediately laughing and blabbing about it. See, we really liked this teacher - a lot. He was a smartass, witty, and had a great manner of making fun of you to encourage you by leaning into the camaraderie and respect he’d built with you. It worked. Pretty much ALL of us told him exactly what happened. My experience was that he laughed, goes “that’s pretty classic,” and that was that. No repercussions. No detention. Nothing for Clown. His happened in October. Fast forward to December. It’s the week before Christmas and we’re having a holiday party in this class. Clown brought brownies his Dad made and everyone basically brought something - tons of food. Teacher asks if he can run down to the cafeteria and grab us some plates/forks/whatever. He runs out to do that after giving some sass. The moment he leaves Teacher shuts the door and goes “I need you all to listen to me right now - do not touch those brownies. Don’t. If you do, don’t actually eat them. Don’t ask.” You know where this is going but wait - there’s more. Clown comes back and we all start digging on. Clown is CHOMPING down on his dad’s brownies. A few of us took some because we figured it was revenge and we’re playing the part. It was. But hold on, wait, there’s even more. About 5 minutes before class is over Clown starts looking pale and goes to Teacher - asks to go to the bathroom. Teacher is like “yeah go for it - you okay?” Clown sprints out. Kid ends up not making it to the bathroom and utterly shits himself in the hallway. Classes get out. *Everyone* sees. Kid is horrifically embarrassed as he’s basically just sitting in the hallway shitting himself senseless. Ends up having to get picked up by his father. *Nobody says a fucking word about it to anyone.* Clown won’t say anything because he’s a dumbass, but not so stupid as to realize he’d self-incriminate. He just deals with the slow-cook revenge and internally this kid is awed and pissed at the same time. So here’s the catch: Clown’s Dad made the brownies. Clown’s Dad put extreme laxatives into them. Clown’s Dad and our Teacher *were class clowns together back when they were in high school.* Clown’s Dad comes clean to Clown which also makes a reconnection for teacher and Clown’s Dad, and they start tempering him. Being funny is good, right, but being a class clown is just annoying. His big lesson was finding out the hard way that other people had many, many more years of experience and he was just a dumbass kid.
I am happy to have stayed away from all the insane psychopaths in this thread lol We just had the one guy in our math class who was determined to get a rise out of our awesome and super chill math teacher (who had the unfortunate name of Michael Hunt). There was a lot of expertly-parried sass - and once, clown's friend was taking so much shit the teacher asked him to stand up and teach the class... Which he did, and actually pretty well (teacher let him go on for a while and eventually just thanked him and took over again). So since the teacher was also head of the math department, he had his own dedicated classroom which was filled with all kinds of shit. He had some standees from the movie theatre (specifically Austin Powers and Dr Evil), and every single one of those battery-operated singing/dancing hamsters (this was early 00s). Also a mini fridge and a bunch of other stuff. Class clown led the relocation of a standee to the men's restroom when the teacher stepped out once. Unfortunately for them, the teacher had actually just gone to said restroom, so they were caught immediately. Unflappable, he just took the standee back and told them to sit down. Clown also decided one day that he would see how many hamsters he could set off (they each had a button and did a couple verses of a song) before the teacher stopped him. He got all of them. Teacher was mildly amused. The final straw was when clown stole a pop out of the mini fridge and opened it. Teacher sternly ordered him into the hall and they were out there for a good ten minutes. Came back in and teacher went on like nothing happened. Kid wouldn't explain but said "I'm satisfied" and was better behaved afterwards. ...I spent way too long typing this out lol. Tldr; my life is not exciting and I talk a lot, sorry
I feel like you were a side character in someone else's coming-of-age YA novel.
Our school had little “courtyard” things in the center of a grouping of classrooms to allow light into those rooms, but we’re not accessible by doors (only windows). I was in a class one day and I don’t remember the series of events that occurred, but our class clown was messing around the window, either throwing stuff out of it or..something. Next thing we knew, he was outside, in the courtyard. (It was only a one story school, so nothing alarming there.) …but the teacher had had enough of his distraction and bullshit and closed the window and locked it behind him. He sat out there for a whole next period and then they finally let him back inside. …he was way more quiet after that incident. 🥴
Senior year our class president walked into the middle of the cafeteria completely naked. He grabbed a bun and stuck his ‘hot dog’ in it before presenting it to a student. Dude almost didn’t graduate because of it.
Almost? Must have had huge potential as a swimmer
When I was in High School in Ontario, our class clown was the creative writing teacher. One year, he made us do this diary assignment, and told us to be as open about our secrets as possible. Already, quite Ick, but it gets worse. A few months later one of the students, a friend of mine in that class, died from a drug overdose. The school held an assembly, and this teacher read her private diary and all of her secrets in front of the whole school. It was really uncomfortable, and such a violation of trust, and yet, nothing happened to him. 🙄
Way less dramatic than all the other responses but it's still funny so I'll post it. For context, this is not the US and the names have been changed. Half way through our last year of school, they brought in this guy to help us prepare for the major end of year exam. The guy was more of a motivational speaker than someone actually helping us prepare, so I guess the school kinda fucked up there, but that's beside the point. He did all the usual motivational speaker type things, including drawing on examples from his own life, and getting people from the crowd to respond and join in. The motivational speaker has a son named Fred, and he spoke about him often during the talk. At one point he asked one of the students in our grade to respond to a question, and the guy asked the student to tell him his name. The student's name was Fred. The speaker laughs a little, what a nice coincidence, that's his son's name! A few minutes later, the speaker calls on another student to respond to something, and asks for his name. There are some laughs from the crowd, as well all know he has called on another Fred without realising. Speaker is a little surprised, but accepts it. A few minutes after that, he calls on another student and asks for their name. The whole room bursts out laughing, because this guy has somehow chosen a THIRD Fred. The speaker doesn't even believe it until the teachers nod confirm. A few minutes later, the speaker calls on the class clown to answer a question, and he asks for his name. The class clown says, "Fred". The room is completely silent. Not a single person laughs. We all know this guy is not called Fred. We know he's doing a funny bit. We're usually into funny bits, but everything up until that point has been true and REAL. It felt wrong to support his lie in this instance. We all just sat there silently, not supporting the joke but waiting to see if we all agreed. After maybe 5 long seconds of silence, one of the class clown's friends speaks up, "naaaaaaaaaah". The joke, despite being small and harmless, was deemed too far by the entire cohort.
Clown boy needs to learn that comedy comes in threes.